We're in a rather unique situation in that DH has a FT position while I have a scholarship to work on my PhD dissertation. It has really been a huge blessing, allowing me to have kids and stay home with them while still contributing significantly to our budget (I work on the dissertation PT when our nanny comes and when DH is at home). I'm nearing the end, however, and in the past 2 years since having DD1, I have come to realize that I am simply not cut out to be a SAHM. I want to work. We could live on DH's salary. We wouldn't be able to afford many extras, but we would be ok.
Still, I don't want to. I really, really, really want to work. It's not even the money aspect. It's that I feel very resentful when all childcare matters are on my shoulders (if I want to work, I have to figure out how to get free time to do it) and, while I dearly love my children, I want to work. I wish I could feel satisfied staying at home with them all day, but I don't.
I'm sincerely hoping I'm not the only one here. Does anyone else feel the same? I should add that it probably makes a difference knowing that I don't have to send my kids to daycare after only getting 6 or 12 weeks at home with them, and that when I work it most likely won't be FT, so I'll still get time with the girls. Still, I really need that PT time away from them.