April 2013 Moms

MIL- need advice

 So I get home from work today to the news that my mother in law who lives out of state invited her twin sister (who she didn't speak to for 25 yrs and just re-connected with) to our house fro Christmas Day. Now my mother in law will NOT be in state or at our house, but her twin is bringing up the gifts for my children from my in laws. So that is why she's coming Christmas day....my hubby was on the phone with his folks when they told him this news and he didn't say JACK ***, I am furious with him too, but now here I am holding the bag. And I will be the B*tch if I say no, however I do not want to entertain of have to be up til 2am wrapping everything AND cleaning the house for company. I am so stuck in the middle with this and need some advice on how to nicely say NO THANK YOU. I was debating going to pick up the gifts and acting like I had no idea since I was not part of the conversation this morning. Any help ladies? Sorry for the rambling and spelling errors. Upset and touch screen phone is super annoying

Re: MIL- need advice

  •  Do you even know her? I'd say its little white lie time if you're not down with flat out saying she's not welcome. Say you already had other plans. 

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    Layne-May 6, 2013

    Callie-February 14, 2011

  • image BoatsNHoes:
     Do you even know her? I'd say its little white lie time if you're not down with flat out saying she's not welcome. Say you already had other plans. 

    This. That's a little strange.

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  • I would suggest that your husband go pick them up since he's letting these plans happen. Men always plan shyt and were the ones to execute these plans.

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  • image tondraluv:
    I would suggest that your husband go pick them up since he's letting these plans happen. Men always plan shyt and were the ones to execute these plans.

    This 

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  • Clarification:  MIL invited someone to your home although she will not be there? For Christmas? This is so not cool.

    H needs to tell mom to host her sister instead of shoving her off on you all.

    If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.-Douglas Adams
  • Did she tell her sis to spend the day with you, or jsut stop by and drop off presents?

    Incredibly rude.  I would also say that you have other plans.

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  • She told her sister to come Christmas Day,. no clarifications really, and she's the type of lady to drag it out & linger. But they always send a boat load of gifts. (Usually a bunch of silly stuff just so the kids think they have a ton of gifts to open) I really don't understand why they feel the need to run my life from out of state. I mentioned it to DH this morning but he stated that "I just hate everyone who isn't in my daily life and I need to get over it" which really hurt my feelings and isn't true at all. I make time for his family ALL the time, my birthday is a few days before Christmas and EVERY year his family holiday party falls on my bday but I go and spend my entire night there with no complaints. I am sick of bending to their every whim. His folks will not be here for xmas or even in the state at all so I don't know why they are sending people to my home for the holiday. Mind you his aunt has her own daughter but I don't think they really talk or something, I don't know.

    I thought about being that I was NOT involved in the conversation, somehow avoiding it, but then I know there will end up being a knock at the door or something come 8am xmas morning.

    I am feeling torn, like and I being a selfish, moody B*tch for feeling this way, or am I entitiled to not being told what I MUST do or who I MUST entertain at age 32...it's a little extreme. After tossing the ideas of what to do or how to get out of this stupid pre-arrangment I ended up going to bed at 8pm last night on the verge of tears. Only thing I can think of is that my husband hunts on her land during deer season so maybe he's afraid if he doesn't pucker up that she won't let him hunt there next year...I really don't know and I feel like I am clearly letting this crap occupy my brain but I want to nip it in the bud before it's too late.

  • I am afraid to say I have other plans because it would be a white lie that I would totally get caught in. for two reasons...My kids are 8&9 and would totally tell not on purpose but because my in laws give them the freakin inquisition during their weekly calls. Plus every year on Christmas we call my in laws after the gifts are open and are stuck on the damn phone for an hour...having to go through every gift they bought to make sure the kids know which ones they bought and which ones Santa got them, it's pure insanity. I feel like if they want to be that involved they should just come here, but then I'd be posting complaining about that too I am sure. Sorry ladies for the rant...these hormones this week are totally wiping me out!
  • Ok, first off this is very rude and Id be pissed too. What do you normally do on Xmas Day? You said you can't say you have plans because it would be a white lie. I say MAKE PLANS! Xmas is 23 days away! Find something to do! Have your normal morning routine then do something special with the kids and hubby. A movie, your local city, childrens theater, something so you can call your hubbys aunt and say " I think its so nice your coming to bring gifts and visit although we are doing XYZ at ABC O'clock. This way you can be on a time frame with her. Good luck!
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