March 2013 Moms

Fussy baby and development

I feel like DD is either sleeping or fussing. She has her times when she smiles and interacts with us and when I can stick her in her play mat but a lot of our day is spent soothing her. As a result, I feel like she's not getting the chance to work on her milestones. She HATES tummy time so her head control isn't all that great. Since she cries a lot, she's not cooing much. That sort of thing. I look back on what DS was doing at this age and at other babies her age and they all seem to play more and interact more. I feel like DD is still like a newborn where a lot of our day is spent rocking and shh-ing her. I know I shouldn't compare babies and they all develop in their own time and I don't have that mommy gut feeling that anything is wrong with her, but I guess I was just looking to see if any other mamas of fussy babies feel the same way. Thanks ladies!

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Re: Fussy baby and development

  • Have you tried wearing her?  It counts as tummy time and there's the added bonus that she'll probably be less fussy if she feels like your holding her, and you can still chase after your DS :)

    My DD isn't fussy, but she's very serious and isn't a coo-er or very smiley either.  DS was really fussy, I read somewhere that babies that cried a lot had better problem solving skills as toddlers, but wasn't able to find the study again :(


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  • mnj05mnj05
    250 Answers Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its

    DS falls asleep during tummy time so since about a month old we roll him up to a sitting position while holding his hands/arms after every diaper change. We stay like that for no more than a few seconds but now he can do that for a minute easy. We also just sit him on our laps and position our hands under his arms and supporting his chest and back. He's got pretty good head control now and when we hold him on our shoulder, he lifts his head and doesn't wobble too much.

    Now that he doesn't fall asleep during tummy time, he is starting to lift his head when he's on the floor, but not pushing up yet.

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  • My LO was really fussy when I was EBF.  I couldn't walk away for a second because if his pacifier fell out he'd start to scream.  It turned out that he wasn't getting enough breast milk.  We started to give him formula and it changed his life.  He went from super crabby to super happy.  He still HATES tummy time, but it has gotten better.  I am sure that you have checked into it, but I thought i'd share my experience.
  • DS#1 was the crankiest little thing. I never did tummy time, just did whatever kept him from crying. He sat at 5 months, crawled at 8, walked at 10.5. Now he's 2.5, talks better than my 5yo niece, and is smart as can be. I was so worried the first few months that I was stunting his development because I couldn't really interact with him, and do the things I was "supposed" to be doing.


  • DH thinks DD2 is really fussy, even throws around the term colic at times. Its true we BF a lot...but babies have a lot of growing to do. I have found early am DD is happiest to try new things or if her sister is busy...I think sister overstimulates. I've also found this baby seems fussy if she's bored, too. Sometimes if I change rooms she calms down. Sometimes babies get fussy when working on new skills, too... almost like they mentally try to figure them out. They all get there in their own time....unless pediatrician sees an issue I wouldn't be too concerned.
  • There are some days that I feel that way. Some days I have a happy little coo-monster and some days he is just not happy with the world and I am lucky if I get one smile out of him all day. I tell myself that he is learning and having all new perceptions/sensations that can be very overwhelming for him, making him fussier some days.

    Hopefully once our LO get things more figured out and things settle down they will be less fussy in general. 

    As for tummy time, my little guy actually loves it for some reason. He tries so hard to wiggle and kick his legs to move around, I think I am going to have an early crawler. He also loves when we lean back as we are sitting and put him on our chests tummy down. He pushes up with his arms and looks at us and looks around. He also pushes up with his legs so he is kind of working on standing. Loves it!

  • I agree that oyu could try wearing  DD. I didn't start tummy time really until 6-7 weeks, and at 10 weeks she holds her head up steady for a good amount of time.  She practices every chance she gets! In the sling she'll push off me and look around, in the bath (I bath with her when she's being cranky) she'll lift her head and even when  I'm holding her she'll try and push off my chest to look. 

    And she's not too fussy, but I do think a large part is because I spent her fussiest weeks wearing her (I wore her the most weeks 6-8). She enjoyed the contact during those times, but as she gets older she seems to prefer being by herself so I give her plenty of time in her activity mat, bouncer, under her mobile, etc.

      As far as stimulating-listen, as a culture we put a big emphasis on stimulation.  In other cultures where they wear babies, those babies get stimulated in the wrap because they can see, hear, and observe what you do!  But also, some other cultures put a bigger emphasis on rest and relaxation for babies (there are other countries wehre babies spent 2-3 more hours a day sleeping than ours, other countries where babies cry on average maybe 15-30 minutes where as the average for the US is 2-3 hours) and not stimulation. Your baby is fine, and her development isn't stunted by being fussy. I would really invest in a wrap though, you will free your hands up, baby will probably fuss less AND she'll get stimulated.

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  • MSW_721MSW_721
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Comments Combo Breaker
    Thanks for the replies and encouragement! It's really helped me feel better and put things in perspective. I do have a carrier and I wear her a lot. And sometimes since she's worn quite a bit it again makes me feel like I'm not "stimulating" her enough. But I need to remember that right now, she might just need extra cuddles and the rest will come later!

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