Advice please

mrsnorthernbell

Dh and I have just not been on the same page the last few months. I dont know if it's because dd is almost 2 and becoming more of a handful or maybe it's more pregnancy hormones.
He doesn't get home until about 7 every night. I'm still dealing with ms so I'm not feeling great. I feel like I get excited for him to be home then when he gets home he nit picks at everything. Like dinner or dd behavior or about bedtime either way it always seems to be something.
Today he asked if I could try making healthier meals he's been working out and trying to get in shape and I said its not what I cook it's your portion sizes. Then he said that in always making little comments like that so then I realized that maybe its me too.
Ok so after that long explanation, anyone have any suggestions?

kdjudd

Sounds like you guys might need some marital counseling and a little more time alone. Can you get someone to babysit at least once a week so that you two can have some date nights? It is hard to learn the balance of having a new baby and maintaining a relationship with your spouse. It is a stressful and exhausting phase of life. It can be done though and in the end you can have a more satisfying relationship than ever!

vanessaNOV2

Maybe you might be taking his nitpicking too personal? I do that a lot. When dh points out in issue with our kids I immediately think he is blaming me but he isn't. If you can sit down together and communicate openly and acknowledged what each other are thinking/ feeling then problem solve the issues. Or you can get marriage counseling and have them help. I remember feeling so overwhelmed with two toddlers and a baby on the way with dh working late, dh knew I was stressed but didn't know what I needed or how to help until I finally told him exactly what I needed. Which was more hugs, compliments, flowers, praise for doing an amazing job with kids and budgeting for our babysitter to come help me when dh worked long hours. Happy wife, happy life ;

melissa0726

How often to the two of you get a babysitter and get some time on your own?

I find that my husband and I tend to fall into this type of pattern of irritation with each other when we don't get enough one-on-one time.  Even just once a month for a couple hours to go out to eat a dinner (that neither of us has to prepare or clean up after) is huge in helping us to reset.  It's nice to enjoy each other's company for a little while without wrangling our toddler while we're trying to eat and talk