August 2011 Moms

my dog frustrates me.

It's getting to the point where I don't know what to do any more. She has become a nasty b!tch lately, and DH wants to rehome her. In fact, he has wanted to 'get rid of her' for awhile now.
Which is why I am conflicted.. today I was out running some errands and he claims she snapped at Stella while she was eating. She has only ever snapped one other time, and it was at me, when she was on the bed and I booted her off.
She has had fleas this season, despite being an inside dog with monthly treatments, frequent baths, etc. DH found one on himself and I found one on myself, and we are both concerned about them being on Stella. obviously we are treating the dog for them, but she still has some in the process.

She constantly waits until we are out oftthe room or gone to use the bathroom in the house, usually in Stella's play room or peeing on the same electrical cord, or you know, just a dump in the floor while we eat dinner.WWe take her out frequently, and she always has some home exceptwwhen we go out together rare, maybe 2x/ week for 3 hours. We have tried everything we know to get the behavior to stop, only allowing her food at set times, walks, longer walks, free time in the yard, puppy pads, carting but it is getting worse.
She was a rescue dog, 2 when we got her, and we have had her for almost a year. When we first got her she was very attached to me, and was essentially my dog my idea attachedto me. Now she will not come if I call her, and multiple times she has specifically scrapped on my clothes, on my purse once too.

I'm wondering if it is a separation anxiety issue, so I asked the vet. He says it is probably breed and age related. He offered medication, but saidit may not help and may cause worse behaviors, and diarrhea, itching, etc, so I didn't opt to try it.

I am beginning to regret ever getting her, and it hurts my heart because I do love her, but she is just not the family companion we thought she would be, and if she is going to continue the issues then I don't know what to do. Especially the snapping, which made Stella cry.

Sorry so long and for any typos, I am mobile, and really upset about this.
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Re: my dog frustrates me.

  • Sorry to hear this news about your pup. Has your vet checked her hearing/sight? If it's small toy dog they need tons of attention.

    I guess if your option would be to find a home. You could always check rescue centers for her breed.

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  • I'm really sorry :(  I rehomed a cat when pregnant because he wasn't going to work being a family pet. You get no flames from me for considering!
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  • I am so sorry. I had a similar post last week. If you go back you can read Crashs advice which was great.

    My dogs both had tons of accidents when we had the kids. I switched to using BioKleen to clean it up. It has a very strong lemon lime smell and the dogs stopped potting in the same places when I started using it. Also, I had to re house train them. Go outside with your dog and give treats and attention when she potties in the yard. One of our dogs isn't food motivated at all so when he potties in the yard I make him happy by clapping and telling him he's a good boy. Also, instead of flushing their poop, which I used to do, if they go in the house I take the poop outside and tell them "go outside!!"

    With the fleas, they most likely are in your carpets. Go to the store and get the largest container of salt out there. Sprinkle everything in your house with salt and let it sit a day. Vacuum it up and then repeat that process one to two more times. The fleas can't breed or live with salt. It doesn't even have to be a thick layer, just sprinkle if everywhere. You'll probably have to vacuum everyday for a few days to get all of the salt up, but it works, it's natural, and you don't have to spray anything.

    Good luck, keep us posted, and I'm not judging, I'm just trying to help.

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  • This is going to be a really long post, but read ALL of it. I C&Pd what I posted for Rachey the other day and didn't edit it specifically for you.  I added some stuff below this for fleas, peeing, etc.

    Hi, I have the craziest dog in the world and we have managed just fine so far. This is the dog who spent the first nine months of DD's life hiding under our bed until we put DD to sleep for the night. I can tell you what works for us and maybe some of it will work for you.

    Feeding-this dog gets fed only when an adult can fully supervise. We try to keep DD about 2-3 feet away from the dog while she is eating.

    Non-feeding times-we have taught/encouraged the dog to get up and move if DD is heading her way.  I assume these two will get along when DD gets older, calms down, and is generally less spastic than she is now. If the dog is sleeping and DD is approaching, we yell for the dog to get up so at least her eyes are open and she can see DD coming. If the dog gets up, I praise her. If the dog remains calm with a bash from DD, I praise her (the dog).

    DD's eating-Both dogs do best when DD is in her highchair for eating. My other dog is very food driven and will sit just inches from DD if she has food and isn't up high. This annoys DD and her reaction is to swat or kick at the dog. Well, the dog begging and DD's swiping both irritate me immensely, so I try to avoid both by using the highchair.

    Petting-We want DD to learn how to be gentle with both dogs and we want the dogs to know that DD loves them and treats them kindly. I have no problems with DD getting close to the "good" dog, but I had to figure out how to get DD near the crazy dog, too. If I have control of the dog's head, firm but gentle headlock (for lack of a better term/phrasing) I can take my other hand and guide DD's hand gently across the dog's back and then I praise both like crazy.

    If DD gets too close and the dog snarls (usually due to me slacking), I tell the dog to get up, push DD back & tell her we have to be gentle, not sneak up, etc.

    The growls & snarls are good, you want your dog to do those. They are the dog's built-in warning system. If you correct your dog and tell her not to snarl, that's when you run the risk of an "unprovoked" incident. 

    With the attention part, as soon as I put DD to bed, it's dog time. I'll either play, pet, or take them out. DH is fairly good about walking them. The dogs' favorite time of day is in the morning so I usually sit there and pet both while I'm waiting for my coffee. 

     BTW, my crazy dog LOVES to go with me to get DD up in the morning. LOVES. It's ridiculous. Both dogs like it but the one really looks forward to it.


    New stuff: Fleas are no joke. They have a life cycle of 21 days (I think). So it's an on-going battle. You can call an exterminator to bomb the house or you can try the DIY method.  I have done the DIY method before and it was a huge pain in the butt, but it worked and I didn't have to pay someone.  Flea medicine through the dog kills the fleas once they have bitten the dog, however, if the flea hops on outside, but doesn't bite, and jumps off inside, the flea medicine obviously won't work. Say that one flea lays eggs in your house, three-ish weeks later you're going to have more fleas because of the reproductive cycle. 

    For the DIY method, block the dog in a room with no carpet, preferably the bathroom. Get a flea carpet powder (like $5.00), use as directed. You have to let it sit for at least an hour then vacuum it up. (I would keep DD out of the house). Use the crevice tool to get into the corners of the floor, the furniture, dog bedding, wash all bedding on hot.  Keep washing the dog bed every week. Now that the house is clean, go wash the dog. I know some people frown on using it, but Dawn dish detergent is great-it suffocates the fleas. Get the dog wet, suds it up like a normal bath, then let it sit for five minutes, rinse very well. You should be able to see dead fleas in the water. If you ever pick a flea off you or the dog, pour some Dawn on it to ensure it is dead. There are also sprays for your yard, you may want to do that too, but be careful with a LO around. I would probably spray and keep the kid out of the yard for a while.

    You'll need to vacuum at least once a day for the next couple of weeks, it sucks, I know. Each time you vacuum, you need to change the bag or empty the canister outside (bc duh, there are living fleas in there.) If you have a canister, I'd give it a quick washing to remove any eggs that might be there. 

    For the peeing issue-did the vet rule out a UTI? Good for you for going to the vet in the first place. We might be headed there soon if I find pee on my floor today.  Anyway, start over. Yes. Go back to taking the dog out every hour. Praise like a fool. Give treats when the dog goes potty outside. Make it fun to go potty out there. 

    Close the door to any room you don't want the dog in. I'm sure you have baby gates you could use too. Don't hit, rub her nose in it, etc. if you do find an accident. Dogs can't really remember what they did and why they are now being punished.

    There's also a dog training method called Nothing In Life Is Free (or NILIF). You may want to look into that.  Lots of ladies have had great success with that when there used to be an active Pets board on TN.

     If you really want it to work out, you'll manage to put the effort into the above.

    This is officially my longest post ever. 

  • I don't have carpets, but I'm worried about keeping the fleas out of the beds/ couches/ stuffed toys. Would salt work? I'm thinking of bombing again, we just did in April as a preventative. Crash,, I love Dawn soap. I've washed her in it as much as I can at this point, and they die but within 3 hours she is itching again. I'm pretty sure the issue is in our yard, because the previous tenants had something like 9 outside dogs and over 20 cats animal hoarders.

    I will try some of the potty tips, thanks guys. I'm at home with her constantly, and she gets what I thought was plenty of attention, time outside, etc. but maybe I have been wrong.

    She is not very playful. she is extremely tolerant of Stella, seriously. Stella could and has accidentally be too rough or be in her face, and Nova just lays there. So I think she is a great family pet, in tolerance of our own ways. We just need to adjust learn to tolerate her.

    Also, the vet has ruled out a UTI and other health issues. she has been 6 times this year, 3 this month for the fleas, and twice before because I was sure she had a UTI, to be peeing in the house so.much. the other was routine.

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  • Spray the yard, for sure. We had rental neighbors next door who were awful and this is how the fleas started. The spray isn't very expensive either, we got it from Lowe's and it hooks up to your hose. Try getting the LL to do it professionally as it is a health hazard (totally pull the poor baby card), if not, eat the few bucks and do it yourself.

    Take the dog potty, bathe her, apply a different brand of flea stuff. Is the dog borderline on a different dose of medication?

    You might also want to look into Diatomaceous Earth for the dog:

  • I agree with crash, spray the yard. My dogs have gotten fleas from outside at my parents farm before.

    You can put salt on the couch, pillows, area rugs, etc. you'll want to wash anything the dog lays on or with. You can throw all sheets, towels, blankets, etc in the washer... Wash on hot. You can use BioKleen in your washer which will for sure kill them.

    Like Crash said, vacuum like a fool. Get around the edges of the rooms, on chairs, in nooks and crannies. They could be lurking in any fabric. Mark your calendar the start of daily vacuuming and give yourself a month. We had them really bad last summer. You can also give your dog the flea treatments every two weeks instead of once a month. And, try changing brands. We switched from Frontline to a different brand because I heard some fleas won't be killed by Frontline.

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  • Thanks ladies. she has been bathed again today, and unfortunately for her she is being isolated until her treatment dries. But at least she is in our room, which is her favorite place to be. I treated our bed with the salt and brought our air mattress out for me DH to let it sit as long as I can. My couch is a vinyl POS that I would throw away at the first chance for a new one, so I'm assuming I should just get it with the vacuum as much as possible?

    I'm on my way to WalMart to get more vacuum bags now, and cedar. Apparently they hate cedar?
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  • I don't know anything about cedar, but unless it kills them, I wouldn't bother with it. They aren't going to jump on out the door.  They actually need to be poisoned to death.
  • image Crash Into Me:
    They actually need to be poisoned to death.

    I skipped it, got a yard spray and sevin dust, an indoor spray, and picked up something vet approved as an addition to her medicine. And 27 vacuum bags. Die, bastards.

    Also, I took her for 2 long walks today and she loved it, and has been happily sleeping by my feet like old times.
    I'm hopeful that some changes on our part will help her mood, because she has always been a great dog prior to about 3 months ago. I'm not sure why she changed, but hopefully we can get back to how it was.
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  • I'm happy you're putting forth so much effort. It sounds like you really want this to work. Make a note ( on the calendar, reminder on your phone) for this time next year, well, whenever the fleas started, and get a jump on it ahead of time.

    I very clearly remember one day of my maternity leave. DD had been an absolute clingy crabmaster. The dogs would not stop scratching and barking. I finally flipped one dog over and her belly was crawling with fleas. Uuuuggghhhh. I grabbed DD, screaming and everything, and flew out the door to Petco where I bought one of every flea item, it seemed. Came home, bathed both dogs, locked them in the bathroom, vacuumed the hell out of the house, waited until the IL's were home, ran DD over there, came back home, put that powder down, had DH spray the yard, cleaned everything up and then went back to get DD.

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