Stay at Home Moms

If you went to college...

Occasionally I think about whether, if I had known that I would become a SAHM, I would have made the choice to go to college or not.

I like to think I would have - I really enjoyed college for the most part and I'm sure I got more out of it than just what I would use if I had continued working.

Still, did it make sense to go and to get a degree? There were 5 years between graduation and now being a SAHM; I enjoyed working, but we've always been comfortable on DH's salary (we got engaged before I even graduated), and I do still pay some student loans every month.

I don't know if I will go back to work at some point or not, so I do think it's good to have the degree.

Just curious how others feel.  When you were in college, did you ever think about whether you would work for a long time or did you know you'd like to have kids and stay home with them?  Do you ever feel like you're "wasting" your degree, or was the whole college experience worth it?

I like to think I bettered myself by going, even if I'm not actively using my degree right now...


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Re: If you went to college...

  • No regrets.

    I loved college.  I loved my job.  I love being home.  Working and homemaking were always both on the table once we decided to have kids.  And my degree is in business and education.  I run my household like a business in many respects, and I educate my child.  So I feel like it comes in pretty handy.

    Preemie Resources: http://preemiemomblog.blogspot.com/

    DD1: BFP July 2010...HG in first tri, MC delivered vaginally at 18 weeks October 2010

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    DD2: BFP January 2013...P17 shots, delivered via VBAC at 39 weeks
  • I was never planning to be a SAHM. Most of my college friends are actually surprised that I'm a SAHM. I was so career driven.

    I worked for 10 years before becoming a SAHM. My degree was well worth it.......

    ABSOLUTELY I would have gone to college even if I knew I was going to be a SAHM. Life is short and you never know what's going to happen down the road. It's a good thing to have a "marketable" degree. 

    image Mommy to Barbara 11/8/05, Elisabeth 5/13/07, Loukas 12/23/08 and Lazarus 09/25/12
  • Zero regrets. I believe in education for education's sake. I went to a small liberal arts college and majored in something that I knew I would never apply realistically to a career (sociology). I loved college and loved how it taught me to think critically - that is a skill you use every day regardless of work or career. I think higher education is extraordinarily important, and also college as a time to grow as an individual - discover your interests and passions, etc.
    Henry 4.23.2007 Elliot 3.30.2012


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  • I have absolutely no regrets. I did not go to college to treat it as trade school, I went to become an educated, well rounded person and to expand my knowledge; having a good job at the end was nice but not why I went to school (which is why I followed my heart and studied history and worked for museums during and after college). DH and I weren't sure until we had kids whether I work work or stay at home but regardless of that we never felt that my degree would be wasted by staying home. Being educated myself will be useful in teaching my children and broadening their horizons.
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  • Being a SAHM has always been temporary for me. I worked for 5ish years after college before DS1 was born, and I stayed at home for about 4 years. I'm now back at work part time, and though I would SAH again if we have a third kid, I will go back to work full time eventually. I didn't know I was going to marry someone who would make enough money for me to SAH, either. So no, no regrets about college whatsoever.
    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • No regrets whatsoever.

    Once accomplished, the education one pursues while attaining a degree cannot be replaced. As of this month, my entire undergraduate and graduate school loans will be paid off, and not for one minute to I think I wasted any money on my education.

     

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  • College was never a question for me. I just always knew I would go. My family is pretty surprised I'm a SAHM. Heck, some thought I would never have kids. I do plan on going back to work someday and hopefully the Accounting degree will still be worth something. Smile

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    C  7.16.2008 | L  11.12.2010 | A  3.18.2013

     

  • I absolutely do not regret getting my degree, but I also used it prior to becoming a SAHM, and plan on going back to work as soon as the kids are in school.  It took a lot of convincing to get me to stay home in the first place though. 

    I was a high school science teacher.  The ones that stick around are a rather special breed.  I've been out for 4.5 years and STILL wake up in the middle of the night with awesome lesson ideas.

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  • I have a masters degree.  And I got it knowing that someday I'd be a SAHM.  So, obviously I don't regret it.  I was working for years and I'll work again eventually.  But I don't think I'd ever regret education for any reason.
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  • I don't regret it at all. I always knew there was a potential to be a SAHM, but I also knew I'd be working first. I loved by jobs and I wouldn't have had them w/o a degree. I also loved my college experience - I learned a lot in the classroom and w/ my leadership extra-curriculars. I am also now the chair of our alumni council and pretty involved w/ the school. 

    I do think I will go back to work in some capacity later, but even if I don't, my degree was well worth it.

    No one in my immediate circle of friends, including SAHMs, has anything less than a bachelors, so I think it is pretty normal in our area.  

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    E 9.08, V 8.11, J 4.14
  • I always planned on being a SAHM and got a BA. I learned so much in college, not just academically. Education is so important for more than the piece of paper.
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  • I was already in community college when I met my now-husband and we realized pretty quickly I would always be a SAH wife and then mom because he really wanted to encourage my passion for needlework which isn't exactly an office job so I stayed there instead of transferring to a 4-year. I'm glad I spent the time studying. I did 3/4 time completing my degree and 1/4 taking classes that interested in me so I feel much more well-rounded for it. Being at a community college gave me a chance to take a lot of classes that have been very practical to life: economics, early childhood education, several psychology classes, beginning business, etc. Plus, it is nice to know that I DO have a degree if I want to use it.
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  • When I was in college, I never thought I would be a SAHM.  Even after having children, I still didn't think I wanted to be a SAHM.  Now that I am a SAHM, I love it and have no regrets.

    I had been out of college for almost 10 years before DD was born, so I do think it was very important that I went.  Because of all those years working, I definitely don't think it was a waste.  Even if I hadn't worked before having children, I still wouldn't feel like my education was a waste.  I got so much more out of college than only what I learned in the classroom.  

     

     

    Ms. A  - 2007, Mr. C - 2009
  • I was finishing up grad school when I got pregnant with my daughter and the thought of 'why did I bother going back to school again' (for a third time!) definitely ran through my head, but I don't regret it. I plan to stay home until our kids are probably in middle school. After that I'll go back at least part time and will have a good 25 or more years to work so I figure I'll have plenty of time to use those degrees!
    *My Loves, My Life, My Littles*

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  • I went to college to get my nursing degree, so my training comes in handy all the time. I was still in school when we got engaged, so I knew I'd be staying home fairly soon, but I finished because I knew it would be worth it. I didn't get to work for very long before DD (she was a bit of a whoops, haha) but I'll go back to work when our kids are grown up, and in the meantime I volunteer my services for various organizations. 

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  • I went to college then law school. I think it's important that everyone have an employable skill of some kind. Mine is law. I did not know that I would be marrying a man who was so driven and would want me to stay home with the kids. It's not something you just count on these days. So I was going to make my own way in this world for however long. Then I met my husband two days after graduating. I don't have any regrets because I loved school, however my parents paid for all of it. Sometimes I do think if I had to pay for it myself, things could be different or I'd wished I had done something different but how could I have known how it would turn out?
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  • I don't regret college at all.  I'm glad I have my degree and I think it's important for everyone to be educated/tech school or something after high school in some way despite what you choose in life.

    I do plan on going back to work after the kids are established in school and will be glad my Bachelor's is behind me. 



    Natural M/c 12/13/08 at 8w5d 

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  • No regrets here. My college experience made me a well-rounded person, opened my eyes to all kinds of things I would never have experienced, allowed me to get an amazing job where I got to travel the country and have exciting experiences, made enough money to buy a home and a car and support my family while my husband was on furlough for a year. I always know that I have that degree if I want to get back into the workforce. That being said, my degree was in journalism and I do still write freelance for a few publications, so it is still in use even though I'm mostly staying home now. I wouldn't trade it for anything. 
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  • No regrets. And college would be necessary for me to be a WAH/SAHM as that's where I met DH.

    I fully intend on returning to a more "normal" work life once we're through having kids and they are school-age.

    I'm also pretty sure that having gone to college will better enable me to help my child with school work and the whole college process down the road.

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  • I have no regrets at all. I went to school and got my degree in culinary arts and became a certified chef. I got pregnant about a year after graduation, so I haven't had a lot of time to put my degree to use. I don't plan on being a SAHM forever though. I plan on working part time, maybe just 10 hours a week depending on what I can find, and when we are done having kids going back to work full time.

    I loved my college experience. If I could find a way to make it happen financially, I would be a career student. There are just so many  interesting things to learn about out there. 

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  • No regrets at all. College was the only option after HS, no matter what I was planning on doing in the future.

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  • It wouldn't have made a bit of difference. In the first place, I worked for a long time before I got married. I needed a degree to be able to do that. And it wasn't for fun, it was in order to support myself and carry a mortgage.

    Secondly, I take pride in having an education.  It's not just about your earning potential, it's about developing your intellect. I can't imagine that I would be nearly as well-read, or be able to dissect politics or understand research studies or historical impact the way I do now, without the benefit of a graduate and post-graduate education. And although in a million years I would never have thought of what I was doing as a path to an "MRS degree," I doubt I'd ever have married my husband and wound up where I am without that education. He's a smart, educated guy, and he wanted a partner who was educated, as well. I don't think the two of us would have been a good fit if I hadn't had all that schooling.


  • I don't regret going to college at all. I didn't SAH with DS until nearly 10 years after I graduated college and had established a career. I imagine that without having been able to contribute financially to put us in a position where I could SAH that I wouldn't be a SAHM now.
  • I have zero regrets about college.

    I don't know if regret is the right word, but I have felt some guilt about racking up student loans for a master's degree that I needed for a career I no longer do (teaching).  A fair amount of our money goes to my loans every month, and I have had my moments over that.  Luckily, DH is awesome, and always knows what to say to make me feel better - I learned a lot earning that degree that I apply to mothering every day.  And someday, I will go back to the working world, and my Master's degree will be put to it's intended use again. 

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  • Absolutely no regrets. I started working full time 2 months after I graduated and stayed with the same office for 14 years before SAH. I do plan to go back to work someday, maybe in the same field, maybe not.
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  • no regrets at all, as I'm actually still using what I went to school for and it was worth every penny.  you never know what will happen in life.  I was married before and things got crazy and we separated.  I'm married now with a kid and absolutely love what I'm doing, BUT you never know when you may need it again.  plus having a college degree always looks great in resumes no matter what job you are doing.  I've been in a few different jobs that in no way related to my field
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  • I always knew I wanted to be a teacher [like, from the time I was 10] and I also always knew that when I had kids I wanted to SAH with them. When I was in college I said I wanted to teach for at least as long as I went to school, which ended up being 7 years by the time I got my cleared credential and masters degree.

    I was teaching when I met my hubby and actually got married a less than a month before I did my comps exam [because I'm crazy, or stupid] I don't know if I will ever go back to teaching full time but I do value the education and specialized skills I gained and see myself using them in some capacity down the road [volunteering, part time specialist...]
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  • If not for staying to finish up an add-on to my degree I'd have never started dating DH, so I guess in that respect I needed to get the degree...

    Functionally, the degree was not worth it.  After dating DH I ended up working for his family's business which I could have done without the degree and even though I no longer work there, I'm still paying $$$/mo for the student loans I needed to take out and will be forever..  It's a catch 22.  The real kicker of it all is that I've been out of school and work so long that if I wanted to reenter the workforce I'd have to go back to school and take out more loans because my training/experience is now obsolete...

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  • Well, I do work.  But I don't use my BA or my MA for my job.  So I've wondered the same thing.  But I have no regrets.  I liked school.  It made me happy.  And that's where I met DH so who knows where I'd be without it.
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  • image Mrs.Hizzo:
    It wouldn't have made a bit of difference. In the first place, I worked for a long time before I got married. I needed a degree to be able to do that. And it wasn't for fun, it was in order to support myself and carry a mortgage. Secondly, I take pride in having an education.nbsp; It's not just about your earning potential, it's about developing your intellect. I can't imagine that I would be nearly as wellread, or be able to dissect politics or understand research studies or historical impact the way I do now, without the benefit of a graduate and postgraduate education. And although in a million years I would never have thought of what I was doing as a path to an "MRS degree," I doubt I'd ever have married my husband and wound up where I am without that education. He's a smart, educated guy, and he wanted a partner who was educated, as well. I don't think the two of us would have been a good fit if I hadn't had all that schooling.
    This.

    My education and degrees were for me, they made me a better person. DH is extremely intelligent, and I doubt he would have married me if we were not matched on that front. DH and I both have masters degrees. FWIW I never would have married a man without a college degree. Growing up college was not an option, it was the next logical step after highschool, as it will be for my kids.
    Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.
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