Working Moms

Bruises f/up

I fired her. She claims the bruises were there yesterday am and she "meant to mention them". This could be true. I didn't take Baby's sleeper off before work yesterday so I didn't see her legs myself before work, but nothing was there the night before. My parents could have accidentally caused thigh bruises when taking her out of the high chair this weekend that didn't show up until yesterday morning?? But, that's iffy, and we still can't explain the weird and significant marks on Baby's wrist. Bottom line is that there were already too many questions and some other questionable behaviour in only three days with us, and even though I don't think she would intentionally harm the baby, I could no longer feel okay leaving her alone with the kids. Fair or not. 

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Re: Bruises f/up

  • "Fair" is leaving your children with a caretaker that you feel comfortable with.  You did nothing wrong.
    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
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  • I agree. If you feel uneasy, there is probably a reason.  In almost anything in life (related to childcare or not), I have almost never regretted going with my gut.  It has only been when I have ignored my gut feeling about a person or situation that I have regretted it.
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  • I am so glad you took decisive action.  I agree with PP that going with your gut - and in the face of evidence - is absolutely the right thing.
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  • I agree that you needed to go with your gut on this one.  If there were other minor issues and things just weren't adding up, I would do the same thing.  Even though I'm sure the search is a PIA, it will be worth it when you find the right caretaker.
  • image EastCoastBride:
    "Fair" is leaving your children with a caretaker that you feel comfortable with.  You did nothing wrong.

    Yes 

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  • You need to do what you feel comfortable with, but doesn't it take a few days for a bruise to show up?  DS hit his ear at daycare and they told me about it right away, but it wasn't for a good 3 days or so later until it looked bruised
  • image mommymegan831:
    You need to do what you feel comfortable with, but doesn't it take a few days for a bruise to show up?  DS hit his ear at daycare and they told me about it right away, but it wasn't for a good 3 days or so later until it looked bruised
      kind of this....not knocking you for doing what you feel is right for your family.  That's every momma's job.  That being said, i think firing this chick without even really being open to her answer (which it sounds like you werent) is kind of pointless.  At the end of the day though, they are your kids and whatever you feel comfortable with is whats best for you guys.

  • I thought a lot about timing of bruising, actually. I Googled it last night and I guess bruises show up quite differently on different people. When DD got shots last week, she had bruising within a few hours. So I don't know, but that's the whole point...I don't know, and I couldn't feel good about leaving the kids with her. Additionally, she had very questionable judgement in a situation with DD, she didn't take the kids outside all day yesterday even though we said she should and it was a gorgeous day, and she let them watch TV, which we talked about not doing. And, she had one reference who thought that this girl stole something. So....all in all..I had a lot of red flags going on.
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  • LoCarbLoCarb
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    I agree sounds like you did the right thing...trust your gut!
    Mommy of two girls: DD1 4/14/9 DD2 4/15/11
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  • image NicoleWI:
    I thought a lot about timing of bruising, actually. I Googled it last night and I guess bruises show up quite differently on different people. When DD got shots last week, she had bruising within a few hours. So I don't know, but that's the whole point...I don't know, and I couldn't feel good about leaving the kids with her. Additionally, she had very questionable judgement in a situation with DD, she didn't take the kids outside all day yesterday even though we said she should and it was a gorgeous day, and she let them watch TV, which we talked about not doing. And, she had one reference who thought that this girl stole something. So....all in all..I had a lot of red flags going on.

    Oh, why did you hire her?  I wouldn't have hired her just based on this.  You did the right thing.  I would install cameras if you plan to do the nanny route.  That's just me though.  This is why I like DC centers with seriously strict standards. 

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  • image NicoleWI:
    I thought a lot about timing of bruising, actually. I Googled it last night and I guess bruises show up quite differently on different people. When DD got shots last week, she had bruising within a few hours. So I don't know, but that's the whole point...I don't know, and I couldn't feel good about leaving the kids with her. Additionally, she had very questionable judgement in a situation with DD, she didn't take the kids outside all day yesterday even though we said she should and it was a gorgeous day, and she let them watch TV, which we talked about not doing. And, she had one reference who thought that this girl stole something. So....all in all..I had a lot of red flags going on.

    I probably wouldn't have fired her over the bruises, but if she's already not following the house rules on day 2, I applaud you for dealing with her quickly. 

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