DH and I have had an ongoing battle for 5 years now. He just WILL NOT grow up!
He stay up until 4-5am every night, and then wants to sleep all day. IF he does go to sleep at night, it is on the couch. I leave for work at 6 am. Sometimes he is still up when I get up to go to work in the am. DH doesn't leave for work until 1pm (he works afternoons), so he is home with DS when I leave. I rely on him to wake up when DS gets up (usually by 8, assuming he sleeps). So DH is home, looking after the baby, on zero sleep, and I am sitting here at my desk feeling horrible because I know DS isn't getting the attention or care that he deserves.
I have told DH over and over and over that it needs to stop. He always promises it will, and promises it will change, he will put his responsibilities first, this lasts about 3 days, and then it's back to business as usual.
I am so close to putting DS in daycare full time, from the time I leave (6 am), until I get home (6:30pm). I don't think this is fair, or right AT ALL. Why should DS be in daycare 12 hours a day when his father is home? I am at the end of my rope, and this morning, when I got out of the shower at 5:30 and DH was still up, I snapped. I told him that this is his absolute last chance. Either he grows the eff up immediately, or I need to do what is best for DS and I, which means full time daycare. I then went on to tell him that if that is the route we need to go, I am going to be completely disgusted with him, and am going to need to re-evaluate our family situation, as I don't think I can be with somebody who is so self centered that he puts his own wants ("me time") over his family obligations.
I don't want to need to follow through, but I feel like I'm at the point where I need to. I can't keep making empty threats, adn telling him that he had better start being responsible "or else". It is not my place to do that.
Am I completely over reacting or expecting too much?