We just lost our baby girl, Ava Claire, a week ago today at 30 weeks. I don't know what to do with myself. I miss her so much. I still keep thinking she's in my belly and I keep expecting her to kick. I know loss is always unexpected, but I just can't accept that she's gone because she was SO close to full term. It kills me knowing she could have survived in the world. As far as anyone has been able to determine, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. I keep reliving the days prior and wishing to God that I could go back and see a doctor and deliver her before anything happened.
I don't know how to get through this. I am going back to work in 2 weeks and part of me is glad to get back to normal, and the other part of me just wants to sleep forever. I just can't believe she's gone.
BFP#2 10/18/13 Blighted ovum 11/25/13
BFP #3 1/31/14 EDD 10/18/14