March 2013 Moms

my unique birth story

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I have been following this message board ever since I found out I was pregnant but never actually wrote something. I noticed many have posted their birth story and I figured this might be a good time for me to tell mine. My birth story has definitely been a unique one and hopefully if nothing else I can gain some clarity and closer just by writing this.


On March 4th, the day my sweet baby girl was born was a day like any other I had had for the past few months for the most part. I woke up and noticed I had a little more leakage than normal but nothing crazy and definitely no contractions so I figured this was just something that happens toward the end of your pregnancy. I got up ready to start my day and headed to the hospital to see my mom.


Unfortunately my mom has battled an autoimmune disease called lupus for much of my life. Around Christmas time she had a flare up and ended up in the hospital having to have emergency surgery on her small intestines where the lupus had caused a bowel perforation. She actually recovered pretty quickly so we thought and then a couple weeks later they discovered a second perforation. This time she was rushed to surgery and they had to remove a portion of her intestines. This time the damage was more severe and she was put into ICU and went into a coma.


 My mom is very young only 51 and I was in my 3rd trimester so this was hard for me to handle but I never gave up hope and knew what a fighter she was. A few weeks went by and my mom came out of her coma and seemed to be regaining a lot of strength and making progress. We were all very hopeful that she would be going into a regular room soon.


Then the days seemed to turn into a roller coaster ride. She would be doing good one day and then bad the next. Around the end of February the doctors discovered my moms wound from the surgery had formed an infection that was eating away at her body. She had two different surgeries to try to remove the infection but ultimately nothing was working. The next thing we knew her body started to give up and she ended up having many perforations in her intestines and there was nothing else the doctors could do.


The doctors had told us before that she wasn?t going to make it but she had proven them wrong, however we knew this time was different. She was slowly slipping and we weren?t sure how much time we had left with her. So just like any other day, on March 4th  I went up to the hospital to see my mom. While I was there I decided I would go across the street to my doctor?s office and make sure this leakage was normal. I got there around 1:30pm and when I got up on the table in the office my water immediately broke everywhere! This was a huge surprise to me since I was two weeks early and this was my first baby.


I ran back across the street to labor and delivery at the hospital and was admitted at 2:00pm. At 4:00pm I was 5cm dilated and at 4:30 I was 10cm. I pushed three times and sweet little Brooksley was born at 5:02pm.


I must say that I had the most amazing nurses who really pulled a lot of strings and were able to wheel me up on a stretcher to my mom?s room in ICU 15 min after I gave birth. I knew that I may not have much time with her and I wanted to tell her how perfect her new grand daughter was.  The nurses wheeled my bed next to my moms and I was able to lay next to her, hold her hand and tell her how much I loved her. I told her Brooksley was here and that she was beautiful and perfect.


 As I told my mom about her new granddaughter her blood pressure went up and her eyes opened. I knew that was what my mom was waiting for; She was holding on long enough to hear that her sweet granddaughter was here and healthy.


I went back down stairs to be with my new daughter and a few short hours later my mom passed away. These past few weeks have definitely been hard and challenging and it was tough for me to come to terms with the fact that as I was becoming a mom I was losing mine. I was worried that it would be difficult to know that the day my daughter was born was also the day my mother passed away but I have come to realize my baby girl is very lucky, the day she was born she didn?t just lose her grandmother she gained a guardian angel. I know that it?s been difficult to join this journey of motherhood with out the advice and guidance of my mother but I know she looks over us everyday. She was a fighter and full of love and strength that I will hopefully be able to instill in my daughter. 

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