Just spent an hour or so perusing the boards for the best place to post. I suspect this might have the most understanding group for the situation. DD is 4.5. We knew from shortly after she was born (maybe before?) that we were going to be a family of 3. It was a no brainer for us -- felt fulfilled, worked well with our wanting to move and travel abroad extensively, comfortable for our house size and income and neither of us just ever had that longing desire for a big family or multiple kids. Well I got a BFP this week and can't help being extremely disappointed... in the situation, in myself, etc. We aren't in a position we can't afford a baby and there is no reason we shouldn't have one, I just really, really didn't expect or plan for this. I can't help being angry with myself for letting this happen and, while I haven't voiced my thoughts to DH I've even considered alternatives to keeping the baby. Yes I know how babies are made, and yes some extra careful planning could have prevented this -- no lectures on family planning please. I just feel like no middle class 30-something couple ever has considered giving a baby up for adoption just because it wasn't in their plans. I know in time I will love the baby and that this isn't the end of the world, but it does change everything about our future. To make matters worse my BFF has been having trouble getting PG for a while now and I feel like the biggest jerk in the world for being upset about a baby when her whole world has revolved around trying to have one for such a long time.
As a OAD, what would you do if you had a surprise pregnancy? Are there alternatives or is it a ridiculous thought when there are no extreme circumstances which prevent us from giving this baby a loving and happy home? The feelings are new and raw right now so don't be too hard on me please! Really just needed to get out how crummy I'm feeling about this.