Loss

Q's to ask at D and E follow up appt? ticker warning

I lost my baby at 19w due to pProm, and had a DE. My follow up appointment is in a couple of weeks.

If you were in a similar situation, what questions did you have? Obviously, we want to know why, though we know it's unlikely that they'll have answers. We'll probably get autopsy results then.

We're unsure if we'll try again. Frankly, I'm terrified at the thought, but we will ask when it is safe to TTC again, if we decide to do it.

Anything else?
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DS1: BFP: 4/4/2011 | EDD: 12/2/2011 | Born 11/21/2011
DS2: BFP: 2/23/13 | EDD: 10/26/13 | We said goodbye: 6/2/13 (19w1d) due to pPROM

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Re: Q's to ask at D and E follow up appt? ticker warning

  • Hugs to you. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you have come to a very supportive board filled with ladies who really understand. I honestly don't know where I would be today without the support of this board. Reading posts and venting myself has been so helpful to know that I am not alone.

    I think if I were you, I would want to know what kind of monitoring would be done next time should you decide to try again. I am not too familiar with pProm so I would ask what the likelihood of this happening again would be.

    As for the autopsy, keep in mind that it will be very difficult to hear regardless of whether you have answers or not. When we lost our daughter I wasn't expecting that the doctor would read over everything out loud and be so brutally honest and that was upsetting. I guess there is nothing you can do to be prepared for it but I was caught off guard a bit. 

    As for trying again, that is a completely personal decision. Like you, when I first lost my daughter trying again was just not something that I was open to at all because I was terrified of it happening all over again. However, as time went by that did change. Hopefully hearing from your doctor about the chances of this happening again and the monitoring next time will help you to make that decision too.  Keep in mind that you don't need to decide if you are going to try again right now. Your loss is still so new so be gentle with yourself.

     You are in my thoughts and prayers. 

    TTC #1 BFP #1 M/C November 13, 2010 BFP #2 M/C April 20, 2011 BFP #3 We lost our baby girl who is forever in our hearts.
  • I'm not familiar with pProm but I had a D&E at 19 weeks.

    As PP mentioned definitely ask about the liklihood of it happening again and what extra measures they will take...also ask if there are any extra measures you should/could take like extra vitamins/things you need to stay away from or do as soon as you find out you are KU again.

    I also made a list of things I thought I did to cause it (painting, using acne cream, etc. etc.)  (even though they told me that it was just a fluke and there was nothing I did wrong)...it helped because when I started reading her the list she reiterated that it wasn't my fault and I did nothing wrong. 

    I wasn't prepared for how upset I was after the appointment...which may have just been me...I was really upset the rest of the day...and we already knew why she died...It was just really hard for me. 

    ((hugs))

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    5/7/13- MMC (8 Weeks)

    11/6/13- BO discovered at 7 weeks- natural MC 11/25/13

    All Alers Welcome

  • I'm not even sure how I'll make it to the appointment. My OB's office is inside the hospital. I had to change the route I drive to work, the hospital was on my route, and I had a panic attack when I drove past it.

    My fiance has said he's coming with me, so I'm grateful for that.
    Food Blog

    DS1: BFP: 4/4/2011 | EDD: 12/2/2011 | Born 11/21/2011
    DS2: BFP: 2/23/13 | EDD: 10/26/13 | We said goodbye: 6/2/13 (19w1d) due to pPROM

    image

  • I am so sorry for your loss. ((Hugs))

    I lost my son at 17 weeks due to pPROM. When I went for my follow up, my biggest questions were why and how. The doctors were not able to provide me with many unfortunately. Basically, we all we know are the mechanics (my large SCH caused a small placental abruption, which caused my water to break). I also asked what the chances were of it occurring again and what monitoring I would be receiving for any subsequent pregnancies. 

    My MFM's office is also in the same building that I delivered. It was not easy going back there, but having your FI there will help! I was a slobbering mess, but I honestly didn't care.

     Once again, huge, huge hugs!  


    "Keep on dreaming even if it breaks your heart"


    BFP#1: EDD 10/19/2007 DD born 9/26/07 at 36 weeks due to PIH and Pre-E

    BFP#2- EDD 12/23/2012 DS born 7/16/12 at 17 weeks due to PPROM and placental abruption
    You will be in my heart forever sweet boy

    BFP#3: EDD 7/30/12 MMC at 7 weeks, 2 days, D&C 12/14/12
    BFP #4: 6/29/13- EDD 3/10/2014 DS born 2/22/2014
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie First Birthday tickers
    **PAL/PGAL Always Welcome!!!**
  • image a&aw12707:

    I am so sorry for your loss. ((Hugs))

    I lost my son at 17 weeks due to pPROM. When I went for my follow up, my biggest questions were why and how. The doctors were not able to provide me with many unfortunately. Basically, we all we know are the mechanics (my large SCH caused a small placental abruption, which caused my water to break). I also asked what the chances were of it occurring again and what monitoring I would be receiving for any subsequent pregnancies. 

    My MFM's office is also in the same building that I delivered. It was not easy going back there, but having your FI there will help! I was a slobbering mess, but I honestly didn't care.

     Once again, huge, huge hugs!  

    I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for your response. 

    I'm not familiar with what "SCH" stands for.  

    Food Blog

    DS1: BFP: 4/4/2011 | EDD: 12/2/2011 | Born 11/21/2011
    DS2: BFP: 2/23/13 | EDD: 10/26/13 | We said goodbye: 6/2/13 (19w1d) due to pPROM

    image

  • Sorry! SCH= Subchorionic hemmorrage. It's basically a blood clot. (As my dr explained to me. I've learned more about them after it happened to me)

    ETA: Added a little :) 


    "Keep on dreaming even if it breaks your heart"


    BFP#1: EDD 10/19/2007 DD born 9/26/07 at 36 weeks due to PIH and Pre-E

    BFP#2- EDD 12/23/2012 DS born 7/16/12 at 17 weeks due to PPROM and placental abruption
    You will be in my heart forever sweet boy

    BFP#3: EDD 7/30/12 MMC at 7 weeks, 2 days, D&C 12/14/12
    BFP #4: 6/29/13- EDD 3/10/2014 DS born 2/22/2014
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie First Birthday tickers
    **PAL/PGAL Always Welcome!!!**
  • image aaw12707:
    Sorry! SCH= Subchorionic hemmorrage. It's basically a blood clot. As my dr explained to me. I've learned more about them after it happened to meETA: Added a little :nbsp;

    Oh, ok, thanks. During my ultrasound that night, they thought they saw a clot causing a partial abruption, but they didn't say much about it.
    Food Blog

    DS1: BFP: 4/4/2011 | EDD: 12/2/2011 | Born 11/21/2011
    DS2: BFP: 2/23/13 | EDD: 10/26/13 | We said goodbye: 6/2/13 (19w1d) due to pPROM

    image

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