February 2013 Moms

DH friend coming to stay. Am I overreacting?

Heres the thing: DHs friend lives in NC, we live in MI. He is up visiting. I'm 38 weeks pregnant, already dilated and have an appt today where I think they are going to strip my membranes. DHs friend wants to come visit us and spend the night. I love the guy, but I dont really want him around when I'm trying to go into labor, plus these last few nights are our only time left together as a family of 3.

Am I overreacting? Its just for the night, but if I go into labor while he's here I'm not going to be very happy about it...

 

Advice?

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Re: DH friend coming to stay. Am I overreacting?

  • I really can't give you any advice, but am kinda in a similar situation and I flipped about it. I currently do not live with my SO, but we are moving in together right after the baby is born - he is literally moving all of my stuff this weekend so we dont have to worry about that after delivery. Anyway, he advised me that his cousin was going to come to stay with him for awhile to get back on his feet. I advised him that I didnt think that was a good idea and that I really didnt want someone else in the house while I was adjusting to being a new mother and if I wanted to walk around the house topless bc my nips hurt then I didnt want to have to worry about this stranger in the house to me. Plus my mom is coming to stay once SO goes back to work to help out for a couple of weeks. Anyway long story short, he moved in this week and I have been assured that he will not be there when I move in. I just hope he keeps to his word bc I really dont think I will have the energy to deal with that right away.

    I do understand you wanting time for just you guys and not having to worry about someone else around. I would feel the same way.

  • Annoying? Yes! I wouldn't like it. But, odds are you are not going into labor tonight and probably have another week as a family of 3... So I don't know, sometimes you just suck it up for you partner as I'm sure you like him to do for you sometimes...
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  • It wouldn't bother me, but I can see how you would be annoyed.
          DS1 - 8/07           DD2 - 2/13           DD1 - 3/11          DS2 - 1/09 

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  • I wouldn't be happy either, but I think you may just have to suck it up. What if you tell him not to come and labor doesn't happen. Just warn him (in a nice way) if it happens to do his best to stay out of the way so you can labor in comfort.
  • Hey I'm a coastlie wife too! Well, I'm a coastie and so is DH. Anyways that would bother me a bit. But at the same time, I think the most I would do it try to call around hotels nearby to see if there are any good military discounts. Even that would seem rude to me normally, but you're not normally 38 weeks preg.

    If you do go into labor, and he's a good friend, I'm sure he'll get the drift and stay out of your hair. I would ask DH what he thinks of a nearby hotel, and if he doesn't like the idea, you prob should just suck it up and let him have his night with his friend. I would take advantage of them doing their guy things and go to bed early!
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  • While I can totally see your perspective. I would not make a big deal about it.  Chances are you will not go into labor, and the whole getting irritated about it thing will be for nothing.  Even though or DH's and SO's are not the pregnant ones, they need a little slack/compromise every now and again too.  
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  • I don't think you're over reacting at all. My DD1 (12) had a snow day today and has a couple of friends over. She seems to think that it would be a good night to have a sleep over. NOT. I'm not driving 3 girls home at 3:00 am if I go into labor. Not that the signs are there or anything, but when the time comes, I refuse to be thinking of anyone else but myself (and child of course). I know it's different with an adult. But it is all about being comfortable and less stress.
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  • Well I let DHs friend stay. Turned out to be a decent night. No labor though. I did go to drs and I am now 3-4 cm dilated, but not having contractions. THanks for the advice ladies!! :)
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