May 2013 Moms

First baby Panic attack

So are there any other first time mommies freaking out yet? I'm 19 weeks and we just moved across the country because me and my husband are both in the military. I know we have everything our baby will ever need but I just keep freaking out! I feel like I have no clue what to do when the baby comes!!!! Thank god we have friends here that have kids to walk us through this!! is there anyone else feeling this yet or am I just worrying for nothing?

Re: First baby Panic attack

  • I will be in about 12 weeks... I am in no way prepared.

  • I've realized I know nothing about babies and have started to collect book recommendations from friends who are experienced and who have similar values to mine. If you want my short list, lemme know ;)

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  • Oh yah for sure. I've been in a semi-permanent state of panic ever since we found out we were expecting. we have no idea what to expect, what we're doing, how we're going to afford it. At least you have friends nearby who can help you out and provide advice. Most of our family lives out of state, my SIL lives about 45 minutes away and has step-daughters but has never had an infant to raise, and none of our friends (at least in-state) have children. Feels like we're flying blind! Everyone says not to worry, but sorry, I'm a big giant worrier and always will be.
  • My DH has some experience with raising his little brothers and sisters but i feel the same. I am signing us up for a bunch of classes.
  • Oddly enough I am not freaking out yet, I don't think it is going to hit me until the baby comes.  I am fortunate that both my mom and my MIL live about 15 min away so I am going to have a lot of help.  Neither my husband or I have ever held a baby or changed a diaper so there is definitley going to be a big learning curve!!
  • A fellow mommy friend told me when I was pregnant with DD that after 20 weeks, put away the pregnancy books and start reading baby books. That way you have lots of time to gain lots of knowledge. Don't freak too bad ladies! You're going to have moments where you think I have no idea what I am doing (hell I have them all the time), but you push through it and if it works great, if it doesn't you try something else.

    Every mommy feels like that, you'll figure it out I promise. It may not be "textbook", or the way so-and-so would have done it, but it will be what works for you. Your baby isn't going to remember if you make a little oops here and there, it will feel your love though, that's what matters!

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  • image acrp:
    Oddly enough I am not freaking out yet, I don't think it is going to hit me until the baby comes.  I am fortunate that both my mom and my MIL live about 15 min away so I am going to have a lot of help.  Neither my husband or I have ever held a baby or changed a diaper so there is definitley going to be a big learning curve!!

    This.  I don't think it's quite hit me yet... although I have the feeling it'll hit me like a ton of bricks once January gets here...

    BFP1: 2/2/2012 EDD: 10/15/2012 missed m/c: 3/7/2012 @8w5d D&C 3/27/2012 miss you, love you always baby Faith
    BFP2: 9/23/2012 EDD: 5/26/2013 Keep growing, baby! Mommy and daddy love you!

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  • I had a full blown, ugly cry meltdown last night while reading one of my baby info books. It just hit me how much I'll be struggling all the while adjusting to changes with my body and I totally bawled for a good 30 minutes. I'm good today- much more calm and logical, but we'll definitely be taking things one day at a time!
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  • Yup didn't hit me until my mom mentioned last week that she was taking two weeks off after our baby is born so she could help me if needed (and she's got a ton of PTO that she needs to use).  I realized then and freaked out.  Haha.  But I am glad she is going to be around!  I know I'll need pointers! 

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  • I have had my freak out moments, but I'm less worried about my child when he or she is a baby. I'm more concerned about what kind of parent I'll be when they start speaking, potty training, etc. I hope that I'm patient and that I give it my all. I'm not a crafty kind of gal, but I want to be crafty for my kids so they can learn to be creative and we make some fun memories together.

    Those are my worries. It can be overwhelming sometimes...but I think it's normal!

  • I was a wreck with our first and felt totally incompetent for the entire first year of his life.  It didn't help that he was an extremely colicky baby, so I felt like I never got it right.  My second was so much easier I felt like a total pro.  ;) Anyway, I think it's normal to have those feelings that you aren't sure what you are doing.  I used to say that Dr. Sears' "The Baby Book" was my bible during the early months with DS when I had no clue.  It has lots of good info about little ones that can help you figure out what's going on with your kid if you are not gifted with "an easy baby" (if there is such a thing).  
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  • Yes! We're doing a military move too, in two weeks. From Hawaii, where I have a huge support system and love my friends and my community, to San Diego, where I know a few people but feel like I will be totally and utterly lost at all times. I would feel better if we could go straight into housing, but there's a huge waitlist, so we have to go out in town. My family is all on the East Coast, and hubby leaves right away for a couple of months, so I'm on my own. Which has its pros and cons of course.

    We can do this! (Obviously, today I'm feeling optimistic, lol.) 

  • The only times I start to freak out now are when I realize that I'm not going to be able to call and ask my Mom questions and when I think about finding day care and what it costs.  I'm sure it will only get worse.
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  • I think the unknown is always a bit intimidating. Even knowing what it is like to have a baby, it will still be completely different now that we have two to balance. With my first, I didn't really freak until the last month. Before that I just wanted it to be time already and at the end I got cold feet. This time, I freak out almost every day...because I am taking care of a busy toddler I am constantly wondering, "how am I going to balance two?!" And when DD is in a very bad mood, then I really start to panic! But I know people do it. I will survive and I will learn how to adjust. Life is awesome! 

    EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves


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