March 2013 Moms

anyone not receive any hand me downs?

I'm a bit surprised no one has tried to pawn anything off on me.

Due March 25, 2013

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Re: anyone not receive any hand me downs?

  • I have mostly only gotten clothes but HOLY clothes!! Way too many!!
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  • I didn't receive anything either...which I was a little shocked by b/c my husband and I have 10 neices and nephews (on his side) mostly all 7 years old and younger and most of the parents are done having kids. But honestly I'm glad b/c I'm picky about things and probably wouldn't want the stuff but would feel bad saying no.
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  • I was surprised at how few I received. Once people found out I was having a boy, after 2 girls, I received about a dozen offers. In the end, I was given two small boxes by two different people and that was it (and one of them was a box of new-looking onesies and sleepers)
    DD- 11/17/08, DD- 11/16/09, DS- 3/20/13 
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  • image britt1430:
    Nope, none. Our neighbor who is about 8 weeks behind me in her pregnancy (a girl this time) wanted to give me her 2 year old son's hand me downs and said to stop by anytime. She asked me about a month ago and I periodically say hi to her/her husband and always ask how she is doing when I see them out front. Well, unlike her (she has been off from work since month 5 while her MIL who is staying with them waits on her hand and foot and watches the 2 year old), I have been working my usual 50 hour weeks and commuting and at almost 9 months, so needless to say, I lagged on picking up the hand me downs. Well, when I finally had time to ask, she was like, "Oh, I ended up donating them to Brazil (she's Brazilian) since you never came." Um, ok, cool, way to be passive aggressive. SO yeah, no hand me downs.

    If I had bags of stuff waiting for someone to pick up and I was in pregnancy nesting mode, AND it had been a month I would assume you didn't want it anymore and I'd want it out of my house....I think you are overreacting...

    Sorry you had to work (I do as well) but when you were constantly saying Hi to her and still not picking up the stuff, I would assume you were trying to be nice but didn't want the hand-me-downs

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  • We have not gotten any Hand me downs at all, but we are having a boy and this is the first little boy in over 19 years on my mothers side and my fathers side also has all girls! Plus we have been married for 17 years and most of our friends who have kids have long since given away their clothes, a lot of our their  kids are getting jobs!
  • I didn't receive any hand-me-downs.  But, like the pp said, I am glad because I am picky about things and would prefer to have newer things.
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  • We had a lot of people offer baby bathtubs, of all things. We Are borrowing a swing, and my best friend gave me a couple things that were on my registry that she had never used. But that was it. No clothes.
  • We haven't received any.  Mostly because this is the first grandchild, and most of our friends don't have kids or will be using their gear for number two.  A co worker offered some stuff but we really wanted to pick things out and start fresh since we will plan to use everything for a second child as well.  Some clothes would be a nice hand me down but we are receiving plenty as gifts anyway!
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  • image britt1430:
    image asibilrud:

    image britt1430:
    Nope, none. Our neighbor who is about 8 weeks behind me in her pregnancy (a girl this time) wanted to give me her 2 year old son's hand me downs and said to stop by anytime. She asked me about a month ago and I periodically say hi to her/her husband and always ask how she is doing when I see them out front. Well, unlike her (she has been off from work since month 5 while her MIL who is staying with them waits on her hand and foot and watches the 2 year old), I have been working my usual 50 hour weeks and commuting and at almost 9 months, so needless to say, I lagged on picking up the hand me downs. Well, when I finally had time to ask, she was like, "Oh, I ended up donating them to Brazil (she's Brazilian) since you never came." Um, ok, cool, way to be passive aggressive. SO yeah, no hand me downs.

    If I had bags of stuff waiting for someone to pick up and I was in pregnancy nesting mode, AND it had been a month I would assume you didn't want it anymore and I'd want it out of my house....I think you are overreacting...


    Sorry you had to work (I do as well) but when you were constantly saying Hi to her and still not picking up the stuff, I would assume you were trying to be nice but didn't want the hand-me-downs



     


    Um, ok, I don't think I was overreacting since I didn't say anything to her and of course appreciated the offer nonetheless, I was just being honest about how it came across.  I should have added that she is NOT in nesting mode and that when she offered, she was clear that it was no hurry, that the stuff was neatly boxed, and the boxes were in the garage (not in her way) and that I could come anytime.  Saying you're sorry I had to work wasn't really necessary, I was just highlighting that it was really hard for me to actually go inside and visit, it was more a hi and bye as we see each other.  I just know I would have double checked before donating if I were her, but all good.



    I agree that she likely just assumed you didn't want them. It's sort of an awkward situation because some FTMs don't really want hand me downs, but will say yes to be nice. I don't think she was trying to be passive aggressive.

    To the OP, I got no hand me downs for my first baby. I was really the first to be pregnant among our friends. Now that I have more mom friends, my kids do get hand me downs in bigger sizes, and we all sort of trade clothes as it works out. And I scored some awesome second hand baby gear double stroller, etc. for this third baby!
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  • One friend who has two little girls gave me a bunch of 0-3 month white onesies and white side snap shirts, which is pretty awesome because I hear those are great to have.  She also gave us a few gender neutral gowns, several sleep sacks in assorted sizes that were in great condition, and a bunch of leftover newborn and size 1 diapers.  It was a pretty great care package and, even though I typically am someone who would also prefer to just get whatever I want new, I don't particularly care whether a white onesie or sleep sack was the exact one I would have picked out.

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  • image asibilrud:

    image britt1430:
    Nope, none. Our neighbor who is about 8 weeks behind me in her pregnancy (a girl this time) wanted to give me her 2 year old son's hand me downs and said to stop by anytime. She asked me about a month ago and I periodically say hi to her/her husband and always ask how she is doing when I see them out front. Well, unlike her (she has been off from work since month 5 while her MIL who is staying with them waits on her hand and foot and watches the 2 year old), I have been working my usual 50 hour weeks and commuting and at almost 9 months, so needless to say, I lagged on picking up the hand me downs. Well, when I finally had time to ask, she was like, "Oh, I ended up donating them to Brazil (she's Brazilian) since you never came." Um, ok, cool, way to be passive aggressive. SO yeah, no hand me downs.

    If I had bags of stuff waiting for someone to pick up and I was in pregnancy nesting mode, AND it had been a month I would assume you didn't want it anymore and I'd want it out of my house....I think you are overreacting...

    Sorry you had to work (I do as well) but when you were constantly saying Hi to her and still not picking up the stuff, I would assume you were trying to be nice but didn't want the hand-me-downs



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  • image asibilrud:

    image britt1430:
    Nope, none. Our neighbor who is about 8 weeks behind me in her pregnancy (a girl this time) wanted to give me her 2 year old son's hand me downs and said to stop by anytime. She asked me about a month ago and I periodically say hi to her/her husband and always ask how she is doing when I see them out front. Well, unlike her (she has been off from work since month 5 while her MIL who is staying with them waits on her hand and foot and watches the 2 year old), I have been working my usual 50 hour weeks and commuting and at almost 9 months, so needless to say, I lagged on picking up the hand me downs. Well, when I finally had time to ask, she was like, "Oh, I ended up donating them to Brazil (she's Brazilian) since you never came." Um, ok, cool, way to be passive aggressive. SO yeah, no hand me downs.

    If I had bags of stuff waiting for someone to pick up and I was in pregnancy nesting mode, AND it had been a month I would assume you didn't want it anymore and I'd want it out of my house....I think you are overreacting...

    Sorry you had to work (I do as well) but when you were constantly saying Hi to her and still not picking up the stuff, I would assume you were trying to be nice but didn't want the hand-me-downs



    My thoughts too...
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  • Surprisingly my niece sent me three boxes full of stuff really enough to get me through the first 3 months. Should specify my grown niece... apparently my sister and i like to raise kids and then start all over again....She is 46 with 3 over 20 and one under 2 wow right lol.  
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  • As a FTM, I thought I would want all new stuff; From the car seats to the clothes, but I must say, with my sister having a one year old boy she had all kinds of stuff to give me. Swing, two car seats, clothes and a couple of other useful things I must say I am grateful I do not have to buy them. 

    I also have an aunt who is about 2 years older than me, who just had a baby boy in November. I just received a huge box of clothes from her and some of them he never got to wear before growing out of them, so many of them are new. 

    For some reason I thought because this was my first, if I accepted hand me downs(especially clothes) it would take the fun out of being a first time mom being able to buy these items myself. But then I realize that I will have all his life to buy him brand new stuff. So now when DH and I look around in the nursery we are grateful that we have been given so many items.

    This is the first time in our entire marriage that we are getting ready to be a one income family for a while, so I have to get out of my two income mindset and appreciate what we don't have to spend money on.

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