1st Trimester

Goodbye (kind of long) :(

As much as it hurts me to do so, I've decided to leave The Bump. A couple of weeks ago I made a horrible newbie mistake of posting a BFP announcement in two TTC boards in which I wasn't an active member. It caused a lot of turmoil and hurt feelings. I felt terrible for my mistake. I tried apologizing as much as I could, but the damage has been done.  

Since then I've moved to the 1st Trimester board and I've been an active member here for the past 2 weeks. At the same time, I've still been keeping an eye on the TTC boards but never posting anything. Today I posted a comment here asking if it was appropriate for me to answer a few questions asked by women on the TTC boards with an intention to help. Shortly after that post I realized that I might get some negative feedback for even considering that, so I deleted my post. That caused another fiasco with someone bringing up my mistake from 2 weeks ago. That made me realize that some women here will never forget or forgive me, which is completely understandable :(

I love The Bump and the women here are just amazing, but seeing how much stress this brings me on top of my pregnancy-related hormonal mood swings, I've decided to protect my LO and just resign. 

It's been a great experience, ladies! Thank you so much for your support and for answering my numerous questions. I wish all of you the best of luck and health!! :)

Goodbye! 

Re: Goodbye (kind of long) :(

  • The ladies on the TTC board are a little whacky. Ignore them stay on 1st tri.
    TTC since May 2012; BFP July 31st, 2012; EDD April 13th, 2013 BabyFruit Ticker BabyFetus Ticker Anniversary
  • image RussianMommy:
    The ladies on the TTC board are a little whacky. Ignore them stay on 1st tri.

    Oh yeah, because everyone on 1st tri is a gem. ::snort:: 



  • No, I'm just saying if she's having issues on another board to just ignore them and stay on first tri because I don't know the whole story. I'm just reading this.
    TTC since May 2012; BFP July 31st, 2012; EDD April 13th, 2013 BabyFruit Ticker BabyFetus Ticker Anniversary
  • image RussianMommy:
    No, I'm just saying if she's having issues on another board to just ignore them and stay on first tri because I don't know the whole story. I'm just reading this.

     

    The second "incident" from this morning was on this board. I'm sure it wouldn't have been a big deal for anyone else, but unfortunately I don't have thick skin and take everything close to heart. I just think it'd be best to minimize stress this early in the pregnancy.

    On a completely and totally random topic, I am also from Russia! :) 

  • I just don't understand any of this.  You feel bad because you posted your BFP all over the 3T board AND the TTCAL board without being an active member there.  I didn't read the 3T thread, but I did read the one on TTCAL -- there are some absolutely amazing women on that board and that whole thread made me cringe.  I don't understand why you would ever do that, but whatever.  Then you ask if the people on this board think it would be a good idea for you to post advice on the TTC boards (for what purpose?  There are plenty of knowledgeable women already on those boards).  You get one reply that states "I wouldn't" and NOW you're doing a GBCB?  

    Does. Not. Compute. 

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    BFP #1: 1/10/12; EDD: 9/20/12, born too early on 5/7/12 (20w4d) due to IC/PTL/chorioamnionitis.
    BFP #2: 8/30/12; EDD: 5/9/13, emergency cerclage placed at 22w5d, dx cardiomyopathy, strict bed rest for 14 weeks. DD born at 39 weeks.


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  • image Claytonia:

    image RussianMommy:
    No, I'm just saying if she's having issues on another board to just ignore them and stay on first tri because I don't know the whole story. I'm just reading this.

     

    The second "incident" from this morning was on this board. I'm sure it wouldn't have been a big deal for anyone else, but unfortunately I don't have thick skin and take everything close to heart. I just think it'd be best to minimize stress this early in the pregnancy.

    On a completely and totally random topic, I am also from Russia! :) 

    awesome. im actually canadian born, but russian background. 

    I sent you a private message. 

    TTC since May 2012; BFP July 31st, 2012; EDD April 13th, 2013 BabyFruit Ticker BabyFetus Ticker Anniversary
  • It probably is a wise decision to stay away from message boards if you can't develop some thick skin. I think you are right, this is best for you and your baby.

    However, being someone who has had multiple losses and was an active member on TTCAL, waving a BFP in front of those ladies really was hurtful. It was so very cruel. Just like IRL, it is wise to think before posting on any board, really. How would that post be helpful at all to those who are hurting and unable to have their rainbow baby yet?! I just don't see how anyone WOULDN'T understand that! 

    Still, congratulations on your baby. I hope you have a healthy 9 months.  

    imageimage
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    EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves

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  • I really hope you reconsider. Ive only been using this a few days but already I feel like this is a great place to find support. Ignore the bad stuff remember the good.

     

  • image HoolahZinger:

    It probably is a wise decision to stay away from message boards if you can't develop some thick skin. I think you are right, this is best for you and your baby.

    However, being someone who has had multiple losses and was an active member on TTCAL, waving a BFP in front of those ladies really was hurtful. It was so very cruel. Just like IRL, it is wise to think before posting on any board, really. How would that post be helpful at all to those who are hurting and unable to have their rainbow baby yet?! I just don't see how anyone WOULDN'T understand that! 

    Still, congratulations on your baby. I hope you have a healthy 9 months.  

    Thanks for your message and kind wishes! I made a mistake on the other boards and I feel terrible for it. I know that anyone with common sense should've known not to do that, but that's why it's called a mistake. I made a mistake. I apologized to the women I hurt as much as I could, but I guess that wasn't enough. Thanks again for your wishes! I wish you a healthy pregnancy, as well! 

  • There are rules to follow on some of the other boards and for good reason. I'm sure you didn't totally deserve the responses you got but you have to see it from their perspective. On every message board people are going to have opinions if you can't take it then no, don't put yourself through been on here. 

    You could always take a break and decide if you miss it or not. Not the end of the world to open a new account if you totally deleted this one. You could start a fresh but just stick to the boards you  "belong" to and be sure to read the posting rules first. For your own benefit.

    Whatever you decide a happy and healthy 9 months to you! We all make mistakes don't be too upset about it. 

     

  • image Maryland Baby:

    There are rules to follow on some of the other boards and for good reason. I'm sure you didn't totally deserve the responses you got but you have to see it from their perspective. On every message board people are going to have opinions if you can't take it then no, don't put yourself through been on here. 

    You could always take a break and decide if you miss it or not. Not the end of the world to open a new account if you totally deleted this one. You could start a fresh but just stick to the boards you  "belong" to and be sure to read the posting rules first. For your own benefit.

    Whatever you decide a happy and healthy 9 months to you! We all make mistakes don't be too upset about it. 

     

     

    Thanks for your kind words! I totally understand the other women. I've been in their shoes and would have also been very upset if someone did that. If I ever come back here, I'll definitely try to be more careful. Thanks again for your wishes. Happy and healthy 9 months to you, too! :)

  • image Claytonia:
    image Maryland Baby:

    There are rules to follow on some of the other boards and for good reason. I'm sure you didn't totally deserve the responses you got but you have to see it from their perspective. On every message board people are going to have opinions if you can't take it then no, don't put yourself through been on here. 

    You could always take a break and decide if you miss it or not. Not the end of the world to open a new account if you totally deleted this one. You could start a fresh but just stick to the boards you  "belong" to and be sure to read the posting rules first. For your own benefit.

    Whatever you decide a happy and healthy 9 months to you! We all make mistakes don't be too upset about it. 

     

     

    Thanks for your kind words! I totally understand the other women. I've been in their shoes and would have also been very upset if someone did that. If I ever come back here, I'll definitely try to be more careful. Thanks again for your wishes. Happy and healthy 9 months to you, too! :)

    That's a great idea. Start fresh OP and learn from those mistakes. I can totally see you are very sorry and have learned a whole lot with your experiences. Use that gained wisdom to encourage and support those on the boards you do fit into. GL to you 

    A little edit here: Thick skin is still needed though Wink Take a break and see what is most helpful to you and the baby.  

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    EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves

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  • image HoolahZinger:
    image Claytonia:
    image Maryland Baby:

    There are rules to follow on some of the other boards and for good reason. I'm sure you didn't totally deserve the responses you got but you have to see it from their perspective. On every message board people are going to have opinions if you can't take it then no, don't put yourself through been on here. 

    You could always take a break and decide if you miss it or not. Not the end of the world to open a new account if you totally deleted this one. You could start a fresh but just stick to the boards you  "belong" to and be sure to read the posting rules first. For your own benefit.

    Whatever you decide a happy and healthy 9 months to you! We all make mistakes don't be too upset about it. 

     

     

    Thanks for your kind words! I totally understand the other women. I've been in their shoes and would have also been very upset if someone did that. If I ever come back here, I'll definitely try to be more careful. Thanks again for your wishes. Happy and healthy 9 months to you, too! :)

    That's a great idea. Start fresh OP and learn from those mistakes. I can totally see you are very sorry and have learned a whole lot with your experiences. Use that gained wisdom to encourage and support those on the boards you do fit into. GL to you 

    A little edit here: Thick skin is still needed though Wink Take a break and see what is most helpful to you and the baby.  

     

    Hehe, I've never been good at NOT taking things personally. I'm sure the crazy hormones that are causing my mood swings right now aren't helping much! I have to learn how to take criticism, though...especially when I'm a mommy and receiving a million suggestions on how to raise my baby! Thanks again for your kind words! :) Good luck to you!

  • image RussianMommy:
    The ladies on the TTC board are a little whacky. Ignore them stay on 1st tri.

     

    You do know they can see these boards too right?

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  • I had a similar problem on the boards for The Nest. I just stopped posting and used the website as a resource only. It sucks that you can't just write about what's going on, ask for advice, or give guidance without one or two random goofs jumping on your case. Don't feel too bad about it. Life's tough, and we as women need to be even tougher!
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  • image hansonam446:
    nbsp;Dear God, WHYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!nbsp;


    Haha!! I love this!
    BFP #1: 5-14-2010, DD born 1-22-2011
    BFP #2: 4-20-2012, Natural MC 5-1-2012
    BFP #3: 7-19-2012, DS born 3-27-2013
    BFP #4: 9-13-2014, MMC discovered 10-27-14 at 10w, d&c on 11-6-14 

  • You have to be careful on boards, always read the stickys, info and lurk a while to get a vibe of the board.  You made a mistake.

    But there's no need to tuck your tail and run. A sincere apology works wonders and sure there a people who don't forgive and forget...but should you really let them bother you?

    Also most boards don't really care for you to "say goodbye" from lurking here and on the knot... it's entertainment for them to laugh at.  So for other bumpies who read this who want to leave...just leave. A post is not necessary. If you have friends, let them know in a private message.

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  • If someone posted something offensive, or even off the wall batshit crazy, and then posted only normal non-red flag thing I am sure I wouldn't remember the screen name. I think if you stay off the TTC boards, you will be fine. I am sure there are plenty of smart women over there who can dole out good advice. So stay if you would like, leave if you must. Congrats on the baby good luck.
    Mom to 4 cute kids, 10 y/o girl, 8, 6, and 1.5 y/o boys
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  • dp!

    Mom to 4 cute kids, 10 y/o girl, 8, 6, and 1.5 y/o boys
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  • Honestly? F*ck 'em. Stay on the Bump if it helps you and you enjoy it.
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  • You have a thin skin but are too gutsy for it! I'm amazed this GBCB post is going as well as it is. Usually they're filled with hilarious Dawson's crying, and not just one. If you have a thin skin, stay away from GBCB posts! Although, I'm glad you posted this; I love these posts!

    I do hope you take this friendly, and not snarky. ;) I'm pretty thin-skinned too, which is why I usually don't start threads and don't look at threads once I've posted in them. I try to never offend people, but that ain't always gonna go the way I want. 

  • Aw don't leave ):  I mean things happen. It's just hard when TTC people see others getting PG, it's frustrating.

    But you should stay! People will get over it. Time goes on<3 

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  • Aw don't leave ):  I mean things happen. It's just hard when TTC people see others getting PG, it's frustrating.

    But you should stay! People will get over it. Time goes on<3 

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  • image Bride-hilda:

    You have a thin skin but are too gutsy for it! I'm amazed this GBCB post is going as well as it is. Usually they're filled with hilarious Dawson's crying, and not just one. If you have a thin skin, stay away from GBCB posts! Although, I'm glad you posted this; I love these posts!

    I do hope you take this friendly, and not snarky. ;) I'm pretty thin-skinned too, which is why I usually don't start threads and don't look at threads once I've posted in them. I try to never offend people, but that ain't always gonna go the way I want. 

     

    It's a shame really because JVB has the best cry face.

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  • I'm gagging sitting here reading these posts and I'm pretty sure it's not the M/S.  

    Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!

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