June 2011 Moms

Terrible Twos

I always thought this was a myth, but now I believe.  The terrible twos have hit us hard the last few days.  :(  DD is doing a lot of whining, getting really frustrated when she doesn't have the words to tell us something or when she can't do something (because she physically can't or because we won't let her), telling us "no" all the time, and just plain ignoring what we say when she doesn't want to hear it!  It's exhausting for us all!

Are you all going through this too?  How do you deal with it?
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Re: Terrible Twos

  • Yes! DD loves to say "no" - she will ask for something, I will repeat it back to her, saying like "You want some milk?", after she just asked for milk and she will say "no! no milk!" Drives me bonkers! 

    She's gotten a little better about whining, we try hard not to give her something if she's whining, she has to ask nicely and say "please" first. 

    It requires a lot of patience to deal with the terrible twos I think. I just try to ignore her when she's acting out and then reward her when she's behaving. It doesn't always work, but I try.

    I am interested to hear what everyone else does though. 

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  • I feel like DD went through this a bit early because she's easier to reason with now. She was about 18 months when we hit the no phase. Gotten better over the last couple of months which coincide with her being better able to use signs and words to communicate. We taught her sign language at 6 months. I am a big proponent and will use again. 

    When something needs to be done, eg return toy to shelf when we're at the store or stop shaking sippy cup because it spills the milk (this was a big one a few months ago!) etc, I tell her so in a very matter of factly tone. I also still sign to her now. I feel like the combination of both has more impact.

    Be firm and direct. They can sense it if you're hesitant and will try to bend the rules if you let them.

    Of course there were times when nothing I said mattered. Lots of patience and distraction worked.

    Every now and then I used a non-vebal approach. I am still working on my poker face to communicate to her when I am really serious about what I'm telling her to do or not to do. They are so darn cute though. I know it isn't easy. Hang in there! It gets better!

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  • Been here for a while.  We give lots of choice and directions which seems to help. 

    Throwing a fit to go outside "Yes we can go outside after you go in to go potty"

    Throwing a fit to get into her chair at the table "dinner is almost ready please go into wash first"  if she says no then "no wash no dinner" which usually gets her to go wash up. 

    We get most of our tantrums when she really wants something.  I also use the phrase "use your words" we have a very large vocab and if she will calm down to say something then we can usually figure out what is wrong. 

    Also we don't use "no" very often unless it is for safety reasons so she has stopped telling us "no" as much since we have stopped. 

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  • yes.. all of this.. AND he CLIMBS EVERYTHING!! I opened the bathroom door the other day to find him attempting to climb the drawer knobs like a ladder. He'll move the dining room chairs around the kitchen to try to climb on the stove and get what he wants off the counter. We keep the dog kennel under the sink basin the laundry room.. He has climbed the kennel crawled into the sink and turned the HOT water on himself trying to get on top off the washer.. it's AWFUL!
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  • We hit the terrible twos around 1 1/2 and it's finally starting to get better (knock on wood).  Everything was a temper tantrum if she didn't get her way, hitting and kicking me, throwing food on the floor, and everything was "me do." After many, many timeouts (for hitting and kicking me) and lots of firm "no's" and standing our ground, plus an extended vocabulary, she is finally starting to listen and says "o'hay" without tantrums when we ask her to do things she doesn't want to do.


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  • Yes it is exhausting. Her favorite word lately is mine and stop. 

     

    I really don't know how to deal with it I'm just trying to get through the day some days.  

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