Stay at Home Moms

WDYD when you are "on death's door?"

I work PT and have nicely timed the worst sickness I think of my life (as in last night I was so sick I almost drove myself to the ER) for my day off and a day when DH absolutely cannot be out of work (he is running an injection clinic at an ortho office and there is literally no one else trained for it and 20+ patients scheduled). I called my mom who is a teacher but is retiring in 1 month and she just called back and said her principle told her it didn't matter about meetings she was supposed to attend and she is on her way over to drive me to my doctor and watch my kids until DH is home probably at 7pm tonight. I was just wondering what in the world I would do if I didn't have her to do this.

I should add... this isn't just run of the mill sick... I'm a nurse and in my head know I could very well end up being sent to the hospital from my MD office and there is just no way I could function at home with my kids in any way today and I do not have a big network of SAHM friends - just a couple who both have infants and my DD2 is also sick so I couldn't expose them to her.

What do other SAHMs do when this sick? Obviously it doesn't happen often... just had me thinking.  


DD1 7/10/08  DD2 8/11/10  DS 7/2/13

Re: WDYD when you are "on death's door?"

  • My parents or my aunt help out when I'm really sick or DH does. Hope you feel better! It's great that your mom can come help!
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  • The one time I was seriously sick dh stayed home for two days. On the third day when he needed to go back in to get stuff done he dropped the kids off at my moms on the way in and picked them up on his way home.

    hope you feel better soon! 

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  • kmc217kmc217
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Combo Breaker

    It is a respiratory issue-- I have asthma that has been tricky this pregnancy and I caught my girls' virus and now have horrible burning chest, nonstop barking cough and can barely hold my head up. I'm certain I need breathing treatments and steroids but not sure what will be baby-safe. As an added bonus I have an irritable uterus this pregnancy and my constant coughing fits are triggering massive contractions. I am so grateful for my mom. My dad used to be my go-to and it's been hard since he passed away. We don't have a ton of family nearby.


    DD1 7/10/08  DD2 8/11/10  DS 7/2/13

  • I don't even know. My mom's a 3 hour drive away, she'd do it if she could... The one time I had a horrible stomach virus and DH was on duty, she was on vacation. We all just kind of parked in front of the TV and rode it out, but it wasn't pretty.

    This is why I need to find a good babysitter around here.

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  • I'd lay on the couch as they watched TV/played.  I have plenty of friends but probably wouldn't call.

  • caybehcaybeh
    2500 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Third Anniversary

    image Arnegard:
    I'd lay on the couch as they watched TV/played.  I have plenty of friends but probably wouldn't call.

    This! My H started a new job last Dec, so he doesn't have a lot of vacation time saved up yet. At his last job, he had so much time saved up that he would just stay home if I needed him too.

    Hope you feel better soon! 

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  • Dh would have to help or I would be on my own.  I don't have anyone else to ask.
  • My DH also cannot easily get out of work many times, so when I was very ill recently, I called my mom on a whim. She works full-time, but dropped everything to come take DS for the day. I am lucky! I know friends who just have to suck it up and lay on the couch while their LOs (hopefully) play quietly.


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  • image ToBeMrsT:
    Dh would have to help or I would be on my own. nbsp;I don't have anyone else to ask.

    This. This has not been a good week in this house. DH couldn't take off work and DD, DS, and I were all sick. Luckily they slept longer than usual since they were sick also.
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  • Being military, I have always cultivated reciprocity relationship with a handful of friends.  

    From scheduled monthly babysitting to emergency sitting and even shopping trips.  

    Since we retired, I have continued this trend (we are a 5 hour flights away from our nearest relative).  So far I have only had to use it once, but have offered up my home a handful of times.  

  • NandaBNandaB
    5000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Third Anniversary
    Do you have a regular babysitter that you would trust? Now might be a good time to call her and ask if she could be your emergency help. Hopefully there won't be a next time, but just in case...

    Hope you are feeling better soon!
    G: 5/8/11
    N: 4/8/13
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  • Thankfully I haven't run into this situation yet.  I have a few SAHM friends in the neighborhood who (hopefully) could watch DD if I needed them too.

    Today I am watching twins for a mom friend (she's a teacher) who's babysitter quit yesterday.  She has 8 days left of school and her inlaws can only watch the kids 6 of those days so I stepped in for the other 2.  There was no way she could get time off work this late in the school year and her husband is out of town for work.

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  • GastroGastro
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    I hope you feel better soon. My parents usually helps me out when I'm sick. They travel a lot though so then it would be DH or my BBF's mom in a pinch.
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  • That sounds scary, hope you are feeling better soon!

    My parents and MIL are all retired and live about 20-30 minutes away so if I really need  help I call them. Otherwise DS gets a lot of TV and iPad time. There was once I was so sick that I locked DS and I in my bedroom with the ipad and a bunch of toys & books and laid down and slept. 

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  • khill86khill86
    1000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Either DH would stay home if it was possible or I'd ask MIL to pick up DS or have DH bring DS to MIL on his way to work.

    If MIL was away or couldn't watch DS, I'd go to their house anyway. They live right beside DH's work, so at the very, very least DH could check on me every once in a while and bring DS into the office for the ladies to visit with him for an hour. Ha!
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  • I ride it out. My friends kids are now in school and between pickups and activities they just aren't available. My family is in another state. And my MIL doesn't drive on highways.

    I have a tent that I refer to as the "migraine tent" because it only comes out when I need it. We curl up inside and watch tv or she reads to me while I doze or we have snacks. I dunno... even with a full blown migraine and vomiting we've always managed.

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  • My whole family pitches in.  Usually it is DH taking the day off work and watching the kids, but one of the last times my Adenomyosis sent pain radiating through my body, DH was in Texas for work.  I called my Dad, who took DD to school.  He called my uncle to sit with me and watch DS until he got back, and then my dad came back and watched DS until my mom could leave work.  My MIL came down when my mom had to return to work for the afternoon...  If my parents are unavailable, I still have my Grandpa (and his girlfriend), and my two cousins, but I rarely get that desperate.
  • Spin313Spin313
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its
    My parents are both retired. When I had gallbladder surgery, they both helped out...especially my mom! If I was really sick, I know I could ask for their help.

  • Either my H stays home or one of our parents takes A for the day.

    If neither of those is an option, I just turn on the TV, throw cereal, milk, and pouches at him, and wait for death.


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  • Unfortunately I usually just have to do whatever I can to make it through the day...usually involving the kids watching tv/movies all day.  We got the stomach bug twice this winter while dh was out of town...and of course both the kids were on the mend and ready to be running around again by the time I got it.  The one horrible day I had it, I pretty much couldn't move from the bathroom all morning, and dd just sat next to the toilet screaming at me because she wanted up.
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  • We are incredibly lucky to live super close to a very supportive family AND have amazing friends.  The only time my H has ever taken off work to take care of me/the kids was in the last few weeks when I was in the hospital for PTL.  He works over an hour from home and it's pretty hard for him to get off.  The only time he will even stay home when he's sick is if he's pretty close to dying.

    My parents and sister live 2 miles away from us.  My sister works full time and goes to school but is always there if I need her.  My dad is on the road a lot (he owns a trucking company) and sometimes my mom goes with him but if she's home she can be to my house within minutes.  This has been really helpful the last month since I've been on bed rest.

    My ILs live 20 mins away and are there whenever we need them.  I was in the hospital Sunday-Tuesday last week and my parents were out of town.  FIL came at 10:30 on Sunday night to watch the boys so I could go to L&D.  He stayed the night with them then took Monday off of work to watch them.  MIL took Tuesday off and they kept the boys at their house Monday night.  Since then it has been a rotation of them, my mom, and my sister watching the kids.  

    My BFF and I also take care of each other's kids if need be.  Her 9 month old was in the children's hospital 2 months ago with pneumonia so I traded off with her parents watching her older two kids while she was in the hospital for a week.  She is going to take my kids tomorrow to give my mom a break! 

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  • If I really can't do it on my own MH can usually stay home.  If not, I have family in the area as well as SAHM friends.  I wouldn't want them to be exposed to my LO's illness, but if I were so sick that it were an emergency situation I'm sure I would be able to work out coverage.  I know I would take their sick kids if I had to.
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