Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Feel like a horrible mother

So DS had his 15 month well baby checkup today. Everything is fine except....he hasn't gained any weight since the last time I brought him in. In fact, one of the times I took him in recently when he was sick he weighed 19 lbs 15 oz and today he only weighed 19 lbs 11 oz. So he has now dropped from the 3-5 percentile to 1.53%. His height and head circumference are good. He is 30.75 inches (30.97%) and head is 18.25 inches (23.17%). But the weight is pathetic. Now we have to try to supplement with Pediasure which is expensive. I am not optimistic about that working because the whole problem is he hardly drinks anything during the day (e.g. milk, which is where a lot of calories would come from). We are off bottles completely and sometimes he will drink a good amount of milk at dinner time out of his sippy but I would bet he's only getting at most 6 oz on a good day and he should be getting closer to 18-20 I bet. He's always been small and has never been above 5% weight wise but this has me concerned. I really expected that he would be closer to 21 pounds.
 
I'm really frustrated and feel like a bad mother. I just don't know what to do. He eats pretty well, but I guess we need to try more high calorie/high fat/high protein foods. I'm just not sure what else to give him besides what I already do. He is picky sometimes, especially at home. My neighbor's son is 6 weeks younger than DS and weighs 23 lbs. The doctor said DS may just be a small kid, but they do get concerned if their weight drops below the 3-5 percentile and that is where we are at. I just feel like crying. He's healthy, he's happy, he's developmentally on track, but I worry that he's starving and not getting the fat he needs for proper brain development. I can't force him to eat or drink so I'm sort of at a loss.
 
I bought some shorts for him this weekend in 12 month size and put some on him Sunday and they fell down because his waist is so small. Ridiculous. I'm racking my brain trying to figure out what I can do. Ladies, if you have any ideas as to how I can help my son gain weight, I would appreciate any suggestions.
 
TIA.
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Re: Feel like a horrible mother

  • First, cut yourself some slack.  You are not a bad mother.

    Re: milk... the pedi told me he was fine if he got only 12 ounces a day, and some days less.  He said he will regulate it himself and to offer whole milk yogurt and cheese to su

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  • What foods is he eating? I know some high fat, high calorie options are eggs, peanut butter, anything with butter on it, avocado, full fat plain yogurt.
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  • Thanks, Hilarity. We do try to feed him yogurt and/or cheese every day. He drinks out of straw sippies and regular sippies. I wasn't sure if little ones should have chocolate or not but I guess it won't hurt. I assume the amount of caffeine in chocolate p
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  • DS will pound scrambled eggs which I load up with cheese.  That's another good idea.

    We've never had luck with avocados.

    Also, I don't know about your LO, but DS is hell on wheels these days.  He's basically on the move at all tim

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  • image PsyDr04:
    Thanks, Hilarity. We do try to feed him yogurt and/or cheese every day. He drinks out of straw sippies and regular si
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  • You are not a bad mother!  I wouldn't be concerned about a couple oz weight loss, there could be multiple reasons for that.  To cut down on the cost of the pediasure, maybe you could try mixing it with the milk.  Milk itself has lots of

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  • You are definitely not a bad mother. Try to stay positive as hard as it can be. You can try lots of carbs too, DS loves pancakes and peanut butter with toast for breakfast and what about ravioli or something for dinner? DS seriously can eat a ton of pasta
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  • We often find that we can get him to eat much more if we take him out of the high chair. I always start meals in the high chair and then try to offer more while he is playing. People might flame me for that, but I'm of the same mindset as you are - wha

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  • Also, don't feel bad about going back to a bedtime bottle if you want. 
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  • image PsyDr04:

    We often find that we can get him to eat much more if we take him out of the high chair. I always start meals in t

     

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  • I have a similar little guy.  Our pedi told us that when they are fighting that hard for weight gain AND not taking in much milk, chocolate milk is better than no milk.  We also do full fat yogurts and cottage cheese, which he loves.  
    Formerly known as elmoali :)

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  • Prolly not the best thing to do but we give our boys flavored milk and they drink it right down. Strawberry is there favorite,....

  • I just wanted to tell you that my son is a little portly (22 pounds but he's short), and his 15 month appt he had actually lost 1 pound. I think at that age they get more active and that helps them not put on weight so much. So anyway I don't htin



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  • my kiddo is on the same track. she's still below 22lbs at 19mo, but i stopped worrying about it. she does drink a pediasure a day (we call them milkshakes, and she loves them). 

     

    is your son in daycare? or around any other kids?

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  • Sometimes I wonder where all the "percentile" info these doctors speak of comes from.....it always seems to be different.

    My DD was only 20lbs at her 18 month appt.  I was told this was the 10%.  No one was the least bit concerned.&nb

  • DD is 19 months old and still just under 20lbs. My pedi always says as long as she gains and follows her own weight curve there is no need to worry. She's lost at a couple appointments (always after an illness/ear infection) and when that happens we go

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  • I may be the lone wolf here but why not go back to a bottle?  Just one a day?  At bedtime?  We still do one a day and it helps DS slow down, take some quiet time, etc.  Plus, I get to hold him and he NEVER lets me hold him anymore.<

    ~Married 11/08~
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  • When my lo lost weight due to an illness my pedi suggested using carnation instant breakfast. It's a powder you add to whole milk. She said it is the same thing as pediasure. If I had to give pediasure on a regular base I would look into the nutrition and


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  • Do not feel bad.  Is he eating well with solids?  There are ways to get fat into him that aren't just from milk.  PP gave great suggestions, but another would be to cook things in coconut oil to add a little extra fat.

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  • I also have a skinny Minnie, and I started adding 1/2 and 1/2 to her milk cups to get some extra calories into her. It worked...it bumped her from the 3rd percentile to the 27th!  

    BFP: 7/5/10   EDD: 3/13/11  Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks

    BFP: 10/30/10   EDD: 7/7/11   Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.

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  • You are not a bad mother, but I know exactly how you feel. My son is small and from 6-12 months went from the 70%s in weight down to below 10%.  My son, at almost 21 months just now broke 23 lbs and just still wears a lot of 12-18 month clothes.&n

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  • Ditto the Carnation Instant Breakfast.  I have used it with my DD since she turned one.  She is below the 1st percentile (17lbs at 20 mos) and has always had trouble gaining weight.  As long as she seems healthy, try not to worry. 

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  • My DS's weight was low for awhile and they suggested all kinds of high calorie foods--it didn't matter much whether they were "healthy!" I didn't feel comfortable going too far with that as I was afraid that he would get used to eating all junk foods, and
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  • We are in the same boat. DS2 had his 12mo appt today, and he only gained 11oz in the last three months, weighing in at 17lbs 12oz. He went from 12% to 6%. I feel even worse because I bf and he was not getting enough calories from me. Part of it too is



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  • First, you are not a bad mother! It's hard not to worry about growth and weight gain, especially when you have a peanut, but it's one of those things that is for the most part out of our control so do not feel like this is in any way your fault.

    <p
    Mama to two sweet girls
    DD1 Feb 2010
    DD2 Sept 2011


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  • I really appreciate everyone's words of advice and encouragement. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one in this boat! The biggest problem as I see it is that DS simply does not drink much of anything, no matter what it is - water, milk, juice. I tried

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  • image PsyDr04:

    We often find that we can get him to eat much more if we take him out of the high chair. I always start meals in the

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