2nd Trimester

How did you come to the decision to FF and not BF

I know alot of women may choose to FF due to possible medical reasons why they couldnt BF, Im trying to weigh all my options, with the intent to BF in the beginning...but once I go back to work I may need to adjust things...Im curious to what reasoning moms out there had that  CHOSE to FF and not to BF...And for those of you who stuck to BF/pumping what are some of your schedules like when you went back to work full time..( I will be going back at approx 8 weeks)  Im sure I would be able to pump at least once maybe twice at work....but there is always the possibility of it becoming very difficult for me to pump once back at work do to an inconsistant schedule..so I may consider EBFing for the first 4 weeks, then alternate BFing with pumping the next 4 weeks to get a stash up that way I may be able to get a few more weeks of breastmilk before having to move to formula,,,,,thoughts???
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Re: How did you come to the decision to FF and not BF

  • I'm a FTM so please know that I'm not an expert at this.... but, I have decided to BF as much as I can and pump when necessary. If you are going to pump at work HR should have a space where you can go do that privately that is not a bathroom. They should also make sure that you and your team and supervisor understand that you may require some "extra break" time to pump and be accommodating.

    I have also come to the conclusion that not all moms can BF, some just don't have the capacity or medically just can't. I have resigned myself that if that is the case not to feel guilty about not being able to BF.

    I know that BFing has a lot of medical advantages (which my kid is going to need). It can also help you shed the baby weight faster, which for many like myself is a concern.

    For me it just seemed like the logical first chose and if it doesn't work out I can switch to FF. 

  • I work PT as a nurse and BF both LO's.  I couldn't always pump at consistent times during the work day, but always made sure that I got my minimum # of pumps/nursing sessions in per day to keep my supply up. 
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  • We only did breastmilk and I went back to work after 7 weeks. I worked a 10 hour shift and had two breaks to pump plus I pumped on my lunch. When I was home I EBF. Good luck!

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  • Unfortueately I work as a Vet tech at a very small animal hospital...a bathroom in a computer desk chair is all I will have..we only have 11 employees total...so I dont have the advantages of most work places...we get breaks when we can...lunch when we are told to go...there is no set schedule for the day aside for the hours you are there..(730-6pm) for me most days...so my goal would be to feed and pump in AM before work...then try my best to pump 2 times at work...but may only be once at lunch on some days...then feed and pump at night
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  • My supply went to hell and my baby's needs were not getting met no matter how much I tried. So, I switched to FF and everyone was happier.
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  • I did breastmilk and pumped for 6 months with DD, then supplemented formula with my built up stash until we were ready to introduce cow's milk.  My employer has a great pumping room for mothers to go that is private and comfortable. I would pump twice a day at work; however in the pump room there was a phone and laptop to work on while you pumped.  It was awesome and a great idea on their part.  So if you're worried about scheduling, see if you can have an office, or a room, that allows for computer hook-ups where you can work while pumping.

    As far as choosing formula, I have friends who chose formula because their milk didn't come in.  Wasn't planned, just had to go with the flow (or lack of).  I think whatever you decide, you will know what works best for you, baby, and your schedule.  Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for your decisions.

  • FTM who plans to BF and pump when I go back to work. I would choose to FF if I physically could not breastfeed or pump and/or could not produce breast milk after trying all interventions/seeing a lactation consultant.
  • image dcandme:
    And for those of you who stuck to BF/pumping what are some of your schedules like when you went back to work full time..

    I'm away from home for almost 11 hours a day. My schedule varies due to meetings, so I didn't pump at exact times every day.  I did it twice a day for the majority of the time, because I had a big supply. It started tanking around 6 months PP, so I did 3x a day for a few months after that. Then he ate less milk plus freezer stash... so I went back to 2x a day.

    Since it doesn't have to be all or nothing, it may be worth a try to just go for it and see what happens. Maybe you'll only be able to pump 1x a day and it'll be half formula and half BM during the day. Maybe pumping will work out great and no issues... or maybe it doesn't work out and you do formula.  You never know until you get into it, so try to not stress about it so much now :o

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  • I FF with DD from the beginning.  We tried to BF, but my milk never came in and DD never did latch on.  We consulted with the L&D nurses and the lactation consultant, but nothing helped.  We tried BF for about a week supplementing with FF, but finally switched over to EFF.  It was so much less stressful on our whole family.
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  • I don't know if I can BF, but here is my decision.

    I am a graduate student in an anthropology department, and I think that most people would be ok with me pumping in a corner or private area, one professor might even let me use her office.  There are a lot of feminists there, and they have been super supportive so far so hopefully that won't change once the baby's born and my performance as a student doesn't suffer.

    HOWEVER, for the time being I am going to give breast feeding the college try.  My son is due in June and it will be summer break until late August.  I will try my best to breast feed him (so long as I am physically able) until then.  If all goes well I will try to pump to continue supplying him with breast milk.  However, the second it gets difficult or frustrating or takes too much out of me to keep going at school we will switch to formula and I will not feel guilty about it.  Some may think this is a selfish attitude, but I think that finishing my degree is really important not just for me but also to be a good example for my son.  My husband is also a graduate student on the "writing up" phase, so he will be taking care of him while I am at school.  

    Whatever you decide it's up to you, and don't let anyone else bully or judge you into doing something you're uncomfortable with. 

  • I both BF and FF my DD.  When she left the hospital she was still a little jaundiced but after a week it never got better. At one of her check ups, her ped did a blood draw and her bili levels were very high. After trip to the hospital for light therapy, scans, and more blood work her levels were not going down. My ped determined it was my breastmilk that was causing it so I had to formula feed until her levels reached a normal level. Within a week she was back to normal. 

    I went back to BF but did FF for the middle of the night feedings.  My DD never had a issue going back and forth.  I was never a good pumper.  I would pump for 1 hour and all I would get was maybe 2 oz. I went back to work when she was 7 months and I would BF in the morning and after work and she would have formula at daycare. I did this for about another month then just weened her off my breast entirely.      

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  • image dcandme:
    I know alot of women may choose to FF due to possible medical reasons why they couldnt BF, Im trying to weigh all my options, with the intent to BF in the beginning...but once I go back to work I may need to adjust things...Im curious to what reasoning moms out there had that  CHOSE to FF and not to BF...And for those of you who stuck to BF/pumping what are some of your schedules like when you went back to work full time..( I will be going back at approx 8 weeks)  Im sure I would be able to pump at least once maybe twice at work....but there is always the possibility of it becoming very difficult for me to pump once back at work do to an inconsistant schedule..so I may consider EBFing for the first 4 weeks, then alternate BFing with pumping the next 4 weeks to get a stash up that way I may be able to get a few more weeks of breastmilk before having to move to formula,,,,,thoughts???

     

    I think you plan is perfect.  We BF, pumped and FF.  We FF'd because we had supply issues.  Many of my work friends would BF then pump while on maternity leave to build up a supply.  My pumping schedule at work/school was 3-4 times a day every 3 hours (but remember I had supply issues, so I was told to do it more often, some people I have heard go every 4 hours).  When at work I had my own office, so I used a pumping bra and did work while I pumped (door closed and locked).

    Good luck!  BF if you can, try to really make it work.  But your not a bad mom if you have milk and supply issues.  FF won't kill the child.  

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  • image dcandme:
    I know alot of women may choose to FF due to possible medical reasons why they couldnt BF, Im trying to weigh all my options, with the intent to BF in the beginning...but once I go back to work I may need to adjust things...Im curious to what reasoning moms out there had that  CHOSE to FF and not to BF...And for those of you who stuck to BF/pumping what are some of your schedules like when you went back to work full time..( I will be going back at approx 8 weeks)  Im sure I would be able to pump at least once maybe twice at work....but there is always the possibility of it becoming very difficult for me to pump once back at work do to an inconsistant schedule..so I may consider EBFing for the first 4 weeks, then alternate BFing with pumping the next 4 weeks to get a stash up that way I may be able to get a few more weeks of breastmilk before having to move to formula,,,,,thoughts???

    With my DD, I used BF, FF and I pumped.  BFing is HARD and takes a whole lot of committment.  I only ended up BFing for about 1 month after I started back at work b/c it was just too hard with my work schedule ( i was constantly running in and out of the office b/c I had to make homevisits ).  I started by BFing and giving her formula at night b/c I was told it would help her sleep better.  DD had no problems switching between bottles and me so it wasn't a big deal.  When she was FF at night by my husband, I would get up and pump so that I would have lots of milk ready by the time I started back at work.  It was easy for me to do so b/c I could pump about double what she would take at one feeding.  I ended up storing about 2 months worth of milk.  After that, she went exclusively on formula.  But as I said, my work schedule made it hard plus I kept getting clogged ducts and infections...ouch!!

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  • I FF DD from the start, and did not have any desire to BF.  I will be FF this LO too.

    I know this is an answer that often garners a lot of criticism, but this is what we decided made the most sense for our family.  

    I knew I would be returning to work full time, and I had seen many of my close friends struggle with BF.  That's not to say that some didn't have a great experience, because some did.   The ones who didn't, however, really struggled.  I saw their pain both physically and mentally.   They put a ton of pressure on themselves, and it was very hard for them if it didn't work out (for any number of reasons)

    I just knew for myself, learning the ropes of being a new parent would be challenging enough, and I couldn't justify adding more stress by trying to BF when my heart was not in it to begin with.

    I also saw a huge benefit in my DH being able to be just as involved as I was when it came to feeding DD.   I know I could pump, if I so chose, and that he could feed her that way.   For us though, it was super helpful that he could mix the formula, prepare her bottle, and get up to feed her while I caught up on much needed sleep.   This was especially true in the early stages when I was still recovering from delivery.

    I am a huge proponent of people doing what is best for THEIR family, and for us, FF was the best choice.   DD has always been happy, healthy and well fed, and that's what matters the most.

    I know it's not the most popular choice these days, but we were ok with that.  

    If you chose to BF, and it works out, that's great!  I hope it does if that is what you decide.  If you chose to FF, however, please don't let anyone make you feel badly for it.   You have to do what is best for you, and remember that a happy mommy makes for a happier baby.  

    Good luck!

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  • When I had DS, I half heartedly tried to BF. He would not latch well. He was also in the NICU very briefly after birth where they gave him formula. I was never against FF but am very aware of the benefits of BF. I was exhausted after labor and just wanted a good night sleep so we FF and I began to supplement with pumped milk. I continued to mainly FF with 2-3 feedings of pumped milk a day until he was about 3 mos. At 6 weeks, I returned to work FT. I have a very nice private office, but I would forget to pump because I was busy so I finally stopped. I didn't feel bad because I felt I did what I could do and DS had the benefit of BM for 3 months. My OB and our pediatrician fully supported my decision.

    There is no doubt that breast is best, but I believe the benefits of a happy healthy mom outweigh the benefits of BM. As a working mother, I would have been a basket case if I tried to keep up with it. That level of stress would have been worse for my son than formula. I have a close friend who is an OB with 3 children. She BF her first 2 and FF the 3rd. She said she is so much more relaxed and happy since she isn't BF. 

    There is no right or wrong answer. It is a personal decision. Formula isn't poison. Do whatever is right for you and don't apologize to anyone for your decision.  

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  • image dcandme:
    Unfortueately I work as a Vet tech at a very small animal hospital...a bathroom in a computer desk chair is all I will have..we only have 11 employees total...so I dont have the advantages of most work places...we get breaks when we can...lunch when we are told to go...there is no set schedule for the day aside for the hours you are there..(730-6pm) for me most days...so my goal would be to feed and pump in AM before work...then try my best to pump 2 times at work...but may only be once at lunch on some days...then feed and pump at night

    I work in outside sales and therefore am working out of my car most of the time. With DD, as long as I had my cover I could pump in the car. If the parking lot is small and you feel uncomfortable just drive a few blocks away, find a good spot, turn on the radio and pump. You can even buy car adapters for your pump :)

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  • with my son I just assumed I would be able to breast feed and made no other plans other than to do so.  I had no idea he would have a tongue tie, wouldnt latch, my supply was low and after 2 weeks with lactation consultants, I could not do it. I put so much pressure on myself to BF because its what youre "supposed" to do. Finally, a lactation consultant told me "its ok to move on from this if its not working, you're not quitting-you're just moving on to a new solution".  That made me feel free from my own self criticism and DS and I could not have been happier after that. He was FF and is healthy as can be at 18 months. I think either way you need to choose what is right for you and your family and dont let anyone else's opinion dictate what is right.

     

  • Thank you all for your responses...Its a desicion I am still working on, I feel torn about it because obviously I know BF has alot of benefits, but on the other hand I do fear the anxiety that comes with choosing to BF and I already struglle with moderate anxiety as it is. My husband is a teacher, and the baby is due June 2nd, so we will basically both have the summer off and will both return to work full time after 8 weeks...I want my husband and I to be able to take turns with feedings etc, but with BF I will always have to be the one getting up no matter what..I am sure im looking to much into the pros and cons of BF vs FF, and I will probally take it all in stride...and see what happens and make my desicion as we go...Thank you all!

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  • Just to reiterate what others said - it doesn't have to be all one way or the other.  With my son, I EBF for the three months I was on maternity leave.  I gave him a bottle of pumped milk maybe a few times, tried to increase the bottles per day as I got closer to going back to work, but he really did not like the bottle. 

    I was a lazy pumper and did not build up much of a stash while on leave.  At work, I had an office and that was not a barrier to pump, however, I frequently had to be in court all day and that made things more complicated.  I tied to pump 1-2 times per day at work, but eventually, around the time he was 5ish months, due to a series of colds, flu and increased work, I couldn't pump enough so that he could get only BM at daycare.  So I switched to part BM, part formula at daycare, but EBF when I was home and on weekends.  When he was 7 months, we moved to a new state and I did not have a job for about 5 months.  He started refusing bottles 3 days after our relocation and I went back to EBF him until he was 13 months (starting solids, obviously). 

    With my daughter, I tried to be a little more prepared and build up somewhat of a stash, but that did not work out so well.  What did work better with her is that I would get up in the morning and pump off one side in the morning before work and before feeding her.  I also tried this somewhat after she would go to bed, but it did not always work out.  This took some of the pressure off the at-work pumping.  I also noticed with my daughter that she was constantly pressing up high on my breasts when she drank, I tried do the same when I was pumping and that was helpful and made the process faster.  I think I pumped with her until she was about 12 months, but I breastfed her until she was 2.  I did end up having to supplement with some formula at daycare with her as well, but not until she was probably 9ish months.  I probably tried harder to EBF my daughter as the one time she had formula before she was 6 months old, she spit it up all over the place.  My son was not so discriminating. 

  • So its not bad to incoorperate formula as well as BM? assuming I can get her to take bottles?
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  • I'm a FTM and will be formula feeding. It's never been a question for me. I just have no desire to BF. I know most people will flog me for saying that, and it's not like I'm not educated. I'm a nurse and through school was taught all the reasons why women should BF. The list of pros just wasn't convincing enough for me. It had points on it like BF babies have less ear infections than FF babies. Or BF babies are less likely to be obese. You get the point. I wasn't BF and I have a close friend who FF her babies. All the babies I know that we're BF have tubes from multiple ear infections. I weighed in a 106 before getting pregnant, so obesity obviously wasn't an issue. I know it differs for everyone and there were about 60 items on that list that just couldn't convince me. I want my hubby to be able to feed baby without me having to pump. I don't want to pump at work. Or BF in public. So FF it is for me!
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  • image dcandme:
    So its not bad to incoorperate formula as well as BM? assuming I can get her to take bottles?

    No, it's not a problem. 

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  • I BF DS for 8 weeks while pumping.  I had a small stash that I used to make the transition to FF.  BF made me crazy anxious and the decision to FF made me just crazy.  This time- I'm not ruling out BF, but I don't make everyone in the house crazy trying to convince myself to do it either.  I don't have a strong emotional drive like other some women to do nurse.
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  • I BFed with my first until I was no longer able to. Unfortunately, that point came far sooner than expected and I had to switch to something else. The thing that frustrates, and even angers me at times, is that mothers are often told that the only alternative to BFing is Formula. NOT true!!! People will spend hours reading reviews about which garbage disposal is best, or what works well for getting stains out, but how many think to find BFing alternatives?? With the many valid reasons for being leery of formula, more women should know that there are other alternatives to BFing!

     Ok, sorry got on my soap box there. Here is a link to my google search "Breastfeeding Alternatives" which lists numerous websites that offer everything you could hope for and more.

    https://www.google.com/search?q=breast+feeding+alternitives&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a#hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=3TW&tbo=d&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&spell=1&q=breastfeeding+alternatives&sa=X&ei=N9INUdiLOIye9QTk-4CYAQ&ved=0CC8QvwUoAA&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.&bvm=bv.41867550,d.eWU&fp=bc25cb2059027dd4&biw=1023&bih=705

     

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