2nd Trimester

Family Drama

Despite my ever so present baby bump, my husband's family has dragged me into the middle of their wildly ridiculous drama. Some of it has absolutely nothing to do with me or my husband, and some of it has to do with us (only because someone said some very hurtful things to us). This, of course, comes two short weeks after my DR tells me my blood pressure is too high and that I need to reduce my stress. I told my MIL about my high blood pressure in hopes she would kind of mention it so people mind their manners (because apparently Christmas isn't enough of a motivator). Any advice/words of encouragement? Anyone been through something similar and found a way to deal with it or a way to communicate that this is not ok?
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Re: Family Drama

  • ignore it, don't reply to any emails about it..if all else fails, play them this song


    TTC since May 2012; BFP July 31st, 2012; EDD April 13th, 2013 BabyFruit Ticker BabyFetus Ticker Anniversary
  • Distance yourself from them. Sometimes, that's really all you can do. Though I have not had any major in-law drama myself, I watch my sister go through hell with hers. Sometimes, continuously trying to fix or confront things only makes it worse. You've got to just walk away until it fizzles out.

    Also, when they notice, they'll know you're doing it for you & the baby, so maybe they'll tone it down then.

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    TTC #1 since 10/2010 ~ BFP 09/2012 ~ EDD 06/01/13

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  • In-laws can be the worst. I have a monster MIL who I seem to constantly be at war with. Just take a deep breath and take a walk. It's not worth the argument if your blood pressure is high... if this doesn't settle it, or she persists upon your return, your husband should step up. My DH is learning that his pregnant (and always biitchy/standoff-ish) wife cannot deal with his mom's BS anymore. 
  • My MIL is crazy she was causing all kinds of problems. We told her until she can change herself and apologize she is not welcome in our home or around us. We didn't spend xmas with her and have not talked to her. 
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  • I don't have a good picture of your situation with your family, but really there is only so much you can control. What you can do might include spending less time with them, managing your own expectations, and what you say. Beyond that, recognize that if it is a wacky family dynamic, it has probably been that way for a long time and will stay that way indefinitely. Like the others said, for the health of your pregnancy give yourself some distance, or have your husband handle it and spare you the details.
  • Unfortunatly, some people just don't get it. I am dealing with my fair share of family drama right now and no one pays any attention to the fact that I am a high risk pregnancy. The only advice I have is to get a massage! I had one a few days ago and it helped so much! So relaxing.
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  • You're going to have to explain the drama in more detail before I give advice.  All I can think of right now is, "I'm sorry...I don't want to get involved."
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  • We pretty much shut DH's family out when they get the drama bus going. 
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