1st Trimester

They wouldn't let H in for u/s

Yesterday when I had my u/s they wouldn't let my husband in the room with me. I insisted that he be in the room with me, but the u/s technician said, "No, I'll show him the baby later." We only found a sac, so they never let him in the room, but I was so upset by this.

Has anyone else had this happen before? I thought it was strange.

Edit: It wasn't at a hospital or in an emergency situation. It was at the u/s office that my doctor referred us to.

BFP 06/05/2013 | EDD 02/10/2014 | D&C 07/12/2013

Re: They wouldn't let H in for u/s

  • I am shocked, I've never heard of not letting a husband in the room.  weird.  I'd be pissed
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  • ash413ash413
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    Thats weird, I have my first OB appointment and U/S in a couple weeks, I told them my husband would be there and they said that they encourage father's being there for the first u/s. I think that was totally out of line, it is his child too, and she obviously knew that you wanted him there!
  • Did you say anything to your doctor about it. I would insist next time. Don't feel bad about it either. 
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  • i'd be talking to your doctor(or another higher-up at the hospital) about that tech. i would be PISSED if they didn't let H in for my u/s.
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  • I've heard of it happening when the ultrasound is transvaginal, the pregnancy is very early and the facility protocol dictates that even the patient cannot see the u/s screen. Sometimes when it's very early and it may be difficult to see something the techs do have the ability to say no to allowing others in the room. It's more to protect them from getting pressure to answer questions that should be answered by the doctor.  The more ppl in there the more questions they get

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  • image ziggy903:
    i'd be talking to your doctor(or another higher-up at the hospital) about that tech. i would be PISSED if they didn't let H in for my u/s.

    i wouldn't talk about the tech; I would first find out the facility's protocol. If their protocol dictates that DH should have been allowed in the room, then I would mention that the tech didn't allow it.

     

    I carry you with me into the world, into the smell of rain & the words that dance between people & for me, it will always be this way, walking in the light, remembering being alive together. - Brian Andreas

    I never knew emptiness could weigh so much, she said.  I can barely hold it.  So he sat beside her & reached for her hand, and they held it together. - Brian Andreas

    4 cycles of "TTC" - 2 intentional, 2 not so intentional.  4 BFPs.  No children.
    ~ Returned to trying in March - BFP 04.10.2013 - EDD 12.22.2013 ~ TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little boy.
    ~ Started TTC 12.1.2012 - BFP 12.20.2012~  m/c 1.2.2013
    ~ Surprise BFP 7.26.12 - Lost poppy seed* 8.13.12 <3 ~

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  • image VCGolfNYC:
    I've heard of it happening when the ultrasound is transvaginal, the pregnancy is very early and the facility protocol dictates that even the patient cannot see the u/s screen.nbsp;

    Maybe this is why then. However she tried to do the regular ultrasound first because she thought that I was just there to date the pregnancy. I ended up having the transvaginal u/s when they couldn't see anything.

    It was very stressful without my husband in the room with me. And stressful for him waiting in the waiting room for me and not knowing what was going on.

    BFP 06/05/2013 | EDD 02/10/2014 | D&C 07/12/2013
  • image cmely30:
    image VCGolfNYC:
    I've heard of it happening when the ultrasound is transvaginal, the pregnancy is very early and the facility protocol dictates that even the patient cannot see the u/s screen.nbsp;
    Maybe this is why then. However she tried to do the regular ultrasound first because she thought that I was just there to date the pregnancy. I ended up having the transvaginal u/s when they couldn't see anything. It was very stressful without my husband in the room with me. And stressful for him waiting in the waiting room for me and not knowing what was going on.

    I still think thats weird.  At my first appointment for both kids, I had a regular and transvaginal U/S done.  DH was there for both.  I'd definitely ask their policy's, a first U/S is a big thing to share with your spouse.  I'd be really sad without him there.

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  • image VCGolfNYC:

    image ziggy903:
    i'd be talking to your doctor(or another higher-up at the hospital) about that tech. i would be PISSED if they didn't let H in for my u/s.

    i wouldn't talk about the tech; I would first find out the facility's protocol. If their protocol dictates that DH should have been allowed in the room, then I would mention that the tech didn't allow it.

     

     

    This. Although I have never heard of not being able to have DH in the room.  Maybe like PP mentioned they didn't want to have questions asked that they could not answer?  I would do some research on the hospital/place you got it done and go from there. 

  • I have had MANY t/v ultrasounds with DH in the room. If this is an office policy, I find it very odd.

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  • image cmely30:
    Yesterday when I had my u/s they wouldn't let my husband in the room with me. I insisted that he be in the room with me, but the u/s technician said, "No, I'll show him the baby later." We only found a sac, so they never let him in the room, but I was so upset by this. Has anyone else had this happen before? I thought it was strange.

    This is common practice for many places. You need to ask the hospital or radiology department what their policies are. The technician is probably just following protocol and its unfair of you to get upset with her for just following the rules of her job. She may not agree with it either and totally want your husband in there. However, it might be policy because extra people equal extra distractions.

    I can understand being upset (especially if you don't get good news) but the hospital can't make exceptions for you just because you are upset. I've only had it happen once in an emergency room situation (I was in a car accident last pregnancy). My husband was on a business trip, but my good friend couldn't be in the room (though I wanted him to be because I was scared). Thankfully all was well and he could come in after they did a few checks etc.

    Its not something personal against you.  

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  • In many hospitals in my area Ontario they do not let anyone in the room before the 12 week mark.

    After that people are welcome.

    I want even allowed to see the screen on one of my early ultrasounds.

    I know it can be unsettling but hang in there hopefully he can join you for your next us
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  • That's really strange. My ob does have me sign a form tho at the beginning of every pregnancy giving permission for my husband to be present and be in the room. If it was that big of an issue I don't see why they wouldn't have that as an option. 
  • image VCGolfNYC:

    I've heard of it happening when the ultrasound is transvaginal, the pregnancy is very early and the facility protocol dictates that even the patient cannot see the u/s screen. Sometimes when it's very early and it may be difficult to see something the techs do have the ability to say no to allowing others in the room. It's more to protect them from getting pressure to answer questions that should be answered by the doctor.  The more ppl in there the more questions they get

     

    this

    I'd ask your doctor the procedures for ultrasounds at their practice.  My doctor does let family in the room but I did go to the ER last year for a m/c and they did not let anyone in with me because the hospital policy is that the tech does not show the patient the screen or give any information while doing it.

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  • At the hospital that I had my DS my DH wasn't allowed in the room during any of my u/s and I wasn't allowed to see the screen while the tech checked everything. At the very end the tech would let my DH in to show us the baby. This was there hospital policy. It sucks but there isn't anything you can do about it. Sorry.
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  • image VCGolfNYC:

    I've heard of it happening when the ultrasound is transvaginal, the pregnancy is very early and the facility protocol dictates that even the patient cannot see the u/s screen. Sometimes when it's very early and it may be difficult to see something the techs do have the ability to say no to allowing others in the room. It's more to protect them from getting pressure to answer questions that should be answered by the doctor.  The more ppl in there the more questions they get

    This is true. Our hospital doesn't allow for transvag u/s done in radiology to have guests.

             Anon stands corrected.

     
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  • I have u/s this coming Monday.  I am planning to bring my mother so she can see and believe that I'm pregnant.... 
  • I am really shocked by this!  I have never heard of such a thing.  Sorry you experienced this :/

  • image Jade K:
    I have u/s this coming Monday.  I am planning to bring my mother so she can see and believe that I'm pregnant.... 

    Nothing like a dildocam for grandma, eh?

             Anon stands corrected.

     
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  • IdaniIdani
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    My office always does measurements and initial things first before bringing anyone else into the room.  I never thought it was strange?
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  • Thank you for this post! I am sorry they didn't let him in there! It never occurred to me that I might have problems with having a guest come too. DH cant come to my early u/s next week so I asked my mom to go with me for support. I just called my u/s place and they will let her in. I think it is strange to not at least allow the DH in but I guess this just tells us to check the hospitals policies.

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  • I've never heard of this either.

    Sorry he couldn't come in with you.  I would ask about their policies like PP's have said.  

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  • For my first DS my husband wasn't allowed in the room when they were doing the scan that scans for downs and trisometry (SP?) 13.  But the tech called him in to see the ultrasound once she was done getting the info that she needed.  It was at a hospital and I think it is just distracting for them when people are asking lots of questions. 

    But to not be called in after when she said she would do that itsnt right and she shouldn't be so rude about it either.  And if it was the policy of the clinic then she should just say that.

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  • image cmely30:
    Yesterday when I had my u/s they wouldn't let my husband in the room with me. I insisted that he be in the room with me, but the u/s technician said, "No, I'll show him the baby later." We only found a sac, so they never let him in the room, but I was so upset by this. Has anyone else had this happen before? I thought it was strange.
    That does sound strange.  Did you ask your doctor about it? I would let them know your upset about it so they can explain why they didn't let him back there.  I mean its his baby too.
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  • Thanks for everyone's feedback. It makes me feel better knowing that I am not the only one who had this happened.

    It is my first pregnancy and both my husband and I were shocked that he couldn't come in with me. Plus, the woman was quite rude about it. I came out of the washroom and she wanted to take me right away. I told her my husband was in the waiting room and that's when she said he couldn't come in. I told her that I had to tell him that I was going in without him, so he knew where I was, and she wasn't even going to let me do that. She just said - "He'll know where you are." I knew he wouldn't know where I was, so I went to tell him anyway, and she was frustrated with me.

    Oh well - it's done now. Someday when I get to see a baby on the ultrasound, he will be there, too, I'm sure Smile


    BFP 06/05/2013 | EDD 02/10/2014 | D&C 07/12/2013
  • Goodness! If it is hospital protocol to not allow a spouse into the room they should post that policy at their reception desk so that expecting mothers can make an informed decision. I can't think of any scenario in which this would work for me. I would have gotten off that table and bid her adieu! ( I would complain to the facility and let them know that they will not receive your business in the future as long as this policy is in place!)
  • I didn't consider that this may have been done in an ER or Hospital setting. I just assumed that you meant a perinatal center or doctors office. ( I know. I know.) If it was an emergency situation in a hospital setting I can understand not allowing others in the room. Perinatal centers have physicians on staff that review the u/s on site. At least that is how it works in our area.
  • My DH was not allowed in the room at the beginning of either of my u/s. It was their protocol. He was allowed in after the tech said everything was fine. It made me PO the first time, but then I learned their policy and figured it is what it is.
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  • image Tallulahsmom:
    Goodness! If it is hospital protocol to not allow a spouse into the room they should post that policy at their reception desk so that expecting mothers can make an informed decision. I can't think of any scenario in which this would work for me. I would have gotten off that table and bid her adieu! ( I would complain to the facility and let them know that they will not receive your business in the future as long as this policy is in place!)

    The policy is to protect their staff, especially in legal situations. They don't have to change a policy just because expecting mothers do not like it.  These policies are in place for a reason.  Again, it could be because she is so early in her pregnancy.  The policy could be that the tech gets to make the decision on a case-by-case basis. 

    I carry you with me into the world, into the smell of rain & the words that dance between people & for me, it will always be this way, walking in the light, remembering being alive together. - Brian Andreas

    I never knew emptiness could weigh so much, she said.  I can barely hold it.  So he sat beside her & reached for her hand, and they held it together. - Brian Andreas

    4 cycles of "TTC" - 2 intentional, 2 not so intentional.  4 BFPs.  No children.
    ~ Returned to trying in March - BFP 04.10.2013 - EDD 12.22.2013 ~ TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little boy.
    ~ Started TTC 12.1.2012 - BFP 12.20.2012~  m/c 1.2.2013
    ~ Surprise BFP 7.26.12 - Lost poppy seed* 8.13.12 <3 ~

      image


  • Maybe its regional. 

    In my pregnancies I only get the 20 week U/S but for all of them it's always been that I go in first, alone, while they do all the measurements, etc. Then they bring DH in after for the "fun stuff"; looking at baby, etc.  

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