February 2013 Moms

Sex drive

Mine is very low. Between being exhausted and csection tenderness, it's tough. Please tell me I'm not the only one. And STMs please tell me it comes back.
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Re: Sex drive

  • After pregnancy, mine is always high.  But during my last two pregnancies, it was nonexistent, so IMO, it will return.  
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  • Sex drive?  What's that?  Sex?  Should we have had that by now?  I didn't get the memo.

    Seriously.  No drive.  No sex yet.  I just started to be able to sit on the floor with the kids without squealing from pain from all the tears and cuts and stitches and then, bam, I started my period.  My poor, poor DH.  However, he doesn't seem too eager either.  We are both dead tired and he's working nights.  And yes, it does come back.  How do you think the STMs all ended up with second time children? Wink

     

     

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  • Do you have an SO? I'll trade you!

    Seriously. 

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  • image Runaway22:

    Do you have an SO? I'll trade you!

    Seriously. 

     

    Ditto, kind of. I have one, kind of, maybe, sort of. We're still in a weird grey area here where we're planning for the future, but they're oddly tentative plans when they should be absolute plans regarding living situations and whatnot. 

    But if we didn't have 1000 miles between us, my drive is more like hyperdrive currently. It's awful because there's no outlet. Sorry for the TMI, lol 

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  • No sex drive here. I'm hoping it comes back after I'm done breastfeeding.
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  • image PnkDingo:
    image Runaway22:

    Do you have an SO? I'll trade you!

    Seriously. 

    Ditto, kind of. I have one, kind of, maybe, sort of. We're still in a weird grey area here where we're planning for the future, but they're oddly tentative plans when they should be absolute plans regarding living situations and whatnot. 

    But if we didn't have 1000 miles between us, my drive is more like hyperdrive currently. It's awful because there's no outlet. Sorry for the TMI, lol 

    Yeah, it's bad. And inconvenient! Honestly, I don't know which is worse... Too little or too much, lol   :/

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  • I still haven't had sex since October.  I think I'm officially celibate now. 
  • MBush4MBush4
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    Csection mom here and yeah, I have no drive. AT ALL. But we've done it three times since DS was born. The first about a month go an the two times this week. It was DH's birthday. ; but in all honesty, once we started I sort of got into it, as horrible as it sounds.

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  • Are you BFing?  BFing hormones kind of kill your sex drive.  
    Missed m/c discovered 3/15/12 at 8w2d: "Henry."
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  • After my DH made a sad comment about our intimacy disappearing, I've made a serious effort to do the deed with him twice a week. Of course, I didn't tell him that I'm scheduling sexy time and I try to make it seem spontaneous. Even though I have no interest in the actual act, it's made him a lot happier and made us closer again.

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  • This is great and what I should be attempting, too. OP, you're not alone. We have tried once since baby, and only got 1/2 way there (it hurt, was awkward, baby woke up, etc, so no one finished) and haven't tried since. I'm just tired and have no desire... hoping this passes soon. 
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  • akp0709akp0709
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    image ByeByeBooze:
    After my DH made a sad comment about our intimacy disappearing, I've made a serious effort to do the deed with him twice a week.

    Same here!

    I didn't know that BF could be the culprit, thanks for the information ladies! :) 

    "Always remember there was nothing worth sharing like the love that let us share our name"

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  • Yeah mine has been pretty low but we've been scheduling a date night once a week (MIL watches little man) and that helps.

    I'm not tender, for me it's pure exhaustion. It sounds unromantic but scheduling a day helps you get back in the groove.

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  • I've got one after a glass of wine :)
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  • image WinterBenson:
    I've got one after a glass of wine :


    Lol love it!

    I read a lot of romance novels...
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  • image MBush4:
    Csection mom here and yeah, I have no drive. AT ALL. But we've done it three times since DS was born..

    Me exactly, we've done it three times too.  In addition to no drive, it still hurts like heck.  I wasn't expecting it to after a c/s, but it's bad!!!  I'm trying for DH's sake, but it's hard when all I want to do at night is put on sweats and crash into bed the second DS goes to sleep

  • I am not BFing and I still have zero drive. In fact, DH asked today and I flat out said, "No." To which he flat out replied back, "There's a word I'm getting pretty sick of hearing." What's worse, is I don't have an "excuse." It's not painful, I'm all healed up. I just don't feel like it.  It's sad because that was sort of something that made DH and I "us" so to speak. It was always healthy and mutually pleasurable. Now it feels like something I do out of obligation. Hopefully things swing back around soon.
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  • Glad I'm not alone!! And yes I am BFing. Didn't realize that could be the reason. Good to know. Thanks!!
    "Sweat is my sanity". Sarah Palin "Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised". Proverbs 31:30 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I finally got my groove back and TMI = I recommend that ky his and hers stuff. I think the reason it hurts while BF is dryness and the lube helps, the ky his and hers has some kind of menthol stuff that is kind of fun made us giggle which helped me relax.
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  • Week four my sex drive was high. Now most of the time I couldn't care less about sex, then sometimes I really want it. But its hard with the baby because she rarely sleeps or naps on her own. When the mood is on and the timing right, our little interrupter usually wakes up.
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  • image Runaway22:
    image PnkDingo:
    image Runaway22:

    Do you have an SO? I'll trade you!

    Seriously. 

    Ditto, kind of. I have one, kind of, maybe, sort of. We're still in a weird grey area here where we're planning for the future, but they're oddly tentative plans when they should be absolute plans regarding living situations and whatnot. 

    But if we didn't have 1000 miles between us, my drive is more like hyperdrive currently. It's awful because there's no outlet. Sorry for the TMI, lol 

    Yeah, it's bad. And inconvenient! Honestly, I don't know which is worse... Too little or too much, lol   :/


    Yep I'm in this boat too! Ugh it sucks! Sometimes I consider giving in when Luke's dad comes to see him so far Ive been strong enough to resist those baby blue eyes...
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