Multiples

Seriously Considering #4.. thoughts?

I just turned 30, Boys just turned 2, Khloe is about to turn 4.. DH & I are thinking now or never.. & our biggest fear is the first 6 months.. lol. We don't want the kids later in our 30's or 40's because we don't want them that spread out. No offense, there are beautiful mommies in their 40's, I just want to be in a different stage at that point in my life. With 3 little ones now, I want to be in the soccer game, girl scouts, camping, etc. stage with all of my kids closer in age. We were a little traumatized by the infant stage with the twins because they had colic, thrush, jaundice, trouble latching, trouble with formula, a week in NICU, every cold that went around.. I guess I'm just looking for opinions. :) TIA
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Re: Seriously Considering #4.. thoughts?

  • mirnbmirnb
    250 Answers Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 25 Love Its
    member
    Its a personal choice but it you're both on board go for it! We were also traumitized in he beginning but are over it now and ready for #3....I think the beginning is hard no matter what and if you survived colic x2 you can do anything! Best of luck in your decision!
  • If we could afford it we would definitly have 4 kids. I say go for it!
  • No real advice, since I only have my twins and this is such a personal decision, but as I read your post I thought of something I've heard from a couple of wise people: When you're deciding whether or not to have more children, don't make the decision based on the first 6-12 months. Make the decision based on how many people you want at the Thanksgiving table in 20 years. Those first six months are so intense, and so, so tough, but they're also incredibly fleeting in your life and the life of your children.  Also, with all luck you'd have a singleton next time, which makes things easier :)

    Good luck with your decision! I'm very torn about whether or not we should have another child (or more) after the twins. 

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  • image shaunah816:
    No real advice, since I only have my twins and this is such a personal decision, but as I read your post I thought of something I've heard from a couple of wise people: When you're deciding whether or not to have more children, don't make the decision based on the first 612 months. Make the decision based on how many people you want at the Thanksgiving table in 20 years. Those first six months are so intense, and so, so tough, but they're also incredibly fleeting in your life and the life of your children. nbsp;Also, with all luck you'd have a singleton next time, which makes things easier :Good luck with your decision! I'm very torn about whether or not we should have another child or more after the twins.nbsp;


    Love those words of wisdom! Thanks!!! That's a great way to look at it.
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  • kiwi443kiwi443
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    member

    I think you're crazy ;). Our family feels complete with 3.

    Honestly though, if you are up for it, go for it! Like others said, it'll be tough when they're young, but so worth it down the road.

    J - 9/6/09 L and A - 1/17/12
  • PP is absolutely right. Think of what your later years look like and plan accordingly. I want a house busting to the seams at the holidays, adult children calling me, grandkids everywhere and a life of wonderful big family memories. 

     And really, we are having SO much fun with 5 very young kids. We just laugh and laugh, and this house is just nothing but chaos and cuddles. I've never heard anyone say they regret having so many kids. :-) 

     Go for it - these years pass so quickly, and before you know it the "hard" work will be over.  

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  • if you're both in agreement I agree about going for it! I go back and forth on one more, DH is convinced we're done. 

    And didn't they just come out with the study that said 3 kids is the most stressful? they said 4 or more you don't doubt your  parenting as much and you also don't over schedule yourself because you're more realistic about what you can do. 

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  • image sweetsugarmama:

    if you're both in agreement I agree about going for it! I go back and forth on one more, DH is convinced we're done. 

    And didn't they just come out with the study that said 3 kids is the most stressful? they said 4 or more you don't doubt your  parenting as much and you also don't over schedule yourself because you're more realistic about what you can do. 

    All of your answers were so good & supportive :) Thank you all!!

     

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  • If you're both for it then do it! I am still in the newborn stage and I will say, it's not for me. But I know it gets easier and I already want a 3rd. My SO, not so much. If I could get him on board then I would jump at the chance....in a few years at least lol.
  • image JesseKhloe&Me:
    I just turned 30, Boys just turned 2, Khloe is about to turn 4.. DH & I are thinking now or never.. & our biggest fear is the first 6 months.. lol. We don't want the kids later in our 30's or 40's because we don't want them that spread out. No offense, there are beautiful mommies in their 40's, I just want to be in a different stage at that point in my life. With 3 little ones now, I want to be in the soccer game, girl scouts, camping, etc. stage with all of my kids closer in age. We were a little traumatized by the infant stage with the twins because they had colic, thrush, jaundice, trouble latching, trouble with formula, a week in NICU, every cold that went around.. I guess I'm just looking for opinions. :) TIA

     

    I feel the same way as you, I want to be able to be in close stages with my kids when I'm late 30's (just turned 31). Our boys will be 3 in September, and 2 months later #3 will be born.  It's going to be hard for a while, but, I can't imagine waiting until they are 5+ and being nearly 35 to try for #3. I am just not getting any younger! lol ;)  I say if you guys  are both wanting to try, then try:)

    God gave me a double portion for my inheritance with my little Mighty men :) 9/19/10 Baby A born at 1:47 am 6lbs 14oz, 20.5inches long. Baby B born at 3:20 am 6lbs 6oz, 19.5inches long. My double blessing!:)
    image
  • image shaunah816:

    No real advice, since I only have my twins and this is such a personal decision, but as I read your post I thought of something I've heard from a couple of wise people: When you're deciding whether or not to have more children, don't make the decision based on the first 6-12 months. Make the decision based on how many people you want at the Thanksgiving table in 20 years. Those first six months are so intense, and so, so tough, but they're also incredibly fleeting in your life and the life of your children.  Also, with all luck you'd have a singleton next time, which makes things easier :)

    Good luck with your decision! I'm very torn about whether or not we should have another child (or more) after the twins. 

    Love this! I say go for it. Don't base a decision on the crazy hard days, base it on whether you would regret NOT having that other child(ren). 

    Wife. MoM {1G + BBG triplets}. DIY'er. Cloth Diaper'er.

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