Infertility Veterans

My update ***m/c mentioned**

I know I've been a PW lately, I'm sorry for post after post. It's just been such an excruciating difficult time and you ladies mean more to me than you'll ever know. How a group of women whom I have never met could mean SO much to me is incredible. :)

I had my D&C yesterday and it went well. OB said that the gestational sac and baby had already detached and I was on the road to miscarry in the next couple of days. This gave me comfort to know we made the right decision for D&C. The procedure went well and while I'm bleeding a little today, I feel back to my normal self. In fact, I'm enjoying a cup of coffee. I'm trying to find the bright side (as though there could be one) to not being pregnant anymore. I think I'll go have myself some sushi and wine in the next few days too!

As for next steps, I talked to the embryologist and she confirmed our fears that she doesn't think our final embryo will survive thaw since it's been frozen twice using slow-freeze methods. So that being said, I feel strongly that our next step will be to find more embryos. This is scary because it's really hard to do, but I feel confident I will some way some how. I may put my feelers out on my blog asking if any of my readers have any that they don't know what to do with, and maybe (if I get enough guts) I might kindly ask on SAIF too. We want more than one child in the long run anyway so it feels like the right thing to do to find more now.

We aren't going to do any "products of conception" miscarriage testing (ugh i hate that term). I did a lot of thinking about what you ladies said and I feel comfortable just letting it be. Although my RE wants me to do some autoimmune testing since there are some questionable aspects of my health that might point to autoimmune. I don't know anything about any of it.

And lastly, we planted a beautiful "Little Gem Magnolia" tree in our yard with a perfect little sleeping angel baby statue below it. I always felt like the baby was a girl so I've named her Magnolia (or baby Maggie) and that's brought me enormous amount of comfort thinking of her as a real person that did exist and will always exist in my heart. I put a picture of the tree and statue on my blog. 

So that's it for me for now. I'll catch up on all the posts from yesterday but I hope everyone is doing okay. Thank you for thinking of me and the kind words, as always. :)

************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
DH: Severe MFI

12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)

My ovaries are just for decoration

12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
 
9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

Snowflake baby is a girl!

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

    
My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
 
    image      image 

Re: My update ***m/c mentioned**

  • Your blog post today has me tearing up. I pray that you find embryos soon and don't have to wait too long to hear a little one calling you Mommy! ((hugs))

    ***signature & ticker warning***


    Me: 30 ~ Stage IV Endo ~ AMH .38 ~ AFC 8
    AMH .97 as of 4/2012! ~ AMH 1.63 as of 4/2013!?!

    Him: 28 ~ perfect swimmers
    Laparotomy w/partial oophorectomy 8/2009 to remove cysts/endo.
    Stopped BCP 4/2010.
    Multiple clomid rounds from 11/2010 to 6/2011. ~ All BFN
    IUI w/clomid 7/2011. IUI w/clomid & injectables 11/2011 & 1/2012. ~ All BFN
    IVF:EPP 5/2012 ~ (4R, 3M, 2F w/ICSI). Both embryos txfrd. ~ BFN
    BCP to manage endo from 10/2012 to 12/2012.
    FET w/donor embryos #1: 10/2013 Cancelled
    FET w/donor embryos #1.2: 11/2013 ~ ET of 2 beautiful blasts on 11/27.
    Beta 1: 503(12dp5dt) Beta 2: 1035(14dpt) Beta 3: 3001(16dpt)
    Beta 4: 8503(19dpt)
    Twins with an EDD of 8/15/14! Team Purple

    If you're wondering about my avatar...it's a fried pickle chip shaped like a fetus!


    image
  • Did you see my post below in dp's thread? i was active on another board but have not been active there for awhile. I saw a post recently of a woman looking to donate her embryos. They are not hers genetically they were donor to her as well. Might be w
    I am AMA and all tests on H came back normal
    3 failed IVF with OE and 2 failed frozen DE cycles
    Last fresh hail mary DE cycle starting Feb 2013
    PAIF/SAIF always welcome
  • image reb259:
    Did you see my post below in dp's thread? i was active on another board but have not been active there for awhile. I

    ************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
    Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
    Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
    DH: Severe MFI

    12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
    8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)

    My ovaries are just for decoration

    12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
    2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
    2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
    3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

    6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
     
    9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
    9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
    9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

    11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
    11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
    Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
    6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

    Snowflake baby is a girl!

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

        
    My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
     
        image      image 
  • thinking of you and yh.

    we are here for you as you process what has happened and as you are able to move forward! 

    TTC #1 since 12/2010 DH: MFI, cancer survivor Me: Resected septate uterus, lap treated mild endo, tubes open, ovulate on own, autoimmune disease 3 Failed IUI's (2/2012, 4/2012, 6/2012) 
    IVF #1 August 2012. BFP! Beta #1 56.7 Beta #2 150 One baby, one heartbeat on 9/20/12! no h/b @7w6d. dandc @8w0d
    FET #1 December 2012, BFN
    FET #2 February 2013, no embies survived thaw
    IVF #2, BFP #2, Loss #2 March 2013, Scar tissue discovered, RPL testing,
    IVF #3, BFP #3, Loss #3 (twins) September 2013
    Hostile ute, moving onto Gestational Carrier!

    GC/FET #1 of 1 5AA blast and 1 compacted blast, February 2014, BFP #4 on 3/1/2014!
    6w u/s 1 bean with h/b of 145 bpm, 8w u/s 187 bpm
    EDD 11/7/14. Please, please, please stick little one!

    Praying unceasingly for a miracle. ALL welcome!

    image










  • Thinking of you both! Your post made me tear up but the tree is such a beautiful idea.
    "Everything will be alright in the end. So if it's not alright, it is not yet the end."
    Me:29 DH:29  TTC since 1/11 Dx: unexplained IF/early DOR/immune issues 
    Feb'12- July'12-testing(all clear minus slight arcuate ute), 3 IUI with clomid all BFN
    8/30IVF#1 Antagonist protocol- ER 9/11-8R, 7M, 5F. 
    ET 9/14 2 embies transferred. 1 10cell Grade 4, 1 8cell Grade 4. No frosties. BFN
    IVF#2 Antagonist protocol plus baby aspirin- ER 12/5-16R, 12M, 8F!
    ET 12/10 5dt! 1 fully expanded blast & 1 early blast. No frosties. BFN
    3/13 hysteroscopy & polypectomy, Consulted w Dr. Kwak-Kim.  
    DX: High NK cells, cytokines, DHEAs& PAI1;  hypothyroid, +APA, restricted bloodflow
    7/13 IVF#3 Long lupron protocol with PIO, Crinone, Prometrium, and vivelle
    (plus synthroid, metformin, baby asa, metanx, PNV, Vit E, D, calcium, fish oil, CoQ10, IVIg infusions and lovenox per Dr. Kwak-kim)
    ER 7/19 14R, 11M, 9F(4 natural fert, 5 with ICSI)
    ET 5dt 7/24 2 fully expanded blasts.  SURPRISE 3 FROSTIES!!!
    Beta #1 8/2 335!!!! Beta #2 829!!!  1st u/s 8/14 showed TWINS!!!!!
    11/11: TEAM PURPLE!!!!!
    3/21/14-L&W born at 37w via csection

    Here Comes the Sun Blog
    PAIF/SAIF welcome!
  • It seems like you're doing your best to grieve and confront your loss, and I agree that planting a tree is a wonderful thing to do.

    Sending you hugs and all my best wishes.


  • Big hugs to you, Liz. I hope you find your forever embies soon.



    ******SIGGY/TICKER WARNING******

    Me: 40. DH: 42. TTC since 2009. 
    Normal-ish hormone levels (<9.5 FSH, 0.9 AMH).  Weird egg maturity issue.
    July 2011 - Feb. 2012: 2 Clomid/TI cycles; 3 injectables/IUI cycles. Good response but BFNs.
    Dec. 2011: Laparoscopy (clear) + hysteroscopy to remove uterine polyp.
    Apr. 2012: IVF #1: Antagonist protocol. 7R, 0M, 0F. :-(
    Nov. 2012: IVF #2: Long Lupron protocol. 9R, 1M, 1F. 3dt of my one lil' embie on 11/23: BFN. :-(
    Dec. 2012: Hail Mary IUI cycle with leftover IVF meds: BFN.
    Feb. 2013: IVF #3: Estrogen priming protocol, max stims. 6R, 1M, 1F w/rescue ICSI. My one embie didn't make it. :-(
    July 2013:  DE IVF #1. Canceled just before retrieval when donor tested positive for (active) CMV.  :-(
    Oct. 2013:  DE IVF #2, with wonderful new donor. ER 10/25:  31R, 24F. 5dt of one beautiful 4AB blast: 10/30. 14 frosties(!). BFP at 5dp5dt. Beta 11/8 (9dp5dt): 179. Beta 11/15 (16dp5dt): 2274. First US 11/25 (6w3d): a perfect little bean with a HB of 118. Second US 12/9 (8w3d): HB 170. Anatomy scan 2/27:  It's a perfect little GIRL! 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
          image   image
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • I am new here but I have been following your posts throughout this because I was cycling around the same time (I got delayed).  I just want to tell you that you and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers.  {{HUGS}}

    <Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Married June 2011 Dx: anovulatory due to prolactinoma (1.5cmx 1.5cm in 2006)
    April 2012: MRI- questionable cyst 8mg by 12mm in pituitary ; referred to RE by Ob-gyn after amenorrhea x 4+ months, provera ineffective, low estrogen level
    cycle 1: May 2012, clomid 50mg; cycle cancelled, thin lining, no response
    cycle 2: June 2012, femara 5mg; cycle cancelled, no response
    cycle 3: July 2012, femara 7.5mg; cycle cancelled (largest folli on Cd12 & cd 16: 11, lining 4)
    Repeat MRI July 25,2012- Cyst unchanged, likely old infarction.
    Aug. 8: met with RE, move to injectables if HSG and SA normal
    Aug. 23: HSG all clear; DH- perfect
    Switched to a new RE in early Sept. IVF here we come
    Genetic testing reveals: Fragile X- Intermediate risk/grey zone.
    IVF#1: ER 11/30: 14 retrieved, 10 mature, 7 fertilized. E2 prior to trigger 5200. Decision made to freeze 6 embryos and transfer later due to OHSS.
    IVF#1.2/FET #1: estrogen injects start 1/18, FET delayed to try to thicken lining. lining 5.4mm. FET- 2/18- transferred one 3AA expanded blast. BFP 5dp5dt. Beta #1- 2/27 9dp5dt- 102.27 beta #2 3/1: 147 :(, beta #3 3/4: 268 told to stop meds and let nature take its course. requested 4th beta (3/6); Beta hell for 2 months.

    FET # 2: endometrial scratch 5/6, added estrace vaginally and ASA to delestrogen and PIO. June 10- transferred one 4AA hatched embryo, BFP 4dp6dt, Beta 1 (9dp6dt) 187, Beta 2 (11dp6dt): 412; Beta 3 (15dp6dt ): 4452. U/S #1- one beautiful embryo with a heartbeat of 133 at 7 weeks.  8 weeks: heartbeat 156. Panorama test reveals- it's a girl and she's healthy! EDD 2/26/2014

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Liz I am glad the dc went well. I wish you the best of luck hunting embryos and will keep my eye out for you. If you have any questions about autoimmune testing pm me.
    6 m/c
    Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
    Natural cycle Dec 2010 BFP M/C 6 1/2 Weeks, D&E Jan 2011
    1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
    Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
    1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
    Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
    DQ ALPHA HLA MATCH, High NK Cells Diagnosed Dec 2011
    IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
    IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
    Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
    Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone) 
    Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
    Nov/Dec 2012 LIT Treatment
    Dec 12 Humira
    Jan 2013 BFP
    Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
    Miracle Born August 2013 Premature

    Yours doesn't have to be a sad story



    image
    image


    Lilypie - (ugiy)


  • I'm glad you posted today with an update. Sounds like the dc went well. I've been thinking of you and hope the emotional and physical healing process goes as well as can be hoped.
    Married 8/2008. IVF with PGD March 2013.
    3/22 ER: 25R, 20M, 15F. 9 genetically normal, and 3 survived to Day 5
    3/27 ET: transferred 1 embryo, beta 9dp5dt=163, 12dp5dt=639
    4/25 1st ultrasound at 7 weeks = identical twins with heartbeats?!!!
    PPROM at 31w, delivery at 32 weeks of two beautiful girls
    image
  • I am so glad you made it though that rough part. I can tell you from experience how much better I felt after my D&C in a way. It felt like I could finally breathe and start to recover. I wish you the best moving forward. 
    image. image
    Me: 35, DH: 36, ttc: 5 years, dx: unknown
    10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
    11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid med & normal hsg),
    12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
    6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
    IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
    IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
    IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
    IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. CFNBC.
  • I'm so sorry for all that you've gone through. Your post brought tears to my eyes.
    image

    Photobucket


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    From the dirt to the moon!



    PAIF and SAIF welcome

  • My heart goes out to you and my prayers for healing are with you!!  Thank you for your posts and updates, I appreciate them and get comfort and insight from them!   Big hug to you ~ hope you enjoyed the wine and coffee!!!
  • I left my email address on your blog in a comment for you to email me. nbsp;I want to help....

    Updated....I emailed you.
  • image LaineyPaney:
    I left my email address on your blog in a comment for you to email me. nbsp;I want to help.... Updated....I em

    ************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
    Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
    Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
    DH: Severe MFI

    12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
    8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)

    My ovaries are just for decoration

    12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
    2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
    2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
    3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

    6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
     
    9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
    9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
    9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

    11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
    11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
    Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
    6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

    Snowflake baby is a girl!

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

        
    My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
     
        image      image 
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