May 2013 Moms

Talk to me about Csections and vistors!

So the possibility of a Csection has come up, and I'm wondering about visitors afterwards. My sister had one with my nephew, and he was brought back to her room before she was. Her inlaws all got to hold him before she did, and they posted birth stats and pics to Facebook before she ever got to hold him....she had a hard time in recovery with vomiting so she wasn't able to hold him back there.

Is this normal?? Will my baby be back in my room before me? We will def be setting clear boundaries with visitors about posting things on Facebook and forwarding info about baby before we are ready. But I also don't want the baby passed around to everyone before my SO and I get our bonding time. We will be setting the Golden Hour bonding time expectation with everyone in the event we have a vaginal delivery. I will be asking my OB about policies, but our next appointment isn't for two weeks. What were your experiences like?

ETA.... my main concern is with my MIL. She's the type of person that will get ahold of the baby and not want to give him up, even to me. She has long standing issues after beating brain cancer about 15 years ago, one of which is rationalization of things we consider ordinary and getting her feelings hurt about everything.
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Re: Talk to me about Csections and vistors!

  • DD went to recovery with DH before I did.  They got her bathed and gave her shots before I showed up so that I could take her and nurse right away. It was no more than 20 minutes.

    Simply make it clear to the nurses and your DH that no visitors will be allowed in recovery and that you won't be seeing them until you get into the mother/baby unit and are settled in.

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  • DD never left my side. She stayed in the OR until I went to recovery. Then she stayed with me in recovery. No one saw her until she was 3hrs old and I brought her with me to my room.


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  • While I was in recovery, DS and DH went to the nursery where they bathed him, did some neo-natal testing, and he was in an incubator to bring up his temperature.  DH got to stay with him the whole time and after I was brought into te pp room, they brought DS in. Not sure if the timing just worked out or if they always keep the baby in the nursery till the mother is settled.
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  • With my 1st section, I held the baby on the way to the recovery room. With DD2, my DH took her back to the recovery room before I was ready to go back. We already decided that no one was allowed to hold her until I got back to the room and got to hold her first.

    With the 2nd one everyone tried to get my DH to let them hold her but he just refused and said I think Melissa needs to be the next one to hold her baby.

    This time around I am limiting the number of people that are allowed to be there when we have the section. It will only be DH, myself, my parents and possibly his dad and step mom. Everyone else will be allowed to come up after I am moved to my regular room.

    In all reality you get to make the rules, if you dont want people there until a certain time dont tell them you are in the hospital until you are ready for them to come. Otherwise stick to your guns about what you want.

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  • Check with your hospital on their policies. Like where the baby goes. But if I were you, I would discuss a birth plan with DH and the staff. The staff will respect your wishes in most cases but you have to make them known.

    My hosiptal sends the baby and DH to the nursery and then they come to postpartum room where I am sent. I think it is usually after an hour. I don't recall anyone other than DH being in the nursery and holding the DS2 before he came to me. DS1 was premature and I didn't see him for 10 hours in the NICU. My parents and DH all held DS1, but I don't think anyone else did. My In Laws have never come to the births.

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  • Definitely ask the hospital on the tour, if you haven't gone on it already.  My hospital has a 2 hour requirement for bonding....where only DH and me will have the baby in the recovery room, and DH can't take LO out of there to meet anyone, and no one else can come in.  So, I have the reverse situation, where DH and I have two older kids (12 and 14) who I would love to have join us in the room to bond with their new sibling.  However, the hospital said absolutely NOT!  I'm bummed :-(

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  • I had an emergency csection and was put under general anesthesia. My hubby was not able to be there but my mother n grandmother was. After the section ds went to the nursery with my mother and i went to recovery. Both mymother and grandmother were allowed to be in the nursery with him but were not allowed to touch him or hold him. As soon as i came to in recovery and could sit up a lil the nurses brought him to me.

    I think different hospitals have different policies when it comes to this but I would think that if you made it clear to your nurses ahead of time they would accomodate.
  • I had a c-section with my son and we went to the room at the same time. I did not get to hold him in recovery, but the nurse did help us try breastfeeding. The first time I held him was when we got in the room. I wouldn't have been able to hold him before then, I was very out of it from the epidural. My DH pushed his bassinet into the room and I got to hold him then. It was a few minutes before anyone knew we were in the room as DH had to let them know. 
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  • It really depends.

    SIL had an emergency c-section first time and they had to put her all the way under so she was out for awhile and in recovery for awhile and the baby was back with dad a long time before she got to see/hold her.  Her second c-section was planned and no complications so he stayed with her pretty much the whole time.

    I know for a fact that if I wind up having to have a c-section there is no way in he!! anyone but MH will be holding/seeing the baby before me.  I would be pissed.  I would also be pissed if people posted birth info before me on FB.  However I know my ILs and parents and they will completely respect my wishes on this.

    If it is truly a serious concern for you and you do wind up with a c-section maybe you could just not tell them when you are scheduled?  That way they won't even know about the baby until you call them or are ready for visitors.

      
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  • I'm sorry, but I'm responding to THIS:

    "So the possibility of a Csection has come up, and I'm wondering about visitors afterwards. My sister had one with my nephew, and he was brought back to her room before she was. Her inlaws all got to hold him before she did, and they posted birth stats and pics to Facebook before she ever got to hold him...."

    WTF!!!!?????

    That is wrong. That is so wrong. 

     

    My c-section experience: I had one in the middle of the night. DS was born at 3:59 AM after hours of labor and then a sudden need for a c-section. I woke up in my room with my son in there with me. The nurse waited until I was awake and aware before she let ANYONE in my room other than DH. DH held our son in the OR, so he held him before me.... No biggie. 

    I'm telling you---your nurses are your biggest advocates in there. If you relay the above situation to your nurse and explain what you'd like to see happen in your situation---they'll do their very best to make that happen for you. 

    I'm still so sad for your poor sister!!!!

  • I think it depends on your hospital perhaps? I was in recovery and they prepped Talon, got him all clean, and eye gooped, did his stats, wrapped him up, then stuck him on my boob as soon as we could. Big Smile I had a major deal with chills from the anesthesia where I was FREEZING and shivering. We have pics of me wrapped in like 5 blankets and a turban on my head.

    Anyway, my hospital's philosophy is baby stays with Mom whenever and where ever possible. He didn't leave the recovery room until I was ready. They wheeled me back in my bed then my husband got to push Talon back to our room in the little baby bed roller dealio. If you're concerned Baby will be apart, make a note of it and request Baby stays with you no matter what if possible.

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  • When I had my c-section DH and DS went immediately to the nursery for checkup/bath etc while I was getting stitched up. They took me to the recovery room and after about an hour DH and DS came in from the nursery.  Then after another couple of hours they moved us to our room.  We didn't have anyone come visit until the following day.

    I agree that if this is a concern you need to make sure YH understands no one is to hold the baby before you (except him obv) but I really can't believe there are situations where they allow a million visitors into your room before you even get there.  That seems insane. 

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  • Thanks ladies!! You've helped soothe the nerves a bit. I plan to ask my OB at my next appt and the hospital on our tour what their policies are. I definitely don't want things to go down like they did with my sister, and will write it on paper and stick it on our door if necessary. I know everyone is excited about our little guy coming, but plan to make sure no one trumps our own family bonding time or overshares our baby.
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  • Everyone saw LO before I did, I was in recovery for an hour after the c/s.  DH was the first to hold him in the nursery and then when I was finally brought into my room they brought him in about 1 1/2 hrs after he born.
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