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Forever blessed through adoption! 7-17-11

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  • We have 3 bedrooms on the main, 2 in the basement.  We or the girls are not ready to have a room downstairs yet.  I am betting when it does happen, Alex & Taylor opt to share a room.  I do not think that we will have 1 move downstairs alone.  We have shared rooms since Tay and Dylan were 2.  Alex had her own room until almost 4 and has again since last summer.

  • KC_13KC_13
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    I didn't want to move a kid to another floor so young. 

    With that being said if sleep was affected I would have changed the plan. I also will separate them when they request it. For now they love it. It actually was tough for them to get them to sleep in separate beds for a while since they love the closeness at night.  

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  • For us I do kind of consider it a necessity.  DHs parents visit, albeit only occasionally, they are old and will visit even less if they need to get a hotel room.  We also use the lower bedroom for storage.  We really want our kids on the same floor as us until they are 3-5 years old.  We want 3 kids so I plan to have them all share until then and at that point we will divide by gender with the two getting our bigger bedroom and DH and I will move downstairs.  If by chance we have three of the same, they will all have the master and the second bedroom upstairs will probably become an office/guest room and DH and I will still move downstairs.

    To answer your question, for us it has nothing to do with closeness.  I had my own room growing up, but I don't think it's something kids are 'entitled' to.  We looked and looked and looked for a 4 bedroom house.  We also considered 3 bedroom homes with three on one level, but of course this is the house we chose - go figure! 

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  • CnAmomCnAmom
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    DS1 has trouble sleeping unless there is another human physically in his bedroom, and I think it would be easier for him if he shared a room with his brother. I'm not sure if it's a SN thing or a normal kid thing, but I wouldn't be opposed to putting them in the same room if it means that everyone gets more sleep.
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  • This isn't an issue yet, but I'm hoping to have 3 kids. We live in a two bedroom right now. It's totally conceivable that the biggest house we'll ever live in is 3 bedrooms. 4 max. So I think I'd rather use the extra bedroom as a guest room (my parents visit a lot) or an office (DH and I do enough work at home that it's sort of necessary) or a playroom. If we have 3 kids and 3 bedrooms, then I think all three will share one room and the remaining would be a guestroom/office/playroom.

    If we have 4 bedrooms, it will be tougher. Theoretically everyone could have their own room and then we'd not have a guest/office/playroom. But I don't love that idea. So either one kid will get their own room and two will share or else all three will share and we'll have a playroom and then a guest/office. I lean towards this second option because I can't think of a fair way to decide who gets their own room and who shares.

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  • We have 3 bedrooms and A LOT of toys. Probably way too many. I like having a separate room for the bulk of the toys. My sister and I shared a room until we were around 9&10 and it worked really well.

    My nephews are around 3.5 and 2 and they share really well. They can entertain each other if they wake up early. SIL didn't move them in together until #2 was STTN. LO#2 goes to bed first and then about 30 minutes later the oldest goes to sleep. They don't wake each other and they sleep really well.

    If problems arise we will adjust. 


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  • Our house setup was what convinced me to have them share to start. 2 bedrooms are upstairs and 2 are down.  It truly does not effect their sleep habits. The two rooms downstairs are a play room and an extra den/living room on the main floor which is great because they are always near by while off playing. Plus having an upstairs keeps a nice barrier so I don't have to tiptoe around when they are in bed. 

    Now they are old enough, that I could move our bedroom down and let the boys each have their own rooms but they would lose the playroom. Plus, my husband works late and usually doesn't get home until midnight so I like being on the same floor as them at night.  When my oldest starts to hit puberty in a few years and needs his own space, we will move down and lose the playroom. By then, half the toys will be able to be given up and the rest appropriately disbursed into their rooms upstairs.  I will not get rid of the family room/den because I like have an extra room with a TV where they can watch movies, play videos, etc. They will not have a tv in their bedrooms.

    CJ :-)
  • We have 3 bedrooms up and the master is down. One bedroom upstairs has it's own bathroom, like a guest suite, but not big at all. We don't want to give up the guest room yet and I don't want DD to have her own bathroom yet. DH also often uses the guest room as his office to WAH. When the girls get older they'll get their own rooms.

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  • I agree w/ whoever said that children are not entitled to their own room.  And if my five year old needs space, she finds it.  In our situation, we bought when the housing market was out of control high and we are underwater, so we are stuck in our two bedroom with three kids.  It is what it is at this point, but do plan to move to a three bedroom next year.  Parker and Rowan are 5 and 3 and it has been pretty magical.  At night they giggle and talk and I love eavesdropping on their conversations.  It's wonderful!

    Drew is just 10 months old and a tough sleeper and they never wake up when he's fussing/screaming at night.  Seriously.  Never. 

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  • image dizzykates:
    For us I do kind of consider it a necessity. nbsp;DHs parents visit, albeit onlynbsp;occasionally, they are old and will visit even less if they need to get a hotel room. nbsp;We also use the lower bedroom for storage. nbsp;We really want our kids on the same floor as us until they are 35 years old. nbsp;We want 3 kids so I plan to have them all share until then and at that point we will divide by gender with the two getting our bigger bedroom and DH and I will move downstairs. nbsp;If by chance we have three of the same, they will all have the master and the second bedroom upstairs will probably become an office/guest room and DH and I will still move downstairs.To answer your question, for us it has nothing to do with closeness. nbsp;I had my own room growing up, but I don't think it's something kids are 'entitled' to. nbsp;We looked and looked and looked for a 4 bedroom house. nbsp;We also considered 3 bedroom homes with three on one level, but of course this is the house we chose go figure!nbsp;

    Can't you give one kid their own room with a queen sized bed? That way the grandparents have somewhere to sleep when they come visit and that kid can bunk in with a sibling while they're there.
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  • Our boys have their own rooms right now, because I'm with you that a toddler and baby bunking together for no real reason sounds nutso.

    But it has crossed my mind that maybe when they are older, and they want to, that they could share and we could put desks and their book shelves in the other bedroom and it could be a place to study/do homework, etc.

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  • image EnglishMajor03:

    I agree w/ whoever said that children are not entitled to their own room.  And if my five year old needs space, she finds it.  In our situation, we bought when the housing market was out of control high and we are underwater, so we are stuck in our two bedroom with three kids.  It is what it is at this point, but do plan to move to a three bedroom next year.  Parker and Rowan are 5 and 3 and it has been pretty magical.  At night they giggle and talk and I love eavesdropping on their conversations.  It's wonderful!

    Drew is just 10 months old and a tough sleeper and they never wake up when he's fussing/screaming at night.  Seriously.  Never. 

    YUP - last nights conversation was all about who is who in mickey land.  DS2 was schooling my oldest on who pluto and goofy were. haha

    CJ :-)
  • We've got 4 bedrooms,  and our third baby on the way.

    Right now our son and daughters rooms are joined by a bathroom, so depending on the sex of this baby, one of them will move into what is currently the guest room. Our kids have double beds, so when we have company the two oldest can just sleep together, to give the bed to guests. 

    As an only child I always only had my own room. My husband always shared with someone, so while he doesn't see the harm in it, he'd also prefer they had their own space.

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  • DS1 has a vivid imagination and started thinking there were scary things in his bed. So putting DS2 in there has helped him. Plus we were at a point where they were both waking at 5:30 every morning and we didn't have much to lose so we put them together.
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  • We have a 4 bdrm house and only 2 kids- they still share a room- and will until they voice an opinion on wanting to have their own.  Then whoever wants to move gets the smallest bdrm in the house- the guest room.   Since the other bedroom is my craft/office room- I figure since DH gets the den for his man cave, and we are the ones paying the bills I get a room to myself too. Although we have discussed adding on an office space that would join the detached garage to the house.

    As for sleep, they shared a room from day one- and never woke the other up.  Now is a different story. N wakes first and wakes J, thankfully J wakes up in a good mood everyday.

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  • It won't be long before we move somewhere where Andrew can have his own room, but the girls will likely always share. Mostly because we'll likely only be able to get a 3 bedroom due to housing costs in our area. If we do get a 4 bedroom DH will use one as his office (he works from home a lot so a dedicated office would be really good for him). The girls have never not shared a room and at least for now I think they would be lost in their own rooms. When my sister and I finally got our own rooms we were always sneaking into each others rooms at night because we were too lonely.
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  • Wince we only have one none of this has happened but it is the plan to have boys share a room and girls share a room at least at some point. When we build we would like enough bedrooms for all to have their own.

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  • Our kids currently share (DD will share with the baby soon) because we have 3 bedrooms. We're looking at building a house and while it would be nice for the kids to all have their own rooms, if we can't do a playroom elsewhere, we will get two to share. We have so many shared toys that we need a communal play space.

    I think it's strange that sharing rooms has become so frowned upon. I don't think it's a big deal at all. I think it's nice to have a house with somewhere quiet to go to if you want to be alone, but the bedroom isn't the only option. 


    Owen (March 2007), Caleb (July 2009), Eliza (July 2011) and August (September 2013)




  • No, I wouldn't have my kids share a room solely to encourage closeness. Growing up together in the same house really takes care of that already. If we do have another one in this house our office will go to T and the babe would get T's room. Lol, I mentioned that to SO , that his precious computers will have to move to the living room and garage and he hadn't even thought of that. He looked so sad. We are computer nerd ppl, he builds them. 
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  • image KateB1984:

    Our kids currently share (DD will share with the baby soon) because we have 3 bedrooms. We're looking at building a house and while it would be nice for the kids to all have their own rooms, if we can't do a playroom elsewhere, we will get two to share. We have so many shared toys that we need a communal play space.

    I think it's strange that sharing rooms has become so frowned upon. I don't think it's a big deal at all. I think it's nice to have a house with somewhere quiet to go to if you want to be alone, but the bedroom isn't the only option. 

    I don't get it either. Most people I knew growing up shared a room, so I think of room sharing as standard and having your own room as either privileged or coming from a smaller family (1-2 kids). 

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  • image penguingrrl:
    image KateB1984:

    Our kids currently share (DD will share with the baby soon) because we have 3 bedrooms. We're looking at building a house and while it would be nice for the kids to all have their own rooms, if we can't do a playroom elsewhere, we will get two to share. We have so many shared toys that we need a communal play space.

    I think it's strange that sharing rooms has become so frowned upon. I don't think it's a big deal at all. I think it's nice to have a house with somewhere quiet to go to if you want to be alone, but the bedroom isn't the only option. 

    I don't get it either. Most people I knew growing up shared a room, so I think of room sharing as standard and having your own room as either privileged or coming from a smaller family (1-2 kids). 

    I hope you didn't take it as me frowning on it, because I really do not at all. I was just asking IF you had enough bedrooms for everyone to have their own but choose to have them share, the reasoning for doing so. If you have more kids than rooms of course sharing is awesome, even if you just choose it for the heck, I still think that's fine, I was just curious. 


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    Forever blessed through adoption! 7-17-11
  • We have a 3bdrm house but always planned on the girls sharing a room at some point because I think it's good for them to learn to share a space. I shared a room with all three of my sisters for several years, and I learned some valuable lessons that came in handy when I had to share a dorm room in college. My 3yo is now begging for her sister to move in with her, so we'll try it and see what happens. I'd be willing to bet they end up snuggled together in the same bed more often than not, and it makes me happy that, for now at least, they love each other enough to want that togetherness. 

    Plus moving them in together frees up the nursery to become a guest room so my craft room can be solely mine and not double as the guest room ;)

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  • image Hav=Fath:

    I hope you didn't take it as me frowning on it, because I really do not at all. I was just asking IF you had enough bedrooms for everyone to have their own but choose to have them share, the reasoning for doing so. If you have more kids than rooms of course sharing is awesome, even if you just choose it for the heck, I still think that's fine, I was just curious. 

    Oh, I know! I meant general attitudes, not yours. I talk to people who want a third child, but won't consider it unless they can move because they live in a 3 bedroom house. That's so strange to me. 

    I'm happy we'll be able to give our kids all their own rooms by the time they're teenagers, but it wouldn't change the number of kids I'd have if we couldn't.

    I just don't see it as a big deal in general. To me, other priorities for rooms are higher than avoiding sharing kids. I want a separate tv room, rather than one in the living room. In house plans, that's usually a downstairs bedroom that I'm mentally assigning as a tv room. I can think of lots of other purposes (tv room, home office, playroom) that I would rather have. Plus for families that do have an extra bedroom being used for something else, it's perfect because if ever there is an issue with kids of very different personalities struggling with sharing, you can easily change your mind. Nothing is set in stone!


    Owen (March 2007), Caleb (July 2009), Eliza (July 2011) and August (September 2013)




  • image Hav=Fath:
    image penguingrrl:
    image KateB1984:

    Our kids currently share (DD will share with the baby soon) because we have 3 bedrooms. We're looking at building a house and while it would be nice for the kids to all have their own rooms, if we can't do a playroom elsewhere, we will get two to share. We have so many shared toys that we need a communal play space.

    I think it's strange that sharing rooms has become so frowned upon. I don't think it's a big deal at all. I think it's nice to have a house with somewhere quiet to go to if you want to be alone, but the bedroom isn't the only option. 

    I don't get it either. Most people I knew growing up shared a room, so I think of room sharing as standard and having your own room as either privileged or coming from a smaller family (1-2 kids). 

    I hope you didn't take it as me frowning on it, because I really do not at all. I was just asking IF you had enough bedrooms for everyone to have their own but choose to have them share, the reasoning for doing so. If you have more kids than rooms of course sharing is awesome, even if you just choose it for the heck, I still think that's fine, I was just curious. 

    Oh, not you at all! I've come across it in real life and it baffles me. My town has a lot of 3 bedroom 1950s ranches that were a nice size to start with and everyone is buying them and adding a second story because "oh, well, we want a third kid..." as if they problem of sharing rooms is just obvious. DH had the hardest transition to college because he had never shared a room and not having his own space was really difficult for him. He liked his roommate a lot, just had trouble not having his own space. 

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