July 2013 Moms

Shower

My sister is getting married in May...so we were talking about my baby shower and she made the comment that anytime before her wedding wasn't an option and the few weeks after aren't because she'll be on her honeymoon (which yeah i get that part).  My mom and her are throwing me a shower for that side of the family- so the soonest time we can do it would be June 22nd (other conflicts in June with other ppl)- which I will be less than a month from being due. 

I totally understand shying away from May but a part of me wants to have one in April for a few reasons.  I could be on bed rest the last month, or I could give birth early or maybe I'll just be to uncomfortable at that point.  What do you guys think?  Also my sis said her and my mom want to do it on a Sunday not a Saturday because they wanna be able to go on the river (its something we do every weekend & I'm too a huge river rat but I figured we'd skip one or go out afterwards).  Now while Sunday would be fine but one of my bffs, prob wont be able to come on a Sunday due to work and she lives 3 hours away.  I tried saying nicely that I'd prefer it on a Saturday so she said we'll just do a brunch (which that's fine but kinda just wanna a say so here).  Also that they were going to do it at our church-which is fine but I have over 50 ppl on my list (just family and close friends) and I had my mind set on somewhere else and I've mentioned it a few times.  I just kinda feel like I should get a say? 

I'm planning her bridal shower and I would have never told her where it would be or what day.  Maybe I'm just a lil hurt-I want her to have a wondeful wedding and I don't want to take anything away from her.  I'm probably just being overly sensative and I def don't wanna make it a big deal but I guess my question is: do you think having one in late June would work- and take a chance.  I'm due July 18th. Anyone else having a shower around a month before?

 

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Re: Shower

  • I think you are being a little bit ridiculous to be up front. 

    June is not too late, IMHO. I know folks who have had showers at 35-37 weeks. 

    Your host/hostess decides on time, date and location. If you are asked you can give your opinion, but truly it has to do with what is feasible for the host. Did you ask your host about a guest limit? 50 sounds like a little bit much for a shower. Honestly, you've given your suggestions and now its up to the hostesses to do what is possible for them. 

    I had my shower two showers for DD. One in August and one in late September. She was due mid-october. It will be fine. You don't have to be in control of this all the time.  

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  • image PrimRoseMama:

    I think you are being a little bit ridiculous to be up front. 

    June is not too late, IMHO. I know folks who have had showers at 35-37 weeks. 

    Your host/hostess decides on time, date and location. If you are asked you can give your opinion, but truly it has to do with what is feasible for the host. Did you ask your host about a guest limit? 50 sounds like a little bit much for a shower. Honestly, you've given your suggestions and now its up to the hostesses to do what is possible for them. 

    I had my shower two showers for DD. One in August and one in late September. She was due mid-october. It will be fine. You don't have to be in control of this all the time.  

    I can agree with you, however, I try and make a suggesion and get my head bit off. I love my sister to death but with her wedding- everything is a huge deal...and I just thought if it worked better for me in April- that we could make it work.  Plus then it wouldn't interfere with their river time.  I don't want anything big at all. No my mom came up with the list. It's family friends and our family.  I invited 6 friends. 

     

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  • image PrimRoseMama:

    I think you are being a little bit ridiculous to be up front. 

    June is not too late, IMHO. I know folks who have had showers at 35-37 weeks. 

    Your host/hostess decides on time, date and location. If you are asked you can give your opinion, but truly it has to do with what is feasible for the host. Did you ask your host about a guest limit? 50 sounds like a little bit much for a shower. Honestly, you've given your suggestions and now its up to the hostesses to do what is possible for them. 

    I had my shower two showers for DD. One in August and one in late September. She was due mid-october. It will be fine. You don't have to be in control of this all the time.  

     

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  • image PrimRoseMama:

    I think you are being a little bit ridiculous to be up front. 

    June is not too late, IMHO. I know folks who have had showers at 35-37 weeks. 

    Your host/hostess decides on time, date and location. If you are asked you can give your opinion, but truly it has to do with what is feasible for the host. Did you ask your host about a guest limit? 50 sounds like a little bit much for a shower. Honestly, you've given your suggestions and now its up to the hostesses to do what is possible for them. 

    I had my shower two showers for DD. One in August and one in late September. She was due mid-october. It will be fine. You don't have to be in control of this all the time.  

    Also, I have planned 3 or 4 bridal showers and I always get the date from the bride and the list from the bride.  Even for my sisters friends baby shower (I helped)- she threw one for 80 people for her...and it wasn't a problem.  Just wanted to clarify that, I told them they didn't even have to throw it.  My husband's aunt offered one for their side, so none of him family will be there but MIL.  I just thought that I had some say so in where it was and maybe when?  I guess I'm wrong- but just assumed that.  That's how it was for my wedding shower too- I just picked the date and gave the list and that's all I did.

     

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  • I don't think you are being ridiculous. There are lots of threads about baby shower ettiquette and timing that I've read. Most say 46 weeks is a reasonable time frame. Also, it is my understanding that you provide a guest list and a possible date that work best for you and then the planning is up to them.

    I understand where your situation I'm pregnant and my twin sister is engaged. Fun times. Try not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy your shower.

    S
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  • I am also due July 18th and have the same problem with scheduling- either April or June 22nd.  I haven't really talked to the hosts, just been thinking about it on my own. I don't have any advice, but I totally understand where you are coming from! It will work out.

     

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  • I don't see a problem with requesting a certain month for a shower. My husband and I currently live on the east coast and all of our family is in MN. We have had 3 showers offered to be thrown for us (which we are very grateful for). May and June are very busy for us. We will be moving at the end of May (with the location still to be determined), my husband will more than likely begin his first full-time job, as a Pastor, so he will be extra busy and of course baby is due in July. I am flying home at the end of April for a family function. I mentioned to my Mom this weekend that I was thinking that would be a great time for one of the baby showers. She is checking with the hostesses, but it would be very helpful for me if we could have one then. However, I will say if they are unable to make that weekend work than I will be happy to work with whatever dates work best for them. Good Luck! 
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  • image PrimRoseMama:

    I think you are being a little bit ridiculous to be up front. 

    June is not too late, IMHO. I know folks who have had showers at 35-37 weeks. 

    Your host/hostess decides on time, date and location. If you are asked you can give your opinion, but truly it has to do with what is feasible for the host. Did you ask your host about a guest limit? 50 sounds like a little bit much for a shower. Honestly, you've given your suggestions and now its up to the hostesses to do what is possible for them.

    I have to say I agree with Prim. I have been to several showers the month before and they've been great.

    Consider yourself lucky here. No one has offered to throw me a shower, but if they did I would be happy to let them plan whatever they wanted!

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  • If your sister bites your head off at any suggestion from you I would question whether she really wants to throw you a shower. I don't plan to have a shower but I assume it is in a similar spirit to a bridal shower. I've thrown those and the most important thing for me was to throw it in a way that would make the guest of honor happy. It doesn't mean she will get everything the way she wanted--if the ideal date or venue doesn't work out we have to find an alternative that works for everyone--but I would certainly try.

    So while it's true that things should ultimately be decided on by the person planning and paying for the party, if they really want to do this for you I wonder why they wouldn't take your wishes into consideration. It is after all supposed to be in your honor with guests that love you and want to "shower" you with gifts. If you really want her to throw your shower and this is the most she's willing to do for you then you probably have to take it or leave it. 

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