mobile: possible PPD/returning to work
First off I am mostly a lurker but do respond if I have an answer to someone's question that hasn't been addressed by someone else or if I have a different perspective on things. I really need some advice if anyone can help.
I'm not sure if what I have is PPD, I started feeling very lonely and anxious 2 weeks PP after DH went back to work and family went back home. DS got real colicky from 3-8 weeks, It was a very dark time for me and I felt incredibly guilty I wasn't that overly joyful new mother all my friends seemed to be after having babies. DS still can't handle a very long wake time so we don't get out of the house much or he will get overtired and fussy! DH is good at taking LO when he gets home but I'm still struggling. I have been counting down the days I can go back to work just so I can get out of the house and be around adults more. My baby blues or depression (whatever you call it) has gotten MUCH better since the colicky behavior ended but I still have sad times that creep up on me. I feel like at 3 months if it where baby blues it would be gone by now.
I'm just wondering if anyone felt down or sad and it got better once returning to work? I'm holding off on talking to my doctor b/c I think going back to work will help. I'm also wondering if I'm just being delusional and in denial about it all as well. Anyone with a similar experience? I'd really appreciate any feed back. TIA