Working Moms

Anther update to out of control coworker...

If you have been following me over the last week you know that I have been in utter turmoil with my new coworker. I am a seasoned Nurse Practitioner that decided to pursue a whole new avenue of surgery. Needless to say, the guy training me was an enormous bully. I was met daily with furor, rage, swearing and screaming. You all tried to convince me to go to HR because of his inappropriate behavior. My happiness and satisfaction in my career means more to me than slander, rage, cynicism and raging gossip. I am in this profession to help people heal (and i am pretty good at that).

Well, today I reported him to HR and contacted my old boss. I think my old position is probably filled, but I figured it couldn't hurt to ask.  

My main concern is, how do I quit a job after only 1.5 weeks? That will look really bad on my resume! 

Re: Anther update to out of control coworker...

  • image jeffsjayme:
    With a nicely worded letter.

    As in Sunshine and roses or the truth???

    "Thank you for such an amazing learning opportunity...." or  " I have decided to leave because I do not desire to be part of a hostile work environment" 

     

    This is a MAJOR hospital in the area, I want to keep it good with them. How do I quit? 

  • image Poppywedding:

    image jeffsjayme:
    With a nicely worded letter.

    As in Sunshine and roses or the truth???

    "Thank you for such an amazing learning opportunity...." or  " I have decided to leave because I do not desire to be part of a hostile work environment" 

     

    This is a MAJOR hospital in the area, I want to keep it good with them. How do I quit? 

    Not the whole truth, but not lies either.

    Dear HR, I regret to inform you that I have found another position and my last day here will be X/X/XX.

    Sincerely, me.

    Then if they do an exit interview, you can decide how truly honest you wish to be.

  • Is this the coworker that threw things at you or am I confusing you with someone else?  I would wait one or two days and see how HR handles it before deciding to quit.  I mean, who knows, they could fire HIM and you could stay in that position!

    Best of luck

  • image breathlessbride:

    Is this the coworker that threw things at you or am I confusing you with someone else?  I would wait one or two days and see how HR handles it before deciding to quit.  I mean, who knows, they could fire HIM and you could stay in that position!

    Best of luck

     

    I agree, I'd wait a couple of days to see how HR responds. 

  • I would doubt that he would get fired...some people are so valuable that they can get away with bullying. I would wait to see how hr responds though. They may be able to help you in another position.
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  • Based on the experiences that my DH has had in the hospital with these kinds of personalities, I doubt this is the first time he has been reported to HR. Let them help you through the process.

  • image Poppywedding:

    My main concern is, how do I quit a job after only 1.5 weeks? That will look really bad on my resume! 

    If you end up quitting, I would not put this job on your resume.

    ETA: I agree w/ others and wait a cpl days and see if HR handles the situation. Also, I have heard others filing grievances against employees they cannot work with. You may want to research this option. Or maybe that is what you did w/ the HR complaint. I'm not sure if they are diffn't.

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  • I wouldn't quit until you see how hr handles it. I am sorry you are in this position.
  • Why don't you just request to be trained by another surgeon?  You are correct, it doesn't look good to have a job that only lasted 1.5 weeks.  I agree with PP that I probably wouldn't put it on my resume.  They will not fire the surgeon, but will likely reprimand him, send him to anger management, or suspend his priviledges.  Surgeons are in a different chain of command then nurses or OR staff so you have to have your superiors report to his with complaints and they will deal with him.  

     If you do quit (which seems rather premature since you have just reported it and given them no chance to address the issue), absolutely do not slay him or the hospital in your resignation.   That won't go over well.  Just say that you regret that the position isn't a good fit for you and you will be moving on.  Thanks for the training etc. 

     

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  • Ditto the others, wait to see what happens. Maybe they can switch you around or figure something out. I suspect you're not the first person to come forward about this person so you never know how things might play out (though I agree unlikely anything will really happen to him). I wouldn't move on until you have something set up (I'm assuming that you were not planning to)&  also would not refer to him in the letter, just that it was not a good fit for your personal and career goals or something like that.

    GL. Crappy situation :(

  • image jenn_darrin1515:
    I wouldn't quit until you see how hr handles it. I am sorry you are in this position.

    I completely agree. Reporting him to HR was meant to resolve the situation, right? What's the point of leaving before you get to see the resolution? In the meantime, you could say "Perhaps we should take a break until you're feeling better" and then walk away. You might only have to do it once to make your point.  

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  • Wait to see how HR responds.  If this is a major hospital, there has to be someone else who can train you.  This jerk can't possibly be the only surgeon there.
     
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  • image LoCarb:
    image Poppywedding:

    My main concern is, how do I quit a job after only 1.5 weeks? That will look really bad on my resume! 

    If you end up quitting, I would not put this job on your resume.

    ETA: I agree w/ others and wait a cpl days and see if HR handles the situation. Also, I have heard others filing grievances against employees they cannot work with. You may want to research this option. Or maybe that is what you did w/ the HR complaint. I'm not sure if they are diffn't.

    I agree When I was in college something similar happened to my mom.  I remember talking to her on the phone and she was in tears about how her new boss was treating her.  She put in her notice and was able to find a new job shortly thereafter.  Once she had the new job, where she ended up staying until retirement, she took the other job off her resume given she was there less than a month.  

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  • Honestly I still liked the suggestions about confronting him directly... just saying "I am a human being and deserve to be treated like one. When you feel like acting like one come and find me and we can continue training." If you're planning to quit anyway it's worth a shot. If it were me and HR didn't intervene I'd probably be throwing things back at him by the end of the week. What an idiot.
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  • So sorry he's back up to his old antics, Poppy!  I would suggest:

    * Waiting to see how HR responds- if they can make this work, I'd try to pursue that.

    * If HR can't make this work, ask them if they have a position in another department they could transfer you too.

    * If they still can't, I would move on and leave this position off your CV- if anyone asks about the brief gap, just say you needed some time off for vacation/personal reasons/home improvement projects/whatever between jobs.

    In terms of burning bridges, I think you're in a tough position.  If you apply to the hospital system again in the future, their records will surely show that you had been employed there before and left after a very short period.  I guess you'd have to explain as professionally as possible that your trainer was cursing at you and throwing items, and that you didn't feel you could work safely or provide good care under his supervision.  Unfortunatly, drama doesn't sound good in an interview- even if you weren't the cause of it.  Even though you may be burning a major bridge, I'd still leave if I were in your shoes- there is no way you can continue to work with someone like that on a daily basis.

    By any chance, do you have a union that could help you with this?  Good luck to you!

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  • Good for you. It's so ridiculous that someone even thought they could behave in such a way in a professional atmosphere. My idea would just be to not put the job on your resume. Just put your previous job on your resume and say you wanted to pursue a new opportunity. As long as there is not a big whole greater than a few months I don't even think they'll ask. This day and age, with the economy the way it is, it cannot be that uncommon to see candidates now that are unemployed or have small gaps in their resume. Good luck to you.
  • image JennJenn613:
    Honestly I still liked the suggestions about confronting him directly... just saying "I am a human being and deserve to be treated like one. When you feel like acting like one come and find me and we can continue training." If you're planning to quit anyway it's worth a shot. If it were me and HR didn't intervene I'd probably be throwing things back at him by the end of the week. What an idiot.

    I agree with this. Don't resign just yet. If HR doesn't resolve the problem, I would confront him directly. And like someone else said, there must be someone else who can train you. This jackass is ruining what sounds like a great opportunity for you. If you do decide to leave, just write a professional but honest letter about why you are leaving. My guess is he has treated others this way and they will understand your reasoning.  But I would try to stick it out awhile longer and keep trying different ways to resolve the situation; that will prove your tenacity to your boss and colleagues. Good luck and keep us posted!

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  • Wow, thanks for all the advice.

    Nope there is no one else that can train me, he is the only one doing this position (long story). 

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