DS has about 25 people that care for him in a day because he has ASD and goes to both private and public preschools, and a variety of therapy classes. In the past I used to try to give gifts to everyone, all the therapists and aides and teachers and bus drivers, but it was nuts; basically 25+ people. This year I pulled back because it just seemed excessive. I gave cards and hand-written notes to everyone, but only gave gift cards to main teachers and therapists. Aides and teachers who only see him for "extended day" and such I didn't give to.
Unfortunately DS is much more aware this year and when he gave out cards he realized that some got starbucks cards and others didn't. He gave them out yesterday and he said that one of his teachers in extended day "likes coffee, why didn't she get a gift card too, mom?" I just replied that we don't see her that often and we gave her a nice card instead (and DS drew her a little picture on the envelope). But I felt like crap, and I'm sure DS was drilling her why she didn't get a gift card like his other teachers. What should I have said/done?
Also to make matters worse, while I'm having a pity party about how many people I could potentially have to give to, this morning at drop off there were parents going around with BOXES full of gift bags for teachers.