Loss

Melt down at the Mall

My husband's cousin convinced me that going shopping on Black Friday would be a good idea... I knew there were a few things I wanted to buy and getting them at a lower price was enough to get me to agree to go to the midnight opening at the mall. Dh & b.i.l's took us and I was in a pretty good mood. I didnt find what I wanted but I was determined to get a good deal so several clothing stores were offering 50% off on all items so I decided I was going to buy some blouses and dresses; didnt happen. Not one single store had a size that would fit me... I left each store so disappointed and I couldnt really figure out why I was making such a big deal out of not being able to find my size. It's not like I NEEDED the clothes. But then I saw the section of the mall where the kids take pictures with Santa and I just lost it... I started crying and felt so miserable right in the middle of hundreds of people just bawling my eyes out because I couldnt buy a shirt? I know it wasnt that I just think it's crazy how I think I'm not thinking about Edyn and deep down I really am.

Has anyone else exprienced something similar to this? Maybe not making a fool of yourself infront of hundreds of people but just an unexpected sob session? You think you're "fine" then out of nowhere, without warning, you're crying.

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Re: Melt down at the Mall

  • I'm still having daily unexpected sob sessions.  Yesterday hubby and I went to lunch at Carraba's and there was a 5 YO girl wearing a fedora.  I lost it.  She was so cute.  My little Emmeline was going to live in bonnets and hats.  Silly connection but she's on my mind constantly so I see her in everything.  Just wanted to let you know you're not the only one crying in public this holiday season.   


    John & Katherine, sittin' in a tree, . . . . Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • Hugs. I am so sorry. I too cry out of the blue, especially when I am places see families with 2 young boys. That seems to be my trigger. I am so sorry. I am thinking of you!
  • I lost my baby boy almost two weeks ago on Nov.13, 2012. I was around 20 weeks. I went to the grocery store with my dh a couple days ago and walked past the baby food isle and started to cry. I had to leave the store and sit in the car till he was done. I think random crying is completely normal and expected. I seem to do it all the time.

  • Yep! Happens to me too! I was having a nice date night with the hubby. We waited at our favorite restaurant for an hour to get a table. When we got a table it was next to three young couples all with their young babies. I lost it but was eventually able to pull myself together after we got a new table.

    I think it's normal and expected to happen for at least several months if not more.  

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • Happens to me as well. I think this is part of the normal grieving process. Huge squishy hugs. 

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

     
    BFP #1 DS born on 6/10/2009
    BFP #3 6/17/2013 C/P EDD 2/26/2014 
    BFP #4 7/18/2013 natural M/C on 8/11/2013  EDD 3/30/2014
    BFP #5 9/5/2013  Praying this is our rainbow!
    PGAL/PAL always welcome!

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  • Sending you lots of hugs. I completely lost it waiting in line at the pharmacy when a very pregnant woman walked into the line. I started crying and ran out of line. It was awful but it triggered an emotion and I had to leave.
    TTC #1 BFP #1 M/C November 13, 2010 BFP #2 M/C April 20, 2011 BFP #3 We lost our baby girl who is forever in our hearts.
  • I've cried at every place that, when I was there last, I was pregnant with Devon. I bawled my eyes out in Ikea the last time I went...I had been on the verge of a crying fit from the second we walked into the door, but as soon as we hit the kitchen area, I lost it. Took a good 10 minutes to get the sobs and sniffles out. It's been three months, but I still have some breakdowns in public. I think I'll be that way for awhile.

    Sending you lots of hugs - you're not alone in this. I have definitely been through that, too. 

    ________________________________________________________________________________


    JJ 12.4.08::Devon born sleeping 8.19.12::Mia 1.9.14

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

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  • A few days before Corbin's funeral I had to go out and buy something to wear for the ceremony.  Thankfully my mom went with me so I could just sit in the fitting room and bawl my eyes out and she brought me things to try on.  I hated that nothing fit and the reason I was buying something in the first place.

    I don't go to Target for the same reason.  I went the day after Christmas last year and lost it.  Decided I'd try to go again before we went on vacation with my DH.  It had been 10 months.  I knew the layout of the store so I figured if I did it systematically I'd be alright - well, they changed the store around so we ended up walking by the baby stuff.  I started crying and saying "he'd look so cute in that!"  

    I'm almost a year out and there's still the random crying.  Grief sucks.

     

    In memory of Corbin Scott 10/28/11-12/3/11. Heaven got another angel the night you left this world behind Heaven got a little better the day it took you away from me Missing you tonight, see you again sometime For now I'll close my eyes and dream of heaven tonight I'll love you forever I'll like you for always Now and Forever My baby you'll be

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  • I'm so sorry, it just so horrible that you are going through this. 

    Shortly after my loss DH and I had to go to the mall, I needed something for a wedding and I had no idea what size I was.  It was so depressing that everything I thought would fit was too small.  Once we got back in the car I couldn't hold back anymore and I just lost it.  I should have had my daughter with me.  It was so hard.  

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    BFP #1 Jan. 2011 - mmc Mar. 2011 
    BFP #2 Aug. 2011 - My sleeping angel Stella, born April 21, 2012 
    BFP #3 Nov. 2012 - mmc Dec. 2012
    BFP #4 April 2013 - mc May 2013
    BFP #5 Sept. 2013 - EDD 5.24.14
  • I understand COMPLETELY.  My husband and I took our loss pretty hard but are not always very emotional people.  Well - two days after my D&C we decided to do some Christmas shopping since we had the day off anyway.  After we left the mall exhausted and distraught about not finding anything and not being in the mood after we got there - my husband turned and looked at me and said "Is there a baby parade going on that we don't know about?".  I couldn't help but laugh because I knew he was feeling the same thing I was, but then we just sat there and cried it out for awhile.  It's crazy how hypersensitive you get to certain things.
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