April 2013 Moms

GTKY: Expected / Unexpected?

What are the things about pregnancy/mommyhood that turned out the way you had expected? Anything that turned out completely different?
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Re: GTKY: Expected / Unexpected?

  • Honestly, mine are pretty much all unexpected :D 

    - The crazy PP hormones. I swear they weren't half as bad with my girls.
    - My child enjoying tummy time as much as he does
    - The swelling. Something else I didn't experience before
    - Finding my baby so beautiful. I knew I'd love him unconditionally, but I cannot stop looking at him <3

    Expected
    - All the unsolicited advice. lol 

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  • I expected sleepless nights and bouts of unpredictable crying, etc.

    I did not expect to crack so easily under the pressure. I cry daily. I know a lot of that is hormones, but I didn't expect to feel so weak in those moments!

  • Unexpected:  How hard it'd be to balance loving on both my kids.  DS is only 2.5 so he's still a baby in his own right, I just didn't realize it'd be this hard to really feel like I'm giving them both 100%.

    Expected:  Definitely the comments and advice from anybody and everybody.  Also the support from my friends and husband, so lucky to have them I knew they'd be willing to listen to me whine nonstop and so far they all are :)

    Expected AND Unexpected:  the HORMONES!!!  I had been warned before my son and knew they were coming but they still knocked me on my feet.. and this time around I even warned my husband (he was deployed last time around so he never got to experience PP hormones up close and personal lol) but GOSH they are INTENSE!!  I knew they were coming but good Lord they are still kicking my .  

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  • Unexpected:
    how much I love this little girl... As someone who used to say I never wanted kids, like PP I also can't stop looking at her
    Seeing how much my DH is obsessed with her as well, he also loves her to pieces
    How well I can function on so little sleep :
    How sore and swollen I still am

    Expected:
    Not much, FTM here so it's all new to me!

  • I'm a FTM and I didn't have a lot of expectations, but here are some:

    unexpected:

    how much easier pregnancy was on my body than I thought it would be. I have had back problems  for years, but my back wasn't affected much.

    How awesome MH is with Kieran, he definitely exceeded my expectations.

    expected: how much I love being a mom! And that I was able to handle a med free birth. 

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  • none5none5
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    FTM so I tried not to have too many expectations, but I think things are going really well. I worried about BFing, but we seem to have that down now. The weird sleep schedule isn't too terrible, and I think I am sharing responsibility with DH better than he even expected. I really like being a mom so far-- projectile poop and all! 
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  • I expected the sleepless nights, cluster feeding in the evenings, and the awesome night sweats!! I also expected to be more hormonal as in crying over everything, but I've really only had one little meltdown and it was because DS didn't want to nap.

    I didn't expect DS to be soooo good with LO. I expected a lot more jealousy and there is none!! Not that he's not challenging and we have moments, but overall he's been fantastic!
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  • Expected: Sleepless nights & fatigue - the rest has really not been what I expected this time around.

    Unexpected: This amazingly easy baby I have who breastfeeds great (so much better than DS1) then stays awake with no fussing for a while and naps then it starts over again!

    How amazing DS1 is doing with everything. He loves his little brother so much & hasn't gotten jealous... yet.

    How DH is handling everything. Honestly, he was much better the first time around so far as being helpful. Now he just comes home from work and lays on the couch. He never wakes up in the night (because "I'm breastfeeding so what's the point"). He has also made comments to me that are somewhat hurtful. I said something about him coming home and spending two hours on the couch (his job is sitting working on computers all day so not laborious) and his reply was "What's the problem, you sit on the couch all day." No DH, I don't. I care for a newborn and a 2 year old at the same time. They have both been bathed, fed, and changed several times today, and there are no dishes on the sink and the apartment is clean. How I did all that from the couch is pretty impressive if you ask me!

    Okay, so this turned more into a vent than anything lol I just hope once DS2 becomes more interactive DH will show more of an interest in him.



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  • I expected it to be more difficult in terms of sleep deprivation, nonstop crying baby, etc, but we lucked out and,knock on wood, have a fairly easy baby! DH and I aren't miserably exhausted, and we have a system worked out for through the night, which really helps both of us.
    Unexpected were the hormones. Like PPs said, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't think it would be as intense as it ended up being! Also, I'm still sore 3 weeks after my csection. I thought I'd be in the clear by now, but I get pretty sore by the evening. Looking forward to being back to normal!
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  • JSS1002JSS1002
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    Pregnancy:
    I did not expect to be as completely and totally exhausted throughout the ENTIRE pregnancy.

    I didn't expect the pelvic pain, especially in the third trimester

    I didn't expect to NOT have morning sickness (I'm one of the lucky ones)

    I didn't expect to have an easy time managing my weight (I always have been overweight and struggled with my weight -- and I managed to only gain about 25-30 lbs)

    Mommyhood /PP:
    I did not expect to lose all the babyweight + 10 lbs almost immediately and without trying (see above).  Figured I'd basically be fat forever.

    I did not expect breastfeeding to be as time consuming or frequent as it is!

    I didn't expect the nightly scream-a-thon that occurs from about 7-10 PM every evening.

    I'm not going to bother listing out the "expected" Because it is all pretty textbook!

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  • Kate_CKate_C
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    Expected: lack of sleep, although it has been rough. I also am just a lot more confident and relaxed about taking care of the baby. I feel like I have a clue this time. :

    Unexpected: quick and fairly easy labor. How awesome DS has been with the baby. Like a PP, how hard it is to feel like I'm giving both kids 100. How tough recovery has been on my body between the episiotomy and tear, my perineum hurts like a mo fo. And it seems like I've had less support from DH this time. He has been primary caregiver for our toddler and not spent much time with the baby. I feel like he resents me for not helping more with DS, but keeping up with nursing is about all I can handle right now. This recovery has been rough on me.
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  • Expected: the instant and strong bond, the lack of sleep, the amazing feeling I get from newborn cuddles, some stress.

    unexpected: the struggles we have had with nursing. I nursed my first two with really no issues. Sam could not latch and so I am ep'ing.  I always said I didn't know how Epers could do it as it seemed like so much work and I always said it was not something I could do.  But now at 6 weeks out I understand that I just have to take it day by day.   

    Mommy to L (6), J (4) and S (March 2013)

  • I expected these early weeks to be hard, but I never expected to be able to function decently on so little sleep!

    I expected a natural birth, I never expected I'd have to deal with preeclampsia and being transferred to an ob. Once that happened, I didn't expect a natural birth anymore, but I still got it!

    I expected my mom and dh to be helpful, I never expected to need both off their help so much.

  • With DS who is now 5 I felt very overwhelmed and like my life was over because everything changed so quickly.  With DD I expected the worst and have been really surprised with how much better it has gone.  I didn't think I enjoyed newborns because of how I felt with DS, but I really love snuggling her and bf'ing.  I struggled bf'ing DS and it was something I dreaded because of how difficult he was to feed.  I loved being pregnant both times and had great pregnancies.  I definitely thinking having the age difference we have has also made this a better experience because DS has school all week so I can focus just on DD during that time.  If he was home all day with me I think I would not feel as relaxed and well adjusted as I do at just a week in.
  • Expected: That I would have a baby. That he would sleep in our room. That I would feel anxious.  That I would be goofily in love with this little one.

    Unexpected: the hormones. The fact that I'd sometimes be scared of my child. The level of anxiety that I feel. The fact that my husband is handling sleep deprivation better than I am. Failure at breast-feeding. Pumping full-time. Having an Emergency C-section. The fact I probably shouldn't have anymore kids.


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  • Unexpected:

    My first daughter having a hard time adjusting. I didn't think it would be an issue.

    Breastfeeding being so difficult this time! Most of the time Molly ends up with breastmilk dripping all over her face while she tries to avoid latching. Not fun.

    My recovery being much faster this time around.

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  • Basically the whole experience ended up being unexpected. When we decided to get pregnant, I was just listening to my biological clock and didn't logically think it through how it could be. I knew that I would have a lot of support and felt that I could manage whatever happened. The pregnancy was a lot harder on me than I expected especially after 32 weeks. I also knew that life would drastically change and that raising a child would be challenging, but .... I realize now that I didn't really know how much of a challenge it would be to handle the c-section recovery, the hormones, the lack of sleep, LO's crying fits... I was depressed for the first three weeks PP. Things are definitely getting better though!
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  • I expected the sleep deprivation to be a lot harder on me. It is hard but as long as I'm getting two hour naps every few hours, I'm good. 

    I didn't expect the helpless, guilty feeling of not being able to figure out what he wants or why he's upset sometimes. It makes me feel so bad.  

    I thought bath time would be fun. Not so much.

     

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