Stay at Home Moms

Is preschool necessary?

mobile:  Is preschool necessary?

So I have been working on school related work with Alex (7) and Taylor (5).  I am very disappointed with Taylor's teacher that she did not learn more.  She had minimal exposure to preschool activities prior to the school year.  Post school year, she could not identify all of her letters.  They didn't even touch on lower case letters at all.  So, after a week of working about an hour a day, I think she has letters down and is able to identify and write the smaller sight words.

I realize as Mom it is my job to work on school related stuff too even though I didn't.  This really makes me think that I can work on this stuff with Dylan and not send her to preschool.

Do you feel after a year of preschool they should know all of their letters?
Do you think that all kids should go to preschool?


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Re: Is preschool necessary?

  • I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skills-those are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
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  • I would think so, if only for socialization and to learn classroom behavior.
  • Depends on the preschool and it's philosophy. Our preschool really doesn't do much with letters/numbers. It's play-based, and more concerned with preparing kids socially rather than academically. They pretty much assume that you'll take care of the academic stuff at home, or else the kids will learn it in kindergarten. I still think it's incredibly valuable, year after year different kindergarten teachers comment to parents how kids from our school always come in so well-prepared (and they don't mean anything about knowing letters).

  • image KC_13:
    I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skills-those are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
    Yes! I agree this is the main purpose of preschool. The academics is an added bonus. I was not at all happy with what DD did not learn in pre-k. So I found a different and better pre-k for J. If I were you I would find a new preschool.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • I agree w/ everyone else - more about play, social time, gross & fine motor skills (cutting, art activites, games, etc). 

    I would think that in a 4 year old preschool class that some alphabet stuff would have been covered, but certainly not sight words or anything.

     


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    E 9.08, V 8.11, J 4.14
  • DochasDochas
    Tenth Anniversary 250 Answers 2500 Comments 100 Love Its
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    I think most people (teachers, therpaists) agree that 1 year is very important.  Here kindergarten is full day so I don't know if that's an important reason.  I was on the fence about sending our son this fall as he turns 3 in August.  But he needs more socialization than I can give him and, quite frankly, it's easier to go to preschool than to hunt down 5 days of social opportunities for him!

    As far as letters and numbers go - we do that with him.  He loves books so we take that time to "teach" him.  We also have letters and number magnets that he loves to play with.  I would not send him to a preschool that was going to sit him in a chair and make him work on things like that.  Fear of that is one of the reasons I was on the fence about preschool.

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  • image I Heart The 80s:
    And also... I need the break. I can't lie.
    Me too!
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • I'm in the minority (I also plan to homeschool, which I know isn't too popular on this board) - but I'd say it depends.

    I think as long as there are other opportunities for socialization it's ok for the parents to work with the children on academics, and then provide those social/play/class setting opportunities elsewhere.  I think homeschooling can be done very well, but I also know (from friends experiences) that it can be done very poorly.  

    I thought this was a really interesting article on well educated/not weird people homeschooling (because I only know a handful of those type of people who do it).

    http://childrensmd.org/uncategorized/why-doctors-and-lawyers-homeschool-their-children-18-reasons-why-we-have-joined-americas-fastest-growing-educational-trend/

     

    SAHM to Eli, born 11.26.11
  • image Andrewsgal:
    image I Heart The 80s:
    And also... I need the break. I can't lie.
    Me too!

    Dylan is my last "baby".  I am already going to have adjustment with 2 of the older girls in school all day. 

    We have only sent the others at 4, so I'd still have a year home with her.  I think everyone has valid points.  MIL & I were talking about this the other day so I wanted to get some unbiased opinions.

    I know that my SIL regrets not sending her DD to preschool.


  • image Diapers&Wipes:
    image KC_13:
    I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skillsthose are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
    Can I send us off on a small tangent? Can you explain more about rote memorization? When does it go from basic memorization to actual learning? Sorry if this is a dumb question.
    Really rote memorization is the basis of all learning at a young age. I will never understand why people get so riled up about it. Reading in its essence is rote memorization. Comprehension is a totally different issue, but to be able to read words on a a page is rote memorization.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • image Diapers&Wipes:
    image KC_13:
    I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skillsthose are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
    Can I send us off on a small tangent? Can you explain more about rote memorization? When does it go from basic memorization to actual learning? Sorry if this is a dumb question.

    rote memorization is essential for a school age kid who needs to learn to read and do mathematics. For a preschool age kid, skills like gross/fine motor activities, social skills, self help skills, learning to understand and use language appropriately, etc are more important skills than memorizing abc's.  

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  • Academically, I don't think preschool is necessary for kids whose parents are involved and work with them. Many of the studies that show a huge advantage for kids who attend preschool focus on low income and at risk children.

    With the move to full day K, though, I think it's important for kids to have some previous experience in a school environment.

    Edited to actually answer your questions:
    I taught preschool for years. My last classroom was ages 1.5 to 2.5 and kids new most of their letters before leaving, and we were definitely very play based. Yes, I think a 4 year old classroom should have taught them.
    And no, I don't think all kids need to go to preschool, but probably should if they'll be attending a more academic full day K.
    holz

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  • I don't send my kids to preschool to learn academics per se. I send them to learn how to get along with a group of their peers, how to listen to a teacher, how to sit in circle time and how to be away from me. Academics aren't the primary focus of preschool IMO, these other skills are. 

    And yes, I do think preschool is very important. I realize it can be pricey so I understand if a family truly cannot afford it (and by the same token cannot afford to work so their kids can attend because childcare prices are so high) but I think it's a very high priority item, so I forgo many other luxuries in order to send my kids to preschool.

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  • Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here. 

    In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.

    I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible. 

    BFP 11/29/11 MC 12/29/11
  • image penguingrrl:

    I don't send my kids to preschool to learn academics per se. I send them to learn how to get along with a group of their peers, how to listen to a teacher, how to sit in circle time and how to be away from me. Academics aren't the primary focus of preschool IMO, these other skills are. 

    And yes, I do think preschool is very important. I realize it can be pricey so I understand if a family truly cannot afford it (and by the same token cannot afford to work so their kids can attend because childcare prices are so high) but I think it's a very high priority item, so I forgo many other luxuries in order to send my kids to preschool.

    We live in a LCOL area.  3 mornings a week was $140.  Price is not the issue here.


  • image KaylaL08:

    Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here. 

    In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.

    I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible. 

    Where do you live that there are no private preschools? I don't think you have looked hard enough.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • image Arnegard:
    image penguingrrl:

    I don't send my kids to preschool to learn academics per se. I send them to learn how to get along with a group of their peers, how to listen to a teacher, how to sit in circle time and how to be away from me. Academics aren't the primary focus of preschool IMO, these other skills are. 

    And yes, I do think preschool is very important. I realize it can be pricey so I understand if a family truly cannot afford it (and by the same token cannot afford to work so their kids can attend because childcare prices are so high) but I think it's a very high priority item, so I forgo many other luxuries in order to send my kids to preschool.

    We live in a LCOL area.  3 mornings a week was $140.  Price is not the issue here.

    I didn't mean to imply it was an issue in your case, just a reason I've often heard!  And I often hear the "if you can't afford preschool go back to work" argument, which isn't always an option.

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  • I also will never understand people that don't realize that preschool is a lot more than socialization.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • image Andrewsgal:
    image Diapers&Wipes:
    image KC_13:
    I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skillsthose are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
    Can I send us off on a small tangent? Can you explain more about rote memorization? When does it go from basic memorization to actual learning? Sorry if this is a dumb question.
    Really rote memorization is the basis of all learning at a young age. I will never understand why people get so riled up about it. Reading in its essence is rote memorization. Comprehension is a totally different issue, but to be able to read words on a a page is rote memorization.

    rote memorization doesn't teach a two year old the problem solving skills to build a block tower with larger blocks in bottom or master a puzzle. Those are far more important developmental skills than memorizing the names of shapes. I agree if you're talking about a kindergartner when you're referring to a "young age" that rote memorization is vital-kids do need those skills to learn reading. I do think people get way too hung up on rote memorization with toddlers/preschoolers though. Those skills are unimportant in gauging how a child that age is developing. 

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  • image amy052006:

    image Andrewsgal:
    I also will never understand people that don't realize that preschool is a lot more than socialization.

    Define socialization though. I don't think of socialization as just getting along with peers that can be replicated in the sandbox.  

    I am thinking more like "learning the rules of society". 

    i agree with you. I was responding to the poster who said she does not think kids need preschool because she can socialize him. Socialization is way more than a play date where mommy is around.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
  • image Andrewsgal:
    image amy052006:

    image Andrewsgal:
    I also will never understand people that don't realize that preschool is a lot more than socialization.

    Define socialization though. I don't think of socialization as just getting along with peers that can be replicated in the sandbox.  

    I am thinking more like "learning the rules of society". 

    i agree with you. I was responding to the poster who said she does not think kids need preschool because she can socialize him. Socialization is way more than a play date where mommy is around.

    agreed.  

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  • image KaylaL08:

    Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here. 

    In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.

    I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible. 

    Our kids do not qualify for the public programs, but there are 2 private schools in town with preschool.  Sadly we only have about 2 other options in our town.  If someone wanted to make a mint, they'd open a new preschool.


  • image Andrewsgal:
    image KaylaL08:

    Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here. 

    In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.

    I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible. 

    Where do you live that there are no private preschools? I don't think you have looked hard enough.

    You are probably right. In the next county there are two private schools, but only one with preschool. At this school it's very expensive and there's a waiting list because spots are limited.

    When I was growing up there were a lot of church based preschools. I wouldn't be opposed to that so I might start looking around for one of those. 

    BFP 11/29/11 MC 12/29/11
  • Andrewsgal - I completely agree that socialization is way more than a playdate with mommy around.  That is absolutely NOT my definition of socialization.  
    SAHM to Eli, born 11.26.11
  • image Andrewsgal:
    image KC_13:
    I don't think preschool has anything to do with basic rote memorization skills-those are pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of preschooler development. It's learning to Socialize without mom or dad, learning classroom routine and learning to listen to an adult outside of family. I think at least one year before kindie should be mandatory if I ruled the world, lol.
    Yes! I agree this is the main purpose of preschool. The academics is an added bonus. I was not at all happy with what DD did not learn in pre-k. So I found a different and better pre-k for J. If I were you I would find a new preschool.

    This. I also haven't found a school yet that I don't have to do activities at home as well. It's just part of it.  

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  • DochasDochas
    Tenth Anniversary 250 Answers 2500 Comments 100 Love Its
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    image Andrewsgal:

    i agree with you. I was responding to the poster who said she does not think kids need preschool because she can socialize him. Socialization is way more than a play date where mommy is around.

    I think there are some kids who need less preschool. The kids who follow the instructions in all the classes, the ones who run when it's time for parachute or circle time.  Who can stand in line for 8 seconds at the register.  I don't have one of those kids.  My son is extremely social and has no trouble separating from me.  But he needs work in the other areas and 'rules of society'.  He also just needs the socialization aspect because he gets so much out of it.  So it's 2 years of preschool for us.  But I think different kids can certainly do well with 1 year.

    The public preschool that I could have tried to get into was 5 mornings and that's just too much.  So we're doing private through a church.  3 mornings a week and it's $265 a month. Ouch.

    TTC since September '08 After 2 m/c - lap for stage 3-4 endo Oct '09 Bravelle w/Ovidrel trigger - iui on 11/07 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image Arnegard:
    image KaylaL08:

    Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here. 

    In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.

    I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible. 

    Our kids do not qualify for the public programs, but there are 2 private schools in town with preschool.  Sadly we only have about 2 other options in our town.  If someone wanted to make a mint, they'd open a new preschool.

    The only obvious answer, Preschool-in-a-Box

    http://www.startapreschool.com/freecd/

    Then you could be a SAHM while making a full-time income! haha! 

    BFP 11/29/11 MC 12/29/11
  • I'm definitely in the minority here, but we never did pre-school.  My daughter is in 1st grade now (almost 2nd, just a few weeks left) and IMO, nothing has suffered from the lack of pre-school.  She socializes fine (albeit a little shy, but only when first meeting someone- just like I am), she has MANY friends, behavior in school is fantastic, she's reading on an almost 3rd grade level and has never had any issues, honestly. 

    That said, I definitely believe many kids can benefit from it.

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  • DochasDochas
    Tenth Anniversary 250 Answers 2500 Comments 100 Love Its
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    image amy052006:

    This.

    I think lots of pre-schools are structured a certain way just due to market demand -- people just need those hours of care.  Unfortunately, it has the ripple effect of making longer hours and more days more of the societal norm, to the point if your three year old "only" goes two hours a day for two days a week, they are "behind" to some people.

    Outside of his speech, my two year old is quite the "normal" boy (with evaluated proof - hah!) But at birthday parties and stuff, you can just tell he isn't in daycare. If he doesn't want to sit and play the parachaute game, he just doesn't. Why would he? He doesn't do that shiit forty hours a week. Yet more than one person has remarked on this, always followed with "I am so glad my special snowflake learned that in school".

    Listen, I am glad your kid is magna *** laude at circle time at two, but its not really developmentally appropriate. It obviously doesn't hurt, but its not critical either.

    This is actually a huge beef of mine on the WM board when people talk about how a center is ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL for child care because of "socialization". Um, your 18 month old does not need 40+ hours a week of socialization.  Not one piece of child development research back ups that claims.  There are tons of benefits to the daycare center setting, but that one is overblown.

    I so agree.  I kind of liked when he wouldn't do that stuff - because it seemed boring to me too.  Why should I be 'ashamed' at gymboree when they pull out the parachute and he sees the opportunity to have all the other toys to himself. lol And I like that he has down time when he doesn't always have kids in his face and always someone around to occupy him. I wanted him to have as much time as possible to just develop his own personality before having to march to the beat of everyone else's drum.  But when we went to the school and I saw him there - I just know it's time.  He fit right in and he's going to love it.

    And it makes me sad when people now think that they have to send their 18 month old to daycare even though they are staying home because they have become convinced the child needs it.

    TTC since September '08 After 2 m/c - lap for stage 3-4 endo Oct '09 Bravelle w/Ovidrel trigger - iui on 11/07 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image KaylaL08:
    Ok so I have seen the preschool thing discussed a lot here.nbsp;In my area all the public preschools are based on income and child's development level. As in, if you are lower income or your child has developmental delays your child can go to preschool. I suppose some day cares probably have preschool style learning but I really haven't looked into it.I personally don't think all kids should go to preschool. I do think socialization is important, so maybe find a way to get her interacting with other kids as much as possible.nbsp;
    Same here. We have 1 public preschool, 1 private, and 1 through a church. The public is income based, the private costs more than my mortgage every month, and the church based one has very limited spots. Most people that live around here, sadly, don't send their kids to preschool because the lack of options.

    I just hope when ds is old enough, we'll have more options, because as it stands, he probably won't go.
    image




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