October 2012 Moms

Is nothing sacred anymore??

Is nothing sacred anymore??

MIL just called me to tell me that her sister (the midwife) called her and that my SIL also spoke to her and that all three of them have decided that I need to have sex so this baby can come out. I very nicely explained to her that DH and I spoke about this and that we both (for our own personal reasons) don't feel comfortable with having sex right now and that I have been having some pain during internals, etc, so that though I appreciate her suggestions, sex is not really an option for us at this time.

Her answer? "well, thats what I did with my kids and it worked, and we think you should just do it"

I called DH immediately. I have a great relationship with MIL, but I am seriously exhausted of the sex comments. I would like to think that, though its obvious DH and I have had sex in the past (duh!), some things are still sacred between a married couple, and that I would like to leave it as such.

Whyyyyyyy!??!?!?! 


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Re: Is nothing sacred anymore??

  • Ugh. I wouldn't have even discussed it with her. I'd tell her the baby will come when ready!
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  • I'll be honest, first thing that comes to mind is oh, sex can help it along?  lol.  But I agree, we haven't had it for several weeks now because it's just too uncomfortable and awkward and it does nothing for me.  Thankfully I hadn't had any sex comments from people, but I'd be mortified truthfully.  I'd tell them thanks for your concern, but when the baby's time is here it'll happen. 

    Besides, just because it helped them doesn't mean it'll help you.  I'm so glad I'm separated now from those people who kept telling me this and that about pregnancy, delivering, labor, etc...all day it'd be their stories that will omg definitely apply to me!  Shut up people.

  • At least she didn't ask you if you were doing nipple stimulation...Indifferent

    Seriously, though, people should just butt out. 



  • I wouldn't have even talked about it...a simple nod and "thanks for the suggestion" would have ended the topic of conversation - no need to defend YOUR decisions on YOUR body and YOUR child =)
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  • image Rochell:
    I wouldn't have even talked about it...a simple nod and "thanks for the suggestion" would have ended the topic of conversation - no need to defend YOUR decisions on YOUR body and YOUR child =)

    Yes

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  • My MIL has said some of the same when DH and I are both around and he usually handles it with "Baby will come when he's ready." She continues to call/text daily to see if we're in labor and suggesting we get things moving but thankfully she doesn't call/text me directly. DH is a great buffer. Maybe utilize ur DH as a buffer?
  • Wow! She needs to learn some boundaries! Honestly though, I wouldn't have even explained to her why that wasn't an option - it's none of her business what you and DH do in the bedroom. Can your DH talk to her about how inappropriate her comments are?
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  • This is the third time she does this... I figured that nicely explaining it to her one last time would do the trick. Unfortunately, she is home all day during her chemo so she calls me every.sigle.day. I love her, but I feel like I can't breathe anymore!

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    Married my best friend 09.18.11
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    Baby E born 10/18/12. 8.5lbs and 21in of pure perfection!

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  • Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

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  • image Rochell:
    I wouldn't have even talked about it...a simple nod and "thanks for the suggestion" would have ended the topic of conversation no need to defend YOUR decisions on YOUR body and YOUR child =


    This. Discussing sex with my MIL?! Uh, no.
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  • image jessican08:

    Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

    Best response ever! LOL

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  • She shouldn't know if you are or aren't.
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    Daughter b. Oct 12 January Siggy Challenge Favorite Moment of 2012 My zombie 5th anniversary.
  • I agree with PPs - I would've said something like "Thanks for the tip" and left it at that.  No need to tell others what goes on behind your bedroom doors.  If MIL asked, I'd simply reply "Do you really want to know about your son's sex habits?"


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  • I don't think I would have even answered her or perhaps a polite thanks for the advice, end of subject.  

    I don't discuss my sex life with anyone other than DH because well.... it's really nobody else's business what DH and I do in the bedroom.

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  • My mom told me and dh this yesterday. My dad faked a phone call and walked out. It's one thingfor him to obviously know we have sex. It's another to have to hear about how his only child, a daughter, should be having sex.
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  • image lovesgummies:
    Ugh. I wouldn't have even discussed it with her. I'd tell her the baby will come when ready!


    This!
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  • Ummmm that's way personal. I would've hung up on them!
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  • image jessican08:

    Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

    *snort.*

    Epic. I love it! 


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    I am ellcore's betch.

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  • I'm close with my MIL too...but that is crossing a LINE, seriously.

    ?Married 11-1-08 ~ dxPCOS 9-1-11 ~ BFP 2-14-12 ~ T.J. born 11-1-12? Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie First Birthday tickers Tanner James The  BoysWedding Shot
  • image jessican08:

    Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

    hahaha this is an awesome response. And ew, that's not a conversation I would EVER want to have with my MIL!

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  • When my mom was visiting last week, she asked if I wanted her to go for a drive so we can have some "alone time." When she was on the way here, she said we needed to "have a rumble in the hay" to get things going. Def on the list of things I don't want to hear from my mother.
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  • image ellcore:

    image Rochell:
    I wouldn't have even talked about it...a simple nod and "thanks for the suggestion" would have ended the topic of conversation - no need to defend YOUR decisions on YOUR body and YOUR child =)

    Yes


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  • image misscheapandchic:
    Ummmm that's way personal. I would've hung up on them!

    yes! SO awkward! At least my MIL is in london and can only whatsapp me - i'd be mortified to have this conversation on the phone.

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  • image Mrschica:
    This is the third time she does this... I figured that nicely explaining it to her one last time would do the trick. Unfortunately, she is home all day during her chemo so she calls me every.sigle.day. I love her, but I feel like I can't breathe anymore!

    Sorry labor buddy!

    My MIL was calling me constantly too until we kind of got into a fight and I said she was rude as I was walking away and she heard. Embarrassed  Before that I just didn't always pick up the phone.  Yes she might freak out that you might be in labor or something, but you have to draw the line somewhere.  My MIL likes to tell me about how much she drank and smoked when PG with DH.   She admits she should have quite smoking, but she doesn't see anything wrong with the drinking part.

    There are just somethings that you won't see eye to eye on and for the most part I just try to let it go, as hard as that may be.  I'd definitely let YH handle most of it!

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  • image rachelmichelle1:
    image jessican08:

    Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

    *snort.*

    Epic. I love it! 

    And if possible, make sure you get MIL on video when you do this, you could easily get a million views on youtube. 

    D & R were born at 37w5d.

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  • You should have told her that you guys have been sticking to anal since the vaginal is too uncomfortable and asked her if she thought it would have the same effect ;)
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  • image jessican08:

    Whoa - that's really awkward. You should tell her that you would but your H is so big, and because he likes it rough, it just hurts too much. Make sure you do this in person though so you can tell us what shade of crimson she turns Stick out tongue

    Be careful asking personal questions - you might get a personal answer!

    THIS! HA!

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  • I think I would have just immediately punched my MIL in the face for that comment.
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