DH and I are TTC for baby #2 and I have tried humoring him with a few things and I am at the end of my patience with him and could use some advice.
Issue one-We have talked about ttc for a few months now (trying as of June 1) and whenever we talk about it he always mentions putting a football star in there and how our DS will have a little brother. When I mention there are odds of having a girl he gives me this look like Im crazy and says well he is going to have a little brother.
I get it, he had a younger brother he grew up with so I think it would be an adjustment for him to be around a little girl (there hasn't been a girl born in his side of the family for the last eight years). Whenever I say well I wanted one of each he says he doesn't care what it is as long as it's healthy.... but then follows up with wanting a football star and complains about how much stuff we would have to get if we had a little girl. (I know cart before horse situation here).
Issue two- DH... I love him. I really really really do. But sometimes I want to knee him in the shins. DS was a honeymoon baby, we weren't really trying but we weren't really NOT trying so there wasn't any charting or temping or anything I am doing right now. I gave up talking to him about it after a few days but he doesn't seem to grasp the concept that ovulation and the odds of having sex during my fertility window will give us greater chances. Whenever we started at the start of the month (I don't ovulate till THIS weekend) he said a few days later "there is prob a baby in there!" And he has said this every few days since. I know he is excited to start trying and so am I but I would like him to be a little less in la-la-land and come back to Earth just a tad.
Issue three (I promise I will shut up after this)- DH and I told EVERYONE we were pregnant right away last time. Partially that was because he was overseas and I was still in the states and we wanted me to have a bigger support group through the first trimester. The problem was.... everyone knew. Everyone was asking me how I was feeling 30 times a day and when sometime went wrong with the preterm labor... everyone knew about it. So this go around I said I didn't want to tell anyone until the amnio came back and we knew the gender. If it was a girl I didn't want to tell anyone till the birth (again, no girls born in eight years and his mother basically begged us to have a girl last time, because that is so in our control right?) because his mom is a shop-aholic and I would love to have some of her closet bought by us rather than stuff his mom picked out (really not ungrateful here but last time DS was born she bought mountains of clothes for him without telling us and we had a giant pile we got and a giant pile from her and most of it didn't get worn so to me that was a waste on both parts). But DH said I needed to consider his mother and tell her asap like last time.
Again, I know this is cart before horse here but we are both Type A's so this stuff gets talked about a lot. I have tried humoring him about this stuff but I am really getting frustrated about him living in la-la-land and my words landing on deaf ears. Short of tuning him out or not talking about all this I don't know what to do.
Suggestions? Thanks in advance for your input :)