January 2013 Moms

Spoiling a newborn

Is this possible? Since last week my lo refuses to nap during the day anywhere but in my arms. Within 5 min of putting him down he cries to be picked up. My mother has been all over me about this saying that I am creating bad habits. Can you really spoil a one month old baby? Also, is anyone having a similar issue? any tips to resolve it? I dont like to swaddle during the day because we swaddle at night and I feel like he knows thats a sign its time for bed. At night we are getting 5-7 hours. 
imageimage
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

Re: Spoiling a newborn

  • Sound like us! Except add nighttime to the mix for not wanting put down. My son was like that too and eventually they grow out of it. I was always wearing my son around the house in the baby bjorn so I could get stuff done. He loved his mommy time! This LO is just the same. I think it is in their nature. Trust me, enjoy it. One day they will be three years old and won't stop long enough for a quick kiss on the cheek...like my DS.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I don't think it's spoiling them. They have spent 9 months inside your belly listening to your heart beat being right with you. It's what they are already used to. I tell myself and others at 16 I guarantee they won't want me to hold them for hours on end. I am going to enjoy it while I can! I think our parents grew up hearing let them cry it out and dont spoil them! As for a solution...you can try a carrier or a wrap so you can still get things done. Also I put DS down and try to stay right next to him till he falls asleep. Letting him hold my fingers and putting my hand on his chest and usually he will fall asleep. Once he asleep I can get stuff done. GL
    Anniversary Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Watch or read Happiest Baby on the Block. Seriously. It is only 10 bucks for the instant streaming video on Amazon.

    There he explains you can't spoil a newborn. For nine months LO had all of these comforting things. There they felt swaddled and held and rocked and had white noise 24 hours a day. Now they are by nature less spoiled than they were in the womb!

    Also, I would swaddle for naptimes in the day. It will really help LO settle. They figure out day vs night on their own eventually, and you can use a dark room to help signal nighttime instead.

    Norah transformed our family January 6, 2013

    image image image Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • No, it's not possible to spoil a newborn.  My advice to you would be to just go with it (and ignore your mother).  Your LO will grow out of it and start napping on their own eventually. 

    FWIW, DS wouldn't nap anywhere but on me at first either and I did a lot of things that some people would probably consider "spoiling" to him.  He's a very well adjusted 3yo that likes to play independently and has always been a "good" sleeper.  When he was in the stage of only wanting to cat nap while being held I just periodically tried to lay him down on his own (which initially just resulted in him waking up, which was obviously bad because he needed his sleep any way we could get it otherwise he would get overtired!) and when he was ready for it, eventually he did fine on his own.  It was just something he had to grown into. 

    imagephoto 64bf363d-3af0-4dcc-b880-c06326daa418_zps78d8d389.jpg
    *My Blog*
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    photo 0cc607b9-4233-4842-8175-d093f8f92ca8_zps7cc00875.jpg
    10/50 Read

    my read shelf:
    Stephanie's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • image luvindanimals:
    I don't think it's spoiling them. They have spent 9 months inside your belly listening to your heart beat being right with you. It's what they are already used to. I tell myself and others at 16 I guarantee they won't want me to hold them for hours on end. I am going to enjoy it while I can! I think our parents grew up hearing let them cry it out and dont spoil them! As for a solution...you can try a carrier or a wrap so you can still get things done. Also I put DS down and try to stay right next to him till he falls asleep. Letting him hold my fingers and putting my hand on his chest and usually he will fall asleep. Once he asleep I can get stuff done. GL

    Yes

    Also, I have to say, the first place I was able to get DS to nap successfully that wasn't while I was holding him/wearing him was on our bed and I used the same trick of laying my hand on his chest to keep him sleeping.  I think it helped to transition him to napping on his own because the bed smelled like me and he knew I was right there with him.  He would sleep overnight okay, but he was adjacent to our bed and I was right there where he could still hear me and sense me, you know?  

    I'm a big believer in the "4th trimester".  The first few months are definitely a time of transition and your LO needs to be comforted by your presence as much as possible!

    imagephoto 64bf363d-3af0-4dcc-b880-c06326daa418_zps78d8d389.jpg
    *My Blog*
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    photo 0cc607b9-4233-4842-8175-d093f8f92ca8_zps7cc00875.jpg
    10/50 Read

    my read shelf:
    Stephanie's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • Thanks for the responses, these help a lot and are very encouraging! I appreciate it. 
    imageimage
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I agree...you cannot spoil a newborn. You can spoil a 1 year old...or a 33 year old!

    Henry Cavill...You're welcome!

    image

    image

    Anniversary



  • I really don't think you can. And either way. If u wanna spoil LO. Go for it lol
    AnniversaryBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I agree with the response about The Happiest Baby on the Block! I just got the book and it has already made a HUGE difference!! You cannot spoil a newborn. The book explains that you need to recreate their experience in the uterus during the first three months. I started swaddling during the day after I read this book and now she will nap in her bassinet now. The Happiest Baby on the Block has been a life saver!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image Goldsgirl9:
    Is this possible? Since last week my lo refuses to nap during the day anywhere but in my arms. Within 5 min of putting him down he cries to be picked up. My mother has been all over me about this saying that I am creating bad habits. Can you really spoil a one month old baby? Also, is anyone having a similar issue? any tips to resolve it? I dont like to swaddle during the day because we swaddle at night and I feel like he knows thats a sign its time for bed. At night we are getting 5-7 hours. 

    I am in the exact same boat as you. The last few days she only wants to nap on me or in the stroller during a walk. I also only swaddle at night and I dont want to swaddle at naps in case it messes things up.

     

    I agree that you cant spoil a nb but there is such pressure to have a good sleep asap. for now, she is just going to nap with me and every day i will try putting her down during one nap to see how things go.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I don't think that doing whatever it takes to ensure LO naps is spoiling.  My LO is the same way although he occasionally does nap in his swing (primarily if DH puts him in it).  I find that he even seems to like napping next to me, so that if I am on the couch I can lay him down at my side and get some things done on the computer.  
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Me!! I'm trying to use it as a way to teach him day vs night. He will fall asleep in my arms but I put him down in his crib after a few minutes. If he wakes up, that's fine because it is day.

    BPF 1. Baby Girl "Petri" 12/22/11 Said goodbye 12/27/11

    BPF 2. Baby Boy "Roo" 1/20/12 Heartbeat 160b/m 2/15/12 Said goodbye 2/20/12

    BPF 3. Rainbow Baby Boy "Creed"  4/28/12 Born healthy and alive 1/5/13

    BFP 4. "Rainbow 2.0" 8/17/14 due 4/28/15

     

    "Darling don't be afraid. I have loved you a thousand years. I love you a thousand more."

     

    imageimageimage

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • image emja0214:
    I agree with the response about The Happiest Baby on the Block! I just got the book and it has already made a HUGE difference!! You cannot spoil a newborn. The book explains that you need to recreate their experience in the uterus during the first three months. I started swaddling during the day after I read this book and now she will nap in her bassinet now. The Happiest Baby on the Block has been a life saver!

     

    I don't think the time of swaddling matters. Like PP said, I've found swaddling lets him sleep more soundly...day or night.

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I agree with all the previous posts. They do grow out of eventually. My DD was the same way and somehow we worked it all out! She's a good sleeper (in her own bed) at 3. Hang in there!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • We had our 2-month pediatrician appointment today and were given a milestones/"what to expact" fact sheet for development between now and her next appointment at 4 months.  It says specifically "you can not spoil a child at this age" and encourages holding and cuddling.  The 1-month sheet said the same thing.

    My mom loves these - says it makes her feel better about wanting to hold her all the time!  

    image  image  image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • Our local baby expert who leads our Mommies & Me class says that you cannot spoil a baby for the first 6 months of their life.  They need the bonding with you and learn to trust you this way as well.

    Also, search on YouTube to watch "The Happiest Baby on the Block".  It's a great video!  The 4th trimester concept is pretty amazing and right on.

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards