DH and I have been together a total of 5 years and 3 out of those 5 years, DH has not worked. A little over 3 years ago, I was 7 months pregnant with my first son and DH was diagnosed with congestive heart failure and high blood pressure, which with both working together is causing his heart to grow and to work a lot harder. He had to quit his job at the time. Before I had the baby, he tried to look for a job, but had no luck. He decided to stay at home with the baby while I went to work. Everything was fine for a while, until I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. My son was 5 months old. This is where many arguments have began over him not feeling like a man because he's not working and calling me the "breadwinner" and different things like that. I have to be honest and say that I don't mind working while he stays home. I have a county job that helps us maintain to where we are comfortable and I used to work at a daycare and know a lot of the "behind the scene" things about a daycare and it makes me very skeptical about daycares period . We started to have less arguments after our daughter was born, but we now have a month old, and the arguments and comments have started again. He was, also recently denied disability because of some paperwork mishap. So, that has been another argument. All we have to do is apply again. I never want to make my husband feel less of a man but I just don't know what else to do. My biggest thing is, if he wanted to just get a part time job, his check would go towards a daycare or a babysitter. Keep in mind, there is not much he can do because of the disease. I wonder should I just agree to have him work just to ease his manhood or what? I don't know. I just don't want him to feel less of man because he's just not working. He's a good man and great father. How do I help him? Thanks in advance ladies. I take constructive criticism.