April 2013 Moms

Worried about baby shower date

When my MIL asked me when I thought we be an appropriate time for her the schedule my shower, I begged her to schedule it in March because I wanted at least a month between my shower and my due date. Well she called the other day to say that she scheduled it for 2 weeks before I'm due! She also moved the location from a hall that was fairly close to the hospital to one that's over an hour from the hospital and in the middle of nowhere. Worst part is, at my dr. app I just had, they told me that I'm measuring 2 weeks early! Now I'm worried that I may not make it to my baby shower or even worse go into labor at my shower and have an hour drive to the hospital.
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Re: Worried about baby shower date

  • I'm so over MILs.  Mines free to a good home. 

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  • That is annoying.  Not to mention, that means you have a very short amount of time to buy anything you want from your registry that wasn't bought for your shower.

    I guess if you go into labor before the shower, you'll always have an "I told you so" to rub in when needed. Okay not mature.  In the same vein, if you insist it be moved earlier, and then go past your due date, she might rub it in forever too - if she is that type of person.

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  • I never understand why people schedule showers so close to due dates!   the majority of my friends have gone into early labor, and this just seems like asking for issues!

    SO annoying.  So sorry.  Hopefully it will be fine.
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  • I agree, that's not a convenient date or location for you.  But, it sounds like it's a done deal at this point.  You may very well have your baby before then and if you have just had your baby, you may not be able to attend that soon after either.  By planning it then and there she runs the risk of it being canceled.
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  • A friend had her baby at 35 weeks and missed her shower. Her husband attended in her place and life went on. Sorry the scheduling/planning is stressing you out but sounds like since you're not throwing it, it's out of your control. Monitor your registry closer to the time and just make sure you have the basics for what you need for when you come home with your baby (crib, car seats, clothes, food).
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  • I also dont' understand this "She scheduled it for...." business.   Who schedules a shower without making sure the mother-to-be is even AVAILABLE?  I mean, aside from the labor issues, what if you just plain had something going on?
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  • image heddy79:

    I'm so over MILs.  Mines free to a good home. 

    Yes

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  • That sucks!  A shower after 37 weeks is cutting it close.  Hopefully you're LO will keep on cooking until the full 40 weeks are up (better for everyone), but it would be a bummer to miss it.  But, its not your party to throw, so not much you can do but remind her its only 2 weeks before your due date and cutting it close. 

    I wouldn't worry about the "you need time to buy the leftovers off your registry"...people make this into a huge deal, but I got all my exchanges/returns/registry completion stuff done in 2 shopping trips on 1 Saturday afternoon after my shower.  Its really no big deal.

    And I also wouldn't worry about going into labor at your shower & not making it to the hospital on time.  As you start to read birth stories of FTMs, you'll have lots of advanced warning that labor is starting!  I started having irregular contractions around 3pm, but didn't need to go to the hospital until about 2am (at 4cm).

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  • There is nothing more fun than washing all the clothes, putting everything together, taking stuff back and purchasing whatever is left needed the week before your due!

    ..Or having to go out and party when your so huge that all you want to do is sleep.. 

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  • image rcantor:
    A friend had her baby at 35 weeks and missed her shower. Her husband attended in her place and life went on. Sorry the scheduling/planning is stressing you out but sounds like since you're not throwing it, it's out of your control. Monitor your registry closer to the time and just make sure you have the basics for what you need for when you come home with your baby (crib, car seats, clothes, food).

    I will disagree with rcantor on this -- date and guest list I would say are the two things over which the mother-to-be should have some control.  If that date really concerns you, you should speak up.  While a shower is a great thing, it isn't worth it if it's going to create a bunch of unnecessary stress for you.  Hopefully you can work out something or at least have a good plan in place if you go forward with this date! 

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  • I don't even get this... the people who are throwing my shower were VERY sure to check with me about the time/location etc.

    My only concern is that my bff who is throwing the party is due Mar 1 and measure two weeks early... my shower is Feb 17 so she might be the one going into labor! But for that reason, she planned it at my dad's house so my step-mom could take over.

    Sorry you have to deal with this

  • image Kate_C:

    image rcantor:
    A friend had her baby at 35 weeks and missed her shower. Her husband attended in her place and life went on. Sorry the scheduling/planning is stressing you out but sounds like since you're not throwing it, it's out of your control. Monitor your registry closer to the time and just make sure you have the basics for what you need for when you come home with your baby (crib, car seats, clothes, food).

    I will disagree with rcantor on this -- date and guest list I would say are the two things over which the mother-to-be should have some control.  If that date really concerns you, you should speak up.  While a shower is a great thing, it isn't worth it if it's going to create a bunch of unnecessary stress for you.  Hopefully you can work out something or at least have a good plan in place if you go forward with this date! 

    Of course the mother-to-be should have control over the date but that isn't always the reality and doesn't seem to be the case here.

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  • image heddy79:

    I'm so over MILs.  Mines free to a good home. 

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  • I don't see why she would pick a date without your consent. She might be the hostess, but it's still your shower. Is there a valid reason why she couldn't do it in March? If the invites haven't gone out yet, I would insist she change the date. I also wouldn't feel comfortable with a shower that close to mt due date.

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  • image JSS1002:
    I also dont' understand this "She scheduled it for...." business.   Who schedules a shower without making sure the mother-to-be is even AVAILABLE?  I mean, aside from the labor issues, what if you just plain had something going on?

    My thoughts exactly.

    OP, I'm sorry your MIL is so inconsiderate. I hope you make it to your shower - but at the same time, I hope you have your baby the day before just so you can tell your MIL "TOLD YOU!!!!" 

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  • If invitations have not gone out yet, I would put my foot down and have the shower moved EARLIER. My shower is February 2 and invites were just sent out Jan. 7.
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  • image heddy79:

    I'm so over MILs.  Mines free to a good home. 

    agreed! My MIL thinks she is going to be staying with us for 2 weeks after the baby is born! I am getting to the point where smiles and nods are going to be a thing of the past!

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  • Ditto. Whoops forgot to quote the MIL thing- mine is out of control! 

    Back to the shower this is going to be nothing but extra stress for you, put your foot down.  My friends are throwing  a friends only one for me on the weekend I will be 36 weeks and Im even a little nervous about that but I am still going to roll with it.  Im more stressed not about missing it but rather that I will be really uncomfortable and wont be able to enjoy it as much as I would if it were a little earlier.  My family showers will be in March however.

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  • I'm sorry she was so inconsiderate when picking the date and location, especially after you told her you preferred to have it earlier.

    A ray of hope though: my shower (for my firstborn) was thrown when I was 38 weeks, and my daughter was a full week late, putting almost 3 full weeks in between the shower and her arrival. I had more than enough time to get things ready. I'm sure you'll be fine. :)

     

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