March 2012 Moms

separation anxiety!

Anyone else dealing with this? How do you do it?

Ever since I found out I was pregnant, DS has been glued to me! I am not exaggerating, he fights, screams, throws himself, if I put him down, leave the room, don't let him sleep on me. Surprisingly, he is completely fine when we drop him off at daycare, he doesn't cry or anything.  He goes with teacher and plays with kids.

But when we are home...it's a nightmare! He's not falling asleep on his own in crib anymore.  He wants to literally be on me..even if he falls asleep on my shoulder, second I put him down, tantrum begins. I can't get ready, clean, cook, go to bathroom...nothing without him having a fit because I am not carrying him. And honestly I just can't carry him all the time, even thought he is a peanut, it's tiring. And I don't want him to get used to be carried all the time either.

What do you all do? Do you just let LO cry? I don't even know how to handle this, he's never been like this before. Within the past month it feels like he's getting worst!

TIA

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Re: separation anxiety!

  • Dd started this at night too. I put her down and walk away. If she doesn't settle down in 15 min I go back in and pat her back but don't pick her up. During the day I either ignore or redirect depending on what I am doing.
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    BFP #2 7/18/11 - EDD 3/29/12 - Born 3/13/12
    BFP #1 4/4/11 - Natural M/C - 7w1d - 4/30/11
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  • image MrsJetSet:
    Dd started this at night too. I put her down and walk away. If she doesn't settle down in 15 min I go back in and pat her back but don't pick her up. During the day I either ignore or redirect depending on what I am doing.

    So last night I tried to letting him cry in crib..he's hysterical, having a huge a fit.  He won't even lie down so I can pat his back, he just keeps getting up screaming and reaching for me. Do I leave the room and let him cry alone or stay in the room but don't pick him up.

     We've never done sleep training, because we never really needed to.  He's been a good sleeper up until about couple months ago, and it's getting worst.  Think I need to do some hard core sleep training.

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  • When we first did sleep training we left the room entirely. Based on your description though it might be easier to sit in the room but not touching DS for a few nights then go to leaving the room entirely.

    This whole parenting thing is hard!!
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    BFP #2 7/18/11 - EDD 3/29/12 - Born 3/13/12
    BFP #1 4/4/11 - Natural M/C - 7w1d - 4/30/11
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  • It is hard, and I am getting really nervous with baby #2.  I have 7 months to get DS sleep trained and in the crib.

    I hope this separation anxiety is a phase. DH trying so hard to help out but morning and nights DS doesn't want anyone but me.

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  • DS does this to us still sometimes. I let him cry, which only last for a couple minutes. Whatever you do, pick something and stick with it so he doesn't get confused.
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  • image Mrs MoJoRisin:
    DS does this to us still sometimes. I let him cry, which only last for a couple minutes. Whatever you do, pick something and stick with it so he doesn't get confused.

    ok definitely! thanks

     

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  • image MrsJetSet:
    When we first did sleep training we left the room entirely. Based on your description though it might be easier to sit in the room but not touching DS for a few nights then go to leaving the room entirely.

    This whole parenting thing is hard!!

    I agree with this. The first few nights will be hard, but it should get better after that.
    For day time, I agree with redirecting or just letting him cry when you really need to put him down. With my LO, he's only extra clingy if he's hungry, uncomfortable, or tired. Could your guy be going through a growth spurt? Teething? Maybe you could sub some of the carrying time with snuggling on the couch or reading books. GL, I hope it's a phase that passes soon!
  • image rocknrollfriend:
    image MrsJetSet:
    When we first did sleep training we left the room entirely. Based on your description though it might be easier to sit in the room but not touching DS for a few nights then go to leaving the room entirely. This whole parenting thing is hard!!
    I agree with this. The first few nights will be hard, but it should get better after that. For day time, I agree with redirecting or just letting him cry when you really need to put him down. With my LO, he's only extra clingy if he's hungry, uncomfortable, or tired. Could your guy be going through a growth spurt? Teething? Maybe you could sub some of the carrying time with snuggling on the couch or reading books. GL, I hope it's a phase that passes soon!

    Yes, we definitely been spending more time in bed or on the sofa playing with toys or reading books. The last two nights I had to work late..so DH picked him up, did dinner, playtime, bath, then sleep...DS did not give him any problems at all..went to sleep just fine ay 730pm, slept in the crib all night. It's just me LOL

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  • Nicb13Nicb13
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    image MariJ1008:

    image rocknrollfriend:
    image MrsJetSet:
    When we first did sleep training we left the room entirely. Based on your description though it might be easier to sit in the room but not touching DS for a few nights then go to leaving the room entirely. This whole parenting thing is hard!!
    I agree with this. The first few nights will be hard, but it should get better after that. For day time, I agree with redirecting or just letting him cry when you really need to put him down. With my LO, he's only extra clingy if he's hungry, uncomfortable, or tired. Could your guy be going through a growth spurt? Teething? Maybe you could sub some of the carrying time with snuggling on the couch or reading books. GL, I hope it's a phase that passes soon!

    Yes, we definitely been spending more time in bed or on the sofa playing with toys or reading books. The last two nights I had to work late..so DH picked him up, did dinner, playtime, bath, then sleep...DS did not give him any problems at all..went to sleep just fine ay 730pm, slept in the crib all night. It's just me LOL

    DS only acts that way with me too. He's been very clingy for a couple months now. He smacks at dad and only wants me, especially when he's sick or tired. Luckily he sleeps great at night though.

    During the day, when DS is stuck to me like glue, I really just try to keep him busy and occupied. I don't have the heart to let him cry while I walk away to start a load of laundry so I keep him with me. I'm not worried about spoiling him, I just want him happy and if that's attached to my hip, then so be it.

    I find that I can distract him with toys or something else, even just temporarily so I  can get some stuff done without having to carry him.

    Hang in there and GL!

     

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    DS born 3/10/12 - Baby GIRL - due 10/5/14!

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