2nd Trimester

Is Dr. Wrong?

First time posting on here :). This is my first baby and I'm 32 years old. I have a question about something my Dr. said at my last appointment. At my last apt. I was 25 weeks and had gained 10 pounds total. I started out at a healthy weight and BMI of 23 and had only gained 5 pounds up until my last appointment then I put on 5 pounds in a month. I knew I hadn't been exercising as much because I've just been tired and busy with work etc. I've always been very active I was a runner before pregnancy and have continued to exercise some and walk and run. He told me 5 pounds was a lot and they only wanted women to gain 15 pounds total. I told him my eating habits hadn't really changed and he told me pregnant women should eat less. I was shocked. I'd never heard this. He also said the more weight you gain the bigger the baby and the harder labor is to get the baby out. He said it can cause problems with the baby's shoulders etc. I was really upset when I left. I've always struggled with my body image and had a hard time during this pregnancy getting used to the fact I'm going to gain weight. I thought I was doing really well but he made me feel horrible. I'm afraid it's too late too switch Doctors now. We live in a rural area and there are only 2 OBGYN's in our area and they are both in the same office. I hate questioning the Doctor but his advice just seemed wrong to me.  Just thought someone else out there might have some advice. 
NenaO
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Re: Is Dr. Wrong?

  • I believe those are very old school beliefs and he has not started to abide by the new guidelines.

    http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/aboutpregweightgain.html 

    For women who were a normal weight before pregnancy with a BMI of 18.5-24.9 the recommended weight gain guideline is 25-35 pounds. 

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  • I have never heard this before.

    Before DD, I was a cheerleader and very active and healthy.  I probably gained 40-45 LBS my entire prgnancy.  Me and Baby were completely healthy throughout the pregnancy, my OB. never said anything to me about the weight, I didn't have GD and my labour was fine.  DD was 7 LBS 8 OZ and is a perfectly healthy 2 year old now.

    Sorry, but IMO, I think your Dr. is crazy.

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  • I'm going to say your doctor is probably right. I don't know what the right answer is here b/c I don't know your history or your starting weight but your doctor does so I would assume he is giving you his advice based on those factors. every pregnancy is different. My doctor wants me to gain around 30 lbs but I am very small to begin with.

    the eating less thing has me scratching my head. you are not suppose to eat for two though. you are only suppose to add a couple hundred calories to your diet.

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  • First, his advice is old school.  However, he likely was focusing on a 5 pound gain in 1 month vs total amount gained.  It's a matter of perspective.  Even though your weight gain is fine now, it obviously wouldn't be good for you to keep up a 5 pound a month gain.  But that's making a big assumption and most doctors expect that you'll have some higher months and some that are more even.

    All that said, if you don't switch doctors, don't be afraid to A) ignore "advice" he gives that you know/feel is incorrect or B) flat out tell him that you've done your research and are comfortable with the decisions you're making.  It's not like he can make you adhere to his outdated information.  Doctors are smart, yes.  But they also have opinions that aren't always based in medical fact.  This goes for your pediatrician, too.  Never be afraid to do your own research and weigh that against any discussions you have with the doctor.


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  • Your weight gain doesn't mean too much about how much baby will weigh. My mom only gained 6lbs her entire pregnancy with me, and I was 8lbs something.

     

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  • I have never heard of a doc telling a person of healthy weight to only gain 15lbs.  I only gained 15lbs with DD but thats because I already had that weight cushion.  EVEN NOW I am still overweight with twins and they want me to gain at least 45lbs.  
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  • Thanks everyone. Everyone I've talked to said not to worry about it and it probably was because I'd only gained 5 up until then and then suddenly gained 5 in a month. I started at 148 pounds and I'm 5' 8". I'm now at 158. I honestly don't think I've done anything different this month. I hadn't even been showing up until about 23 weeks. Baby just really started growing the past few weeks. Some of his advice I just felt was wrong especially to someone who was really healthy before. 
    NenaO
  • 15 lbs max it what OB's recommend seriously overweight people gain, or not go over. So, ummm, not you! I fall into the not over 15 lb category, and I don't know if it's like this for all overweight women or just me, but I eat whatever I want, and I don't pack on lbs in pregnancy because my metabolism is running a lot higher. If you're eating right and being active, and you've gained 10 lbs, then your body needs that weight.

    Now, most women put on the majority of their baby weight in the third trimester, so maybe he is worried a lot more weight will be gained then, but telling you no more than 15 lbs for the whole pregnancy isn't right. Telling you pg women should eat less is a big fallacy. You are suppose to be taking in 300 more calories I believe. Also, five lbs in one month, a chunk of that could be water retention or a big poop. I yo yo all over the place with my weight, as much as 6 lbs, just from water and bowel movements. I don't know where you are, but it's hotter than hell right now, and I've definitely been retaining water these past couple of weeks. 

     

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  • Like pp's have said, 15 lbs for a woman in the normal BMI range is not in line with current recommendations.  And five pounds in a month isn't really that much if baby had a growth spurt in there, and maybe you were at a low point in normal weight fluctuation at the previous appointment and then high point at the most recent one.  I definitely wouldn't go off of one delta here, but wait to see if it was a pattern, espeically since you are continuing healthy habits through pregnancy.
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  • I've never liked the BMI scale much either. I've never been super skinny but always had an athletic body because I was always into sports. I always hated weighing because I felt like I weighed more than I looked like I did. I wish they measured more on measuring your body fat. I have been retaining some water because it's like a sauna outside. Humidity of 90% or higher here. 
    NenaO
  • image mrs.kapow:

    I believe those are very old school beliefs and he has not started to abide by the new guidelines.

    http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/aboutpregweightgain.html 

    For women who were a normal weight before pregnancy with a BMI of 18.5-24.9 the recommended weight gain guideline is 25-35 pounds. 

    This. Time to find a new doctor. If those are his views on pregnancy, imagine what would happen during L&D...?

    He is cray-cray, and I'd run for my life. [He was right about the extra weight, as in, over the amount recommended, can cause a harder, more difficult labor.] But you can gain 70 pounds and still have a normal sized baby. I gained 70 and my son was 7.7. I've also met women who only gained 20-25 lbs and had almost 8 pound babies. It really just depends. I'm annoyed that he made such a blanket statement.

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  • image dande2129:
    image mrs.kapow:

    I believe those are very old school beliefs and he has not started to abide by the new guidelines.

    http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/aboutpregweightgain.html 

    For women who were a normal weight before pregnancy with a BMI of 18.5-24.9 the recommended weight gain guideline is 25-35 pounds. 

    This. Time to find a new doctor. If those are his views on pregnancy, imagine what would happen during L&D...?

    He is cray-cray, and I'd run for my life. [He was right about the extra weight, as in, over the amount recommended, can cause a harder, more difficult labor.] But you can gain 70 pounds and still have a normal sized baby. I gained 70 and my son was 7.7. I've also met women who only gained 20-25 lbs and had almost 8 pound babies. It really just depends. I'm annoyed that he made such a blanket statement.

     This. How old is your Dr?

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  • From what I have read, 5lbs in the first trimester and then 1lb per week after that is considered the "norm," but not every woman is built the same, and not every pregnancy goes the same. 15lbs seems very low for someone who was not overweight to begin with. I know for my pre-pregnancy height and weight (5'10" and 150lbs) the recommended gain is 25-35 lbs. I would do some more research on this (actual medical evidence, not just baby board opinions) and print out the published recommendations to take with you and discuss with your doctor at your next appointment. If he takes it as you challenging his authority and questioning his judgement and gets upset about it, I would definitely look into switching doctors.
  • When talking with my two grandmothers, this is exactly what their doctors told them.  Like PP said, I also believe this is an old school belief.  You should definitely NOT be eating less.  The PP that posted the guidelines shows just what my doctor recommended.  As a general guideline, I think they suggest about a 5 pound gain in the first trimester (which isn't always possible) and then about 1 pound per week until delivery.  That is, of course, very general and much of it depends on your weight at conception, but it gives you an idea.  I'd consider asking to see the other OB.
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  • I am about your height, 5'8", and started out at about 135.  I'm currently 146 so I have gained about 11 pounds at 21 weeks.  Everyone in my OB's office has said that my weight gain is right on target and it is quite clear that there is more than just body fat accounting for this weight.  It does sound like your doctor is using an older model and while it is good for OBs to counsel on healthy eating and exercise in pregnancy, for him to make this amount into a big deal when you're healthy, it is a bit concerning.  I wouldn't say that this would be enough for me to switch (especially if there are not many choices in your area) unless he seems to use an older model in other aspects of his practice which you can ask him about directly, or ask his staff or other moms who have delivered with him.  


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  • I was not overweight pre-pregnancy, but weight gain due to pregnancy has never been a concern of mine. I eat when I'm hungry. I think I gained 25 lbs with DD and close to 30 with DS. Nursing is an amazing way to lose the baby weight, and I was actually underweight after my kids were done nursing. I really would not be concerned, unless it gets to be a health issue which it does not sound like it is.
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  • I have asked around with others who delivered with him. One girl told me he constantly picked on her about her weight especially at the end when she had retained a lot of water. Someone asked his age. He's in his mid 50's. I do know he's on a huge exercise kick right now I see him running around town a lot and he's super skinny. It made it even harder to hear coming from a man who no matter how many babies he's delivered doesn't know what it's like to be pregnant. His bedside manner has never been good. I went to him once before when I was around 28 for a gyno appointment and he made a point of telling me that I was nearing 30 and it was much harder for women to conceive over 30. I was so insulted I was no where near ready to have a baby 4 years ago and was insulted he would even suggest it. Like I said we live in a very small town and our OBGYN choices are very limited. 
    NenaO
  • It's unfortunate that your physician choices are so limited, but I know that's often the case in rural areas. I don't think he's crazy, but he's just operating on outdated information. He probably went to medical school in the 1980s and was learning based on what was known in the late 1970s. There have been a LOT of changes in what the medical establishment things about pregnancy care in that time.

    I would get your hands on a bunch of good pregnancy books -- I like the Mayo Clinic book -- and try to educate yourself about more modern views of pregnancy care. And keep in mind that just b/c he has these outdated views doesn't mean he can't do a perfectly fine job delivering you. In fact, I would expect that you are less likely to recieve many of the unnecessary labor interventions that have become so common.

    This is the book I was talking about:  http://www.amazon.com/Mayo-Clinic-Guide-Healthy-Pregnancy/dp/0060746378

    I also like: http://www.amazon.com/Mother-All-Pregnancy-Books-Conception/dp/0764565168/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347030036&sr=1-1&keywords=mother+of+all+pregnancy+books

    (Neither of those are amazon affiliate links. :) )

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  • I think that is crazy. I am 5'3 and started at 115 and am 19 weeks today. I now weigh 140. I had two losses before this baby and MFM said with this pregnancy they wanted me to eat 3000 calories a day and gain at least 50lbs. My regular OB has never said anything about me gaining to much. Every BODY is different and my advice to you is eat as much as you feel you need to and don't worry about it. Baby needs nutrition and your body will let you know when you are full and when you are hungry. I don't care the least of how much I gain, i just want a healthy baby and I know the weight will come off after birth! With my two losses I couldn't gain anything I am so pleased I am able to pack on some lbs with this one!!
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  • image nenap:
    Like I said we live in a very small town and our OBGYN choices are very limited. 

    Go to the next town over? I'd be willing to drive further for an OB I was comfortable with, that didn't patronize his patients. That's ridiculous and positively uncalled for. *** him. Seriously.

    Chances are, not every single OB in your town believes the same. I'd look for a younger doctor in hopes of having one that has correct, updated information re: pregnancy and women.

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  • image lucy460:

    It's unfortunate that your physician choices are so limited, but I know that's often the case in rural areas. I don't think he's crazy, but he's just operating on outdated information. He probably went to medical school in the 1980s and was learning based on what was known in the late 1970s. There have been a LOT of changes in what the medical establishment things about pregnancy care in that time.

    As a practicing physican, he should be continuing to be up on the times and studies/research/different, proven information given in his field. Period.

    Would you want a firefighter/paramedic who went to school in the 80's (with different car seat regulations) to advise parents on how to properly install a car seat without ever retaining and advising of the new guidelines? 

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  • image dande2129:

    image nenap:
    Like I said we live in a very small town and our OBGYN choices are very limited. 

    Go to the next town over? I'd be willing to drive further for an OB I was comfortable with, that didn't patronize his patients. That's ridiculous and positively uncalled for. *** him. Seriously.

    Chances are, not every single OB in your town believes the same. I'd look for a younger doctor in hopes of having one that has correct, updated information re: pregnancy and women.

    This. How far are you from the next town? If that is not an option I would definitely look into the other doctor at the practice OR, if you are able to ignore his comments on your weight, have a very in depth conversation about what he thinks about delivery - I have a feeling he will disregard what you think so you need to be prepared for what he is going to tell you that you "have" to do.  


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  • His advice is just wrong.  I believe at a normal BMI, you are expected to gain 25-30lbs or so.  It would be expected that you should try to only gain 15-20 if you had been overweight begin with.

    If you are overeating beyond belief and gain much more than 25-30, then yes, you may have a bigger baby, or you may just have more weight to lose afterwards.

    For reference, I gained 35lbs with my DS, he was 9lbs 2oz, and yes it took me a little longer than I would have liked to take off those last 5 lbs or so.

    But also, my MIL gained 60lbs with my DH, and he was only 8lbs. 

    Personally, I keep track of my weight and try to eat healthy, to attempt to stay within the 25-30lb range.  I don't worry about it for the sake of trying to modify what weight my baby ends up being, as baby will weigh whatever he/she will weigh, big or small.  I try to pay a little attention (but don't stress) just so that I don't have tons of unnecessary weight on my body, as my body is going through enough already and added weight won't help.  But, I do allow myself to indulge in treats here and there, and I don't exercise at all (unless you count chasing a 3-year old around). 


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  • I have NEVER heard this before! I'm sorry but your doc is crazy. I was told 1-5 my first trimester and then a steady pound a week was the deal after that. Even on here it says 1-2 pounds a week after the first trimester. Eating less is nuts too your supposed to consume about 300 calories a day MORE! I would say that if the other OB is a female you should go to the other. Otherwise I would say talk to him about that it's not right for him to say that your baby would most likely be underweight if you eat less and don't gain very much.
  • What I have learned is that weight gain is subjective

    I have been to 3 different drs in my practice and all 3 have a different opinion.

    The first dr said to only gain 15 lbs (i'm overweight)

    the 2nd dr said not to gain anything

    The 3rd dr (who I saw today) was not at all concerned that I gained 8 lbs this month although I hadn't gained a pound up to this point

    She did say that most women have one month that they gain much more and this was probably my month

     I personally would start seeing the other doctor.  I have never heard of a woman eating less during her pregnancy

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  • Don't listen to him! I only gained 25 lbs with my son, the least amount of weight that they recommended I gain, and still had an 8lbs 6oz baby boy who was born on his due date. I had less than 9 hours of labor and only pushed once before he was out!
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  • Thanks for all the advice! I'm going to reschedule my next apt with the other OBGYN in the office. I could go to another town I'm just worried if something were to go wrong I'd have to go to our local hospital anyway and there's a 50% chance he'd be the one I'd see. They work different days so just going to tell the office I can't come in on those days anymore. 
    NenaO
  • the average weight gain is 28 lbs.  Your doc is full of crap.  Men should not be womens docs because they don't know crap about how it is to be a women.  They only know what they read and through other docs opinions.  I can't stand male docs as they often treat women like they don't have a clue.  I also wouldn't want to be a mens doc as I am a women and don't understand their anatomy first hand.  Ladies get a female doc or midwife who has had children through natural childbirth, they tend to be the most understanding and helpful.  You need support not someone who says your getting fat.  Of course we are getting bigger we are working hard to produce a super healthy human, let see a man do that! 
  • image nenap:
    I have asked around with others who delivered with him. One girl told me he constantly picked on her about her weight especially at the end when she had retained a lot of water. Someone asked his age. He's in his mid 50's. I do know he's on a huge exercise kick right now I see him running around town a lot and he's super skinny. It made it even harder to hear coming from a man who no matter how many babies he's delivered doesn't know what it's like to be pregnant. His bedside manner has never been good. I went to him once before when I was around 28 for a gyno appointment and he made a point of telling me that I was nearing 30 and it was much harder for women to conceive over 30. I was so insulted I was no where near ready to have a baby 4 years ago and was insulted he would even suggest it. Like I said we live in a very small town and our OBGYN choices are very limited. 

    I would have stopped going to him after this statement.  I'm 33 and got pregnant the on the first try after 15 years on the pill.  I would try to find someone else who makes you comfortable and doesn't make you feel bad about yourself.  Good luck!

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  • image dande2129:
    image lucy460:

    It's unfortunate that your physician choices are so limited, but I know that's often the case in rural areas. I don't think he's crazy, but he's just operating on outdated information. He probably went to medical school in the 1980s and was learning based on what was known in the late 1970s. There have been a LOT of changes in what the medical establishment things about pregnancy care in that time.

    As a practicing physican, he should be continuing to be up on the times and studies/research/different, proven information given in his field. Period.

    Would you want a firefighter/paramedic who went to school in the 80's (with different car seat regulations) to advise parents on how to properly install a car seat without ever retaining and advising of the new guidelines? 

    Oh, I absolutely agree. He should be up to date, and being older isn't an excuse for him. But I also live in a state with some very, very rural areas, and I know what it is like to be truly limited in your choice of medical provider. We have many counties that are without some particular specialists altogether, and the next town over may not be as close as one might think. But I do agree with you.

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