Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

question about teeth and time out

ds has 4 bottom teeth and 1 top tooth, and the other day started grinding them together randomly-i dont imagine this is good for them, but not sure how to make him stop.

when i need to put him in time-out, im not sure where to do it. for example, i dont want to sit him in his crib for it, because im afraid he will think that he did something wrong when its time for bed or naps. i thought about his playpen, but we are traveling soo and will be using that as his crib. any other thoughts?! thank you! 

TTC since 9-5-09 BFP #1 7-19-10 missed m/c 9-3-10 BFP #2 1-12-11 stick baby! BFP #3 9-13-14. First u/s 10-10-14 TWINS!! 

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Re: question about teeth and time out

  • The teeth grinding is common, it was a sort phase for both my girls.

    I'm not sure how old your LO is, but personally I don't think time outs are effective until after 2 years old.  Communication and understanding is better at 2 to explain why they need to have a TO.  Redirection works great until 2 and while you're redirecting you can do some simple explanations of why you are taking them away from the situation.

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  • The teeth grinding phase lasted a few months with my oldest and maybe a week with my youngest.

    I agree with PP about not doing timeouts before 2. Before that most kids don't "get" time out and it won't be effective. With DD2, we redirect or remove her from the situation if necessary. We do time outs with DD1, but we didn't start until she was over 2 and able to tell us why she was getting a time out. At that point we felt they could be effective.

     

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  • Thank you! Im not sure what else to do, because everytime he does something we don't want him to do, we redirect and move him, but he just runs over to the area we moved him from, and he looks at us and smiles and does it again! It drives me crazy! He totally wants the reaction from us! So I was thinking that the TO might work :
    TTC since 9-5-09 BFP #1 7-19-10 missed m/c 9-3-10 BFP #2 1-12-11 stick baby! BFP #3 9-13-14. First u/s 10-10-14 TWINS!! 

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  • I noticed DS grinding his teeth the other week too and it freaked me out! I'm glad to hear others notice this and it's just a phase.
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  • DD has done that terrible grinding thing off and on since she was around 12 mo. The best thing to do is not react and redirect. THey'll grow out of it.

    When your DS is doing that it's because he wants your attention. Tell him that you won't let him do X (I won't let you touch the cords because they're dangerous and I don't want you to get hurt) and then redirect. That's all you can do at this age. They really really wouldn't get a time out. 

  • Good to know! Thanks everyone!
    TTC since 9-5-09 BFP #1 7-19-10 missed m/c 9-3-10 BFP #2 1-12-11 stick baby! BFP #3 9-13-14. First u/s 10-10-14 TWINS!! 

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  • LO needs to learn that XYZ is not acceptable. Once that is learned, any further repeat of XYZ is for attention. I do time in with LO and explain to her why XYZ is not okay. I'll do time in until around 18 months when I'm told to introduce time out by then. Time out should be time based upon their age and in a designated place, ie bottom step, specific mat, corner. 
  • My DS was a teeth grinder but he has since stopped. We did time outs at 16 months or so and they worked for us. Immediate time outs for biting and hitting. Other stuff warning then time out. The behavior stopped. He rarely gets time out anymore. I am one of the few people who feels if they can understand you then they can understand time out.

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  • DD was a teeth grinder for a week or so. We figured she just liked the new sound she could make. Every time she did it I'd tell her "Oh don't grind your teeth" and pop something in her mouth. Either a chewy toy, her blanket, a snack, a sippy etc. She stopped within a week.

    She is about 16 months old now. We haven't done timeouts yet but I think when we do we'll either use a small rug or her little dora step stool. I wouldn't use the crib or pNp since your LO will sleep there. I don't necessarily think there's a specific age it's more of an understanding milestone. So far repetition works really well for us. If she's not supposed to touch something we practice "no touch" or "not for DD" and she's shake her head and say no most of the time. Staying consistent and doing things over and over is what's working now. I'll reexamine other possibility when something different is needed.  


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  • image mbenit4:
    I am one of the few people who feels if they can understand you then they can understand time out.

    Nope, sorry.  TOs in it's true form is to punish a child for their behavior and to provide them with a place to cool down and reflect on what they did wrong.  Ultimately the child is suppose to realize their wrongdoing and learn from their mistakes.  At 16 months a child is not developmentally able to benefit from a true TO.  A parent can fool themselves into believing that their child really REALLY gets it but they really don't.  You will find that in another day, week, or even month they'll just repeat that same behavior they supposedly learned from when placed in a TO.

    At the moment we don't do TOs like you would expect them to.  We prefer to call them "cool downs" because for the most part our LOs are not behaving the way they are to be "bad" per se.  They're either realizing that their actions result in a reaction from you and they're enjoying the cause and effect factor.  It can also be that they do not have the ability to express their needs/frustrations/feelings in a manner that's suitable for us, therefore, the only way they know how is to get upset.  By placing them in a TO you're punishing them for being a learner (practicing cause and effect, for example) or for not being able to express their feelings the way you want them to.  Instead, we place DD in a cool down where we taught her to take deep breaths.  The cool down doesn't usually last that long.  We'll usually follow it by acknowledging her frustrations and provide tools on how to handle it in the future. 

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  • grinding teeth is normal. Your LO might be getting in another or as my dentist said "just trying to see what happens when you do  that." It smooths the teeth and they look a bit less ragged.

    Time out can be done in a special chair or mat. At my niece's nursery school  they sit on a wall. General rule is 1 min per year.

     

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  • image dragon_chica:

    image mbenit4:
    I am one of the few people who feels if they can understand you then they can understand time out.

    Nope, sorry.  TOs in it's true form is to punish a child for their behavior and to provide them with a place to cool down and reflect on what they did wrong.  Ultimately the child is suppose to realize their wrongdoing and learn from their mistakes.  At 16 months a child is not developmentally able to benefit from a true TO.  A parent can fool themselves into believing that their child really REALLY gets it but they really don't.  You will find that in another day, week, or even month they'll just repeat that same behavior they supposedly learned from when placed in a TO.

    LOL, you know what your child understands and what they don't. You don't know where my child is developmentally nor cognitively. If he wasn't able to understand then TO would not have worked. However, he understood it. He got it. Behavior has stopped. His grandparents, aunts, and uncles, they don't do time out with him and yet he maintains his behavior when with them.

    Again, we only used it for harm to self or harm to someone else. We explained why he was in time out. We again explained why you were in time out. Or "do you know why you were in time out?" He would answer. Hugs and kisses and done. My son started speaking at a very early age. You don't know where his receptive language skills are so you can't really say what he could understand.

    Discipline yours how you like, I got mine. Thanks.

    image dragon_chica:
    Instead, we place DD in a cool down where we taught her to take deep breaths.  The cool down doesn't usually last that long.  We'll usually follow it by acknowledging her frustrations and provide tools on how to handle it in the future. 
    Wow, sounds like a time out to me.

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  • image mbenit4:
    image dragon_chica:

    image mbenit4:
    I am one of the few people who feels if they can understand you then they can understand time out.

    Nope, sorry.  TOs in it's true form is to punish a child for their behavior and to provide them with a place to cool down and reflect on what they did wrong.  Ultimately the child is suppose to realize their wrongdoing and learn from their mistakes.  At 16 months a child is not developmentally able to benefit from a true TO.  A parent can fool themselves into believing that their child really REALLY gets it but they really don't.  You will find that in another day, week, or even month they'll just repeat that same behavior they supposedly learned from when placed in a TO.

    LOL, you know what your child understands and what they don't. You don't know where my child is developmentally nor cognitively. If he wasn't able to understand then TO would not have worked. However, he understood it. He got it. Behavior has stopped. His grandparents, aunts, and uncles, they don't do time out with him and yet he maintains his behavior when with them.

    Again, we only used it for harm to self or harm to someone else. We explained why he was in time out. We again explained why you were in time out. Or "do you know why you were in time out?" He would answer. Hugs and kisses and done. My son started speaking at a very early age. You don't know where his receptive language skills are so you can't really say what he could understand.

    Discipline yours how you like, I got mine. Thanks.

    image dragon_chica:
    Instead, we place DD in a cool down where we taught her to take deep breaths.  The cool down doesn't usually last that long.  We'll usually follow it by acknowledging her frustrations and provide tools on how to handle it in the future. 
    Wow, sounds like a time out to me.

    Ah yes, the "Throw all that child development crap out the window because my child is advanced!  He TOTALLY gets it."  There will always be exceptions to the rule and clearly your child is an exception as is everyone else who believes this.  Believe what you want. 

    TOs are a punishment.  We don't make it into a negative connotation for her.  We explain that she's too upset and needs to cool down.  Many people view it as a negative consequence and I didn't want her to think that she was in trouble because she couldn't properly express herself.

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  • image dragon_chica:
    I didn't want her to think that she was in trouble because she couldn't properly express herself.

    This is the thing, he never gets into trouble for "expressing" himself. Like I said before, we only used TO for things where he could hurt himself or someone else.

    If he feels like he got into trouble for hitting then so be it. He should not put his hands on other people in that manner. Anyway, the behaviors stopped. It didn't take long. Time outs are rare at this point.

    There have been no issues of DS hitting, kicking, throwing or biting outside our home without (SO or I) being around since we implemented it. So, I would have to say he did learn something. Again, I didn't say TO were the answer for every child. If your child can understand and you can be consistent then I don't see anything wrong with it.


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