April 2012 Moms

Leaving DD overnight

In December, my little sister is having her bridal shower/bachlorette party.  She really wants me to go out and party (I do want to go).  However H works that weekend so I will be taking DD with me.  My mom said she would just stay at the hotel and watch DD but sister wants her to go out also.  She is pressuring me to leave DD with my IL's.  (All of this is taking place about 2 hour drive from my house and IL live in a different town also would have to travel to watch DD) 

I am EBF (so pumping enough for an entire day/night would be a PITA) and have never left DD overnight. I would MAYBE be ok with leaving her with H but he works nights so thats not an option.  Our other sister has been leaving her son overnight since he was about 3 months so I'm wondering if maybe I am to extreme. 

Has anyone else left thier little ones over night?  How should I handle this?

Re: Leaving DD overnight

  • You situation sounds difficult, but I have left LO twice over night, its hard but she was fine and I was glad to get some time to do something fun.

    Can DH take LO to his inlaws so you don't have to do the extra driving? I'm sure you would enjoy getting out and having some fun!

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  • Well I am the extreme I have never left S overnight and don't plan on doing that anytime soon!! I have only been away from him 3 times totally 2 hours!!! I am going to be a wreck when I go back to work!!
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  • I think it's different for everyone on how comfortable they are with leaving their baby overnight. I would be fine with DH or my mom keeping her overnight although I would prefer it be DH. Definitely not my IL's.

    So in the evening is it the bachelorette party that your little sister wants your mom to go to? I am thinking traditional stuff in my head and usually the mom's don't come out to that - but maybe I am wrong. To me it sounds like the idea of having your mom stay with LO while you go out seems most comfortable and convenient for you. Talk to your sister and see what the plans are. Don't compare yourself to your other sister who has already left her baby overnight, everyone is different and has their own comfort level. End of story!

    Lillian April 17, 2012
  • I must be the extreme too. I've only left DD with my parents and Dh for longer than an hour. She does go to the gym daycare once a week for an hour but I'm right there if she needs me. I'm no where near ready to leave her overnight.

    I say, your baby, your rules. If you aren't ready to leave lo, then don't. I'm a firm believer that I'll know when I'm ready.
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  • Your situation isn't fun... I've let A overnight once, only about 2 weeks ago, and that was with my Mom. She is the only person (other than DH, obviously) who I will leave A overnight with.
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  • I also EBF, and we left Micah with my parents over night once at 4 months because DH was the best man in a wedding. I wasn't thrilled, but it was good for everyone. I was able to pump in the car twice at the wedding (once right before the service, and once in the middle of the reception - all held at the same location). I took my cooler bag in the reception with me because it was a summer wedding. Then I set an alarm clock for every 3 hours at night to pump then, too. I can go 6 hours before it gets uncomfortable, so another part of your issue is how long can you go without pumping? Is there a place that you can have the privacy you need to pump? Do you have enough of a freezer stash to even give LO up for the night?

    I'm lame, so I would probably come out for a little, but not spend the night. I would see if my mom could switch parts of the night with me so that there was 100% baby coverage. You could even still stay out there and get a room with you and the baby so you can do any morning/breakfast activities, it might be worth it, but the pumping dilema would probably be my biggest hold up.

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  • thanks ladies!! I'm glad I am not the only one who hasn't left LO overnight.  I talked to H and he agrees he is not comfortable leaving DD overnight with his parents.  I would be 2.5 hours away and he would be atleast an hour and unable to leave work anyways.  Looks like I'll go out for a few drinks and then let my mom go out and party with the girls.  I'm to lame to stay out anyways haha

     

  • Leia stayed over night with my sister at 3 weeks.
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  • I've left mine a few times already. It was a nice break for me and my husband. 
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  • I'm leaving the kids overnight at home with DH this weekend while I visit a friend for a LONG overdue visit and my parents are taking the kids to their house about 2 hours from here in December so we can go out for my birthday. But I wouldn't leave them with my ILs - they live far from us, drink a lot, and only see the kids a few times a year so I wouldn't be comfortable with it. The pumping will be a pain since I only have a single, but the trip this weekend will be less than 24 hours and he doesn't nurse overnight anyway, so I'm hoping it won't be too bad.

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  • I have a hard enough time leaving her with DH while I go to work for 8 hours. I wouldn't go but that's me. I could care less about going out and partying especially if the entire time I would be thinking about the baby and wondering how she is.
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  • I've never left her overnight and wouldn't be ready to. If it were me I just wouldn't go, because like PP said, I'm not really interested in going out/partying any more anyway.

    Hubby and I had one date night since she was born, and I did have fun and a few drinks. I can go a good amount of hours without pumping though, I guess I have good "storage" ha. We also had a wedding a few weeks ago that we had to drive to and spend a weekend, but the baby came too. The EBF makes drinking annoying anyway, it's like I'd rather just have 1-2 beers and not bother trying to figure out pumping and such.

    I may be overly soppy, but I can't imagine waking up in the morning without her. Not yet. I'm not ready.

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  • I have never left ds overnight either but I almost did. We went to a wedding and I left the baby with a friend and after the after party I took a cab to be with ds when he woke up. Insleptvat the friends house while dh stayed in a hotel. I would miss him too much. 
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