Babies: 0 - 3 Months

First weeks at home

I was wondering how long everyone's mothers stayed with them after you gave birth. I gave birth last Thursday and my mom left by Sunday... She came back this Thursday and plans to leave again on Sunday. Plus when shes here she seems more interested in her buying/selling her house than her first grandchild. My husband goes back to work on Monday and I've asked mom to stay then instead, however she said she needs to take the wallpaper down in her house instead... I feel really hurt by this. I mean, I just expected her to be more interested in being here with us.. Is anyone else going through this?
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Re: First weeks at home

  • 0 days....this is mine and my husbands baby.  While that would be nice I know it is up to us to take care of him.
  • 0 days like PP. With both kiddos 0 days. I may have been clueless, but it isn't my mothers job to take care of me while I try to figure out mothering. With both kids, I told my mother to wait to come until she was comfortable with coming, and it was at 2
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  • My mom was with me at hospital, but DH and I took DS home on our own on the Friday.  Mom was going to come help on the Tuesday, but when DS was taken back to hospital Saturday night my mom made arrangements to come Sunday.  She stayed thru Thurs
    *** DS born February 21, 2013 - Toronto, Canada  ***
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  • None, it was just DH and I from the get go.
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  • My mom lives only about 5 minutes away so she came by everyday for the first week and cooked a meal and visited baby
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  • DH was home for the first week and after that it was just me. I had no interest in anyone staying in my house after baby arrived! Family would stop by for short visits but no one stayed overnight (that would have driven me crazy). 



  • 0 days with both babies. It's not her job. Can I ask why you expect her to stay!
    With my first DH went back to work after a week and he worked overnights and long crazy hours. And DD had reflux and colic. I did it on my own. You can handle it. You

  • With DD, it was Christmas, so we had various family members at our house/in town for 3 wks. With DS, we had just moved and both my mom and the ILs stayed with DD while I was In the hospital for 2 nights. My ILs live right around the corner, so they are at
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  • My mom came to stay for the first month, but we live overseas and it's a big trip.  She spent her mornings exploring the local area and her evenings telecommuting, so it wasn't too intense for any of us.  If we had lived more locally though, she
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  • My mom was here 3 weeks when the baby was 2 weeks old... But more because she had the vacation time and hasn't seen DD and DS in over 6 months, and DH was traveling for work. We live a four hour plane ride away from all of our family, so it was great havi
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  • Thanks everyone for your input! I guess for me its not that I need her to help with LO, just to know she's interested and cares is what hurt me especially on my first few night duties by myself.. LO has trouble sleeping without touch...
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  • My mom also stayed 0 days. She came often to visit but DH and I were on duty from day 1 and I wouldn't have wanted it to be any different.
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  • My mother come for a few night here and there. She came to visit us in the hospital and then the first weekend we were home. Then she came the following weekend and I went to visit her last weekend.  It was nice to have some company during the day. W

  • Let me preface this by saying that my
    Mother and MIL live in different states then I do.

    With our first, my mother came when baby was 1 week; she stayed for a week. She spent a good majority of the time on the phone for work, and it dr
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  • My mom stayed for 2-3 days. She lives 4 hours away and was here Mon to Fri (I went into labor Sunday night) but we were in the hospital til Wednesday so I really didn't see her much. However, since she was down visiting she was able to watch my nephew so
  • Why do you need her to be physically present to know she cares? It sounds like life is busy and stressful for her right now. You should be more understanding, and not need her to hold your hand.

    FTR, my mom didn't stay with us at all, being a
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  • image ettraud:
    Thanks everyone for your input! I guess for me its not that I need her to help with LO, just to know she's interested
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  • image ettraud:
    Thanks everyone for your input! I guess for me its not that I need her to help with LO, just to know she's interested an
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  • Some people just aren't all ooey-gooey gaga for newborns...grandbaby or not.  Doesn't' mean she doesn't love you guys, but for some people, helping with housework and then otherwise sitting around the house staring at a new momma hold her baby is a l
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  • My mom pased away six years before my DD was born but with my other two pregnancies she came over and cooked meals...helped around the house etc.

    There is nothing wrong with feeling needy right now or hopeful for some caring, nurturing etc from y

    But we are born to be happy, to be abundantly supplied with every good thing, to have fun in living, to consciously unite with the Divine Power that is around us and within us, and to grow and expand forever. ~Ernest Holmes BabyFruit Ticker
  • Sounds like you are expecting a lot from your mom.  My mom visited us in the hospital for 2 hours, and helped take us to DD's newborn appointment because DH had an important meeting at work. My in-laws visited us for 2 hours at the hospital and st


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  • My parents came the night we got home from the hospital and stayed for a week. Super long story short, my
    mom caused a bunch of drama, per usual, and it was a horrible week that should have been about DS but ended up all about her. My in laws came t
  • image spring_time:
    Sounds like you are expecting a lot from your mom. nbsp;My mom visited us in the hospital for 2 hours, and helped take
  • My mom lives 15 min away and came by a few times the first week so I could shower. She would bring lunch. That was it, get over it.
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  • I have decided there is no pleasing new moms. 

    OP, nothing you wrote makes you sound abandoned by your mother. Unless she's done something wretched that you haven't mentioned, you're either suffering from hormones or delusion or both. The fe

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  • My parents live near.  DH stayed home 3 days to help with DS1 and my mom came the 4th day because I wasn't cleared to drive yet and needed to go to the store.  She did the laundry and cleaned the kitchen too!  That was nice.  We hav

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  • DH was home with me our first week. My mother stayed 3 days and 2 nights. My MIL has been stopping by (whenever she feels like) a couple times a week. I find it more tiresome to make sure they feel comfortable than taking care of the baby.



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    MINE

  • image piglet6609:
    0 days with both babies. It's not her job. Can I ask why you expect her to stay!
    With my first DH went back to w
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  • Agree with PP. My mom has come to visit but hasn't stayed over. My husband took two weeks off from work and he is really the only one I need or want here. At some point the visitors will be few and far between as will the help so better for us to do as mu
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