January 2013 Moms

FFFC

hadn't been started yet...thought i'd go

this is super hot button but i thought i'd just say it...don't forget FFFC!

i don't understand or believe in the family bed or co-sleeping. i just don't see how it makes a difference or what the point is.

i do feel that my children do come first and marriage second or at least 50/50 BUT...i don't think my sons and i would be any closer or have a stronger relationship if we slept together. I feel like my marriage would suffer because of it.

and with cosleeping I guess it's so you can sleep and feed but i don't think it's safe to BF while i get to sleep nor would i imagine I'd actually sleep well while I'm  BF in case I'd suffocate LO... 

just my opinion! 

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Re: FFFC

  • In my opinion, there'd be no sex AND no sleep!  Definite relationship-damaging if you ask me.
  • I think people with this opinion probably haven't had a higher needs baby or one that really needed contact to sleep early on ;) 

    With that said, neither have I and although I DO see benefits to be sharing, I prefer not to have my babies sleep in my bed.  We do co-sleep (room share) for a good amount of time though.  

    Some people sleep just fine with their babies in the bed and you can definitely have sex places other than your bed.  Just so ya know :P

    My confession is: I never have good confessions and I wish I did.  I feel lame for never really participating in FFFC threads.

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  • We bed share. We practice safe methods ...no pillows , blankets etc. Both my kids sleep better when close. And DD reversed cycled for 9 months when I went back to work. Frankly working 60 hour weeks on average, sleeping is about the only time I get M to F
    Our relationship is stronger than ever ..we will celebrate our 6th anniversary Sunday. And we are intimate often, sometimes in the bed if DS is still in his crib , other places if not.
    DD had no issues transitioning at a year.

  • Before I conceived and during my pregnancy I was in 100% agreement with you. I'm still not a fan of the 'family bed' and DS will be in his own bed/room when he's a year old.

    That said, I LOVE co-sleeping right now. The first two months I did it out of necessity and was scared to do it at first. I practice safe co-sleeping habits and have learned to trust myself and my LO to be safe. I very easily fall asleep during BFing. Here's what happens. I go to sleep with DS sleeping in his PnP next to the bed, he wakes and cries to eat, I pull him into bed, give him a boob and angle him/me so that he can breathe, go back to sleep. If I don't fall asleep before he's done I put him back in his own bed, if I do fall asleep while he's eating I wake up on my own a few hours later and put him back or he wakes me up wanting to eat again.

    My FFFC is a big one: Twice while using the co-sleeper instead of the PnP I had fallen asleep with DS in his co-sleeper and woken to him asleep next to me. I don't remember the pulling him into bed and nursing steps. Sleep nursing, auto pilot, or just not remembering details (like can sometimes happen when you're driving)? I don't know, but it was kinda scary. Glad DS outgrew the co-sleeper and is in the PnP now. It's a little more work to pull him into bed but that means I'm AWAKE to do it.

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  • Oh yay, I was going to start this!

     R has been grumpy all day, it is still really warm and she only napped for maybe 45 min so far in the grocery store, that was over 3 hours ago. I finally got her to nap in the moby but because it is so warm I wanted to take her out and put her in her room, the coolest room. I got her in there then grabbed a shower. Our bathroom is literally 4 steps from her room. Is that bad? 

    I really need to clean my house, it is a disaster but I am sitting her, bumping, eating a salad and drinking an iced coffee. Oh and rocking out to Britney Spears. That part is embarrassing.  

    I am on my 5th load of laundry though.

    I had spaghetti for breakfast yesterday.

    Sometimes I fake sleeping when DH is off so he will get up with R first and change her, then bring her to me to eat.

    ETA: R is in the crib with the monitor on.  

     

  • I have never sterilized anything for DS2.

    I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.

    He still sleeps in his swing (usually turned off) most nights.

    He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a non-napper.

    He spits up so often that I don't even think twice about what I wipe him up with. My hand, my shirt, his blanket.  We end up with a lot of laundry. 

     

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  • image MasonMama:
    I have never sterilized anything for DS2. I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.He still sleeps in his swing usually turned off most nights.He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a nonnapper.He spits up so often that I don't even think twice about what I wipe him up with. My hand, my shirt, his blanket. nbsp;We end up with a lot of laundry.nbsp;nbsp;


    I've occasionally not washed clothes too, but after having dealt with thrush the past 6 weeks, going through nystatin and diflucan and still can't get rid of it, you bet your bottom dollar I'll be sanitizing every single bottle and nipple we get from now on. No flames, just advice. :]
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  • BLPL101BLPL101
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    image Hollylb3:
    image MasonMama:
    I have never sterilized anything for DS2. I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.He still sleeps in his swing usually turned off most nights.He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a nonnapper.He spits up so often that I don't even think twice about what I wipe him up with. My hand, my shirt, his blanket. nbsp;We end up with a lot of laundry.nbsp;nbsp;
    I've occasionally not washed clothes too, but after having dealt with thrush the past 6 weeks, going through nystatin and diflucan and still can't get rid of it, you bet your bottom dollar I'll be sanitizing every single bottle and nipple we get from now on. No flames, just advice. :]

    I had thrush for 5 weeks. I tried just about everything too and finally got rid of it by drinking grapefruit seed extract oil in my water and eliminating all sugar in my diet. GL thrush is terrible!!!!

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  • image Brendamndz:

    Oh yay, I was going to start this!

     R has been grumpy all day, it is still really warm and she only napped for maybe 45 min so far in the grocery store, that was over 3 hours ago. I finally got her to nap in the moby but because it is so warm I wanted to take her out and put her in her room, the coolest room. I got her in there then grabbed a shower. Our bathroom is literally 4 steps from her room. Is that bad? 

    I really need to clean my house, it is a disaster but I am sitting her, bumping, eating a salad and drinking an iced coffee. Oh and rocking out to Britney Spears. That part is embarrassing.  

    I am on my 5th load of laundry though.

     

    I had spaghetti for breakfast yesterday.

    Sometimes I fake sleeping when DH is off so he will get up with R first and change her, then bring her to me to eat.

    ETA: R is in the crib with the monitor on.  

     

    Is what bad? Showering while she naps? How else are you supposed to shower? I do it all the time. If he wakes up crying during my 5-10 minutes in the bathroom, then he can cry for a few minutes. It's not the end of the world.

    Maybe that is a confession?? I don't let me kid CIO, but there are definite times when I let him cry for a little while. If my hands are full with my one-year-old, sometimes Cole has to wait a minute. He hates the stroller. He hates the carseat. He only likes his bouncer/playmat/swing for very short periods of time. There are times when he is going to cry and I can't get to him right away. He is a fussy baby, and it is not practical for me to have him in my arms 24/7. Of course, I try to pick him up as soon as I can, but a few minutes is no big deal in my opinion.  

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  • image BLPL101:

    image Hollylb3:
    image MasonMama:
    I have never sterilized anything for DS2. I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.He still sleeps in his swing usually turned off most nights.He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a nonnapper.He spits up so often that I don't even think twice about what I wipe him up with. My hand, my shirt, his blanket. nbsp;We end up with a lot of laundry.nbsp;nbsp;
    I've occasionally not washed clothes too, but after having dealt with thrush the past 6 weeks, going through nystatin and diflucan and still can't get rid of it, you bet your bottom dollar I'll be sanitizing every single bottle and nipple we get from now on. No flames, just advice. :]

    I had thrush for 5 weeks. I tried just about everything too and finally got rid of it by drinking grapefruit seed extract oil in my water and eliminating all sugar in my diet. GL thrush is terrible!!!!

    If I had an issue, I would definitely sterilize things. I am not anti-sterilizing. Good luck with the thrush. That sounds awful. 

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  • image Mason&Mama:

    I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.

    He still sleeps in his swing (usually turned off) most nights.


    I also just rip off tags as DD wears things.

    DD sleeps in her bouncer every night.  We tried crib from day 1 but she has only ever been content sleeping in my arms or her bouncer.   

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  • image Mason&Mama:

    I have never sterilized anything for DS2.

    He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a non-napper.

    I swore up and down R would not see a moment of TV after seeing my friend let their LO watch storage wars. While R does not watch entire shows, or gets planted in from it on purpose (except for yesterday...) R has seen baby Einstein and sesame street oh and dora but she didn't like it. 

    Yesterday, this is a GOOD one. DH came home from work wanting to DTD, R was nowhere near a nap so he put her in her exersaucer and put play with me sesame on. Yeah. I feel bad. That happened. It wasn't that long though ;)

     

    I can relate to the sterilization thing as well.  Half my stuff hasn't been. I was given a lot of stuff at the hospital, it was never sterilized. They didn't tell me that it had to be. 

  • image BLPL101:

    image Hollylb3:
    image MasonMama:
    I have never sterilized anything for DS2. I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.He still sleeps in his swing usually turned off most nights.He watches TV with my toddler. Mommy needs to get things done around the house, and he is a nonnapper.He spits up so often that I don't even think twice about what I wipe him up with. My hand, my shirt, his blanket. nbsp;We end up with a lot of laundry.nbsp;nbsp;


    I've occasionally not washed clothes too, but after having dealt with thrush the past 6 weeks, going through nystatin and diflucan and still can't get rid of it, you bet your bottom dollar I'll be sanitizing every single bottle and nipple we get from now on. No flames, just advice. :]

    I had thrush for 5 weeks. I tried just about everything too and finally got rid of it by drinking grapefruit seed extract oil in my water and eliminating all sugar in my diet. GL thrush is terrible!!!!



    Oh, I don't have it, just him. He's FF. I got some genetian violet the other night to start him on, so hopefully that does the trick!
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    **Nestie Besties with Deutschefairy**

    Diagnosed PCOS '03, TTC #1 Since March '09
    BFP - 10/20/10, M/C - 10/29/10
    June 2011 - 50mg Clomid = No O
    Dieted and exercised my butt off for PCOS = BFP 5/7/2012
    Due 12/29/2012
  • image Mason&Mama:
    image Brendamndz:

    Oh yay, I was going to start this!

     R has been grumpy all day, it is still really warm and she only napped for maybe 45 min so far in the grocery store, that was over 3 hours ago. I finally got her to nap in the moby but because it is so warm I wanted to take her out and put her in her room, the coolest room. I got her in there then grabbed a shower. Our bathroom is literally 4 steps from her room. Is that bad? 

    I really need to clean my house, it is a disaster but I am sitting her, bumping, eating a salad and drinking an iced coffee. Oh and rocking out to Britney Spears. That part is embarrassing.  

    I am on my 5th load of laundry though.

     

    I had spaghetti for breakfast yesterday.

    Sometimes I fake sleeping when DH is off so he will get up with R first and change her, then bring her to me to eat.

    ETA: R is in the crib with the monitor on.  

     

    Is what bad? Showering while she naps? How else are you supposed to shower? I do it all the time. If he wakes up crying during my 5-10 minutes in the bathroom, then he can cry for a few minutes. It's not the end of the world.

    Maybe that is a confession?? I don't let me kid CIO, but there are definite times when I let him cry for a little while. If my hands are full with my one-year-old, sometimes Cole has to wait a minute. He hates the stroller. He hates the carseat. He only likes his bouncer/playmat/swing for very short periods of time. There are times when he is going to cry and I can't get to him right away. He is a fussy baby, and it is not practical for me to have him in my arms 24/7. Of course, I try to pick him up as soon as I can, but a few minutes is no big deal in my opinion.  



    Haha. It's just I usually bring her in with me in the bouncer or wait until DH comes home. But we went to the store for him today and it was HOT so I needed a shower. It was my first time showering while she was in the crib.

    Thanks for letting me know it is ok though!
  • image MasonMama:
    I also never wash new clothes before he wears them ... rip off the tags and ready to go.He still sleeps in his swing usually turned off most nights.


    These both could be mine. My MIL was kinda giving me a hard time about the swing thing today...and I basically said "look, until I am done with work in 4 weeks I'll take my sleep anyway I can get it". Ours is only turned off because the motor broke!


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  • I don't follow the "throw away breast milk after four hours out" rule.

    I shower with him in his bouncer every morning and now he expects it... not sure how this will work when he's mobile. 

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  • BLPL101BLPL101
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    image zonagirlie:

    I don't follow the "throw away breast milk after four hours out" rule.

    I shower with him in his bouncer every morning and now he expects it... not sure how this will work when he's mobile. 

    My LC said 8 hours is fine. I pump before bed and leave it out overnight. I've been doing it since she was born and she's never gotten sick from it.

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  • image BLPL101:
    image zonagirlie:

    I don't follow the "throw away breast milk after four hours out" rule.

    I shower with him in his bouncer every morning and now he expects it... not sure how this will work when he's mobile. 

    My LC said 8 hours is fine. I pump before bed and leave it out overnight. I've been doing it since she was born and she's never gotten sick from it.

    Huh.  I've never had enough breastmilk that it sits around, but I've read that it can sit out a lot longer than 4 hours, even 8.  I'm trying to remember what it was that I read, but it was like a lot longer than I would have thought.  I was surprised.  But it also makes sense with the properties that BM contains.   So yeah, no worries :)

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  • sewvt86sewvt86
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    I wear my baby facing out, granted not in a "crotch dangler", and I am 100% confident in it. She has refused to face in from day one, LOVES observing the world, and has always been extremely observant. I have never seen her to display any signs of overstimulation. She is comfortable, happy, and close to me. Facing out is the only way baby wearing works for us at this time and I think it is crazy to be judged for it especially considering kids in strollers are looking out all the time without any grief given to their parents. 





  • My baby is currently wide awake and wanting to play and I don't mind since I miss her when she's at daycare. 

    She really should be sleeping, but instead we're dancing and making funny faces at each other.  I'll probably regret it in the morning when she's grumpy.

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  • image sbevmc09:
    image BLPL101:
    image zonagirlie:

    I don't follow the "throw away breast milk after four hours out" rule.

    I shower with him in his bouncer every morning and now he expects it... not sure how this will work when he's mobile. 

    My LC said 8 hours is fine. I pump before bed and leave it out overnight. I've been doing it since she was born and she's never gotten sick from it.

    Huh.  I've never had enough breastmilk that it sits around, but I've read that it can sit out a lot longer than 4 hours, even 8.  I'm trying to remember what it was that I read, but it was like a lot longer than I would have thought.  I was surprised.  But it also makes sense with the properties that BM contains.   So yeah, no worries :)



    When I read 4 I was like wait what?
    I always thought that it was at least 6 if not 8.
  • image katiebird1127:
    In my opinion, there'd be no sex AND no sleep!  Definite relationship-damaging if you ask me.

    Hah! Now that's presumptuous of you because we bed share with DS and did with DD until she was two, we all get lots of sleep and DH and I have lots of sex. Really. It works for us and we all love it.

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  • I have no idea how many weeks DD is.  I still see people talking about weeks and I lost track somewhere around 10-12.  I think I may have been saying she was 11 weeks for 2 weeks in a row and then I gave up.  Can't we just all agree to go by months now?  Stick out tongue
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  • image sbevmc09:
    I have no idea how many weeks DD is.  I still see people talking about weeks and I lost track somewhere around 10-12.  I think I may have been saying she was 11 weeks for 2 weeks in a row and then I gave up.  Can't we just all agree to go by months now?  Stick out tongue

    I missed a week somewhere. I wrote 15 weeks earlier, but he is really 16 weeks. In real life, I always say 3 1/2 months or "almost 4 months". I am just more specific here because everyone else is.

     

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  • I just have to say, so many of these "confessions" make me feel so much better. Especially your list, Mason&Mama. Nodded my head and laughed through almost all of them!
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  • Also... (I've never been able to successfully edit a previous post, hence a new one)

    I always swore we wouldn't bedshare and we did with DD and we do with DS. And it's never once gotten in the way of sex. Better sleep for everyone! :) 

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  • SWOG31SWOG31
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    image sbevmc09:
    I have no idea how many weeks DD is.  I still see people talking about weeks and I lost track somewhere around 10-12.  I think I may have been saying she was 11 weeks for 2 weeks in a row and then I gave up.  Can't we just all agree to go by months now?  Stick out tongue

    Whew, I thought I was the only one. I think I lost count around 12 weeks too. Going by months is so much easier.

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  • image SWOG31:

    image sbevmc09:
    I have no idea how many weeks DD is.  I still see people talking about weeks and I lost track somewhere around 10-12.  I think I may have been saying she was 11 weeks for 2 weeks in a row and then I gave up.  Can't we just all agree to go by months now?  Stick out tongue

    Whew, I thought I was the only one. I think I lost count around 12 weeks too. Going by months is so much easier.



    The only reason I "remember" correctly is because I get the weekly, "Your baby is _____ so many weeks old" emails from TB and Baby Center. Otherwise, I'd never remember anymore. I was trying to remember yesterday after reading that last post and then I got my weekly email today!
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