2nd Trimester

Having to get rid of a pet..

Any one else think they will have to do this by the time their baby gets here? We have an almost year old mixed breed(of what..no one knows) but he is SO BAD & borderline aggressive, but it kills me to know that we will more than likely have to get rid of him. He is still just a puppy, but he doesn't respond to anything which makes it even worse. Any one else gonna have to take this step??
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Re: Having to get rid of a pet..

  • Puppies go through that stage around a year. I remember my in-law's dog. Augh. She drove me nuts. Biting hands and being stubborn. If you love him and you want to keep him, a good trainer could give you some ways to manage his traits and get him in line. It will take work, but it may be worth it. Even dogs with years of "damage" can be brought around, so a 1 YO will probably come into line pretty quickly once he understands who the pack leader of the house is.

    What kind of behavior is he exhibiting? 

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  • Absolutely not.  They are here to stay.

    It isn't your dog's fault he doesn't behave or listen.   

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  • I am nervous that we will have to get rid of ours too. He is 3 and the main problem is he is just so hyper. He listens to DH, but only listens to me sometimes. He likes to jump on me which is so not ok. He is also very slobbery which is hard to keep up with....
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  • image Sprite2012:

    Absolutely not.  They are here to stay.

    It isn't your dog's fault he doesn't behave or listen.   

    This.

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  • image Sprite2012:

    Absolutely not.  They are here to stay.

    It isn't your dog's fault he doesn't behave or listen.   

    This.  Call a trainer and be a responsible pet owner.

    SS10 - SD9 - DD7 - DS5 - DS born 10/3/12
  • Warning: you will likely get flamed for this thred. With that being said, there are extreme circumstances when you have to do this, but usually its just laziness. We had a lab with severe anxiety. We tried group and private obedience classes, in home classes, medicine, food changes, calming vests, scents, etc and she just got worse with age. The kids knew better than to bug her, but they will be playing independently in the room and she would walk in growling. I was personally attacked by a dog as a kid, so I was not Ok. I was a. l was not OK with dumping my dog or secluding her from family. My FIL had just lost his dog and was quite fond of ours (he would watch her when we traveled so she was very familiar with him and loved him too). It was a hard decision but she's much happier there. I get super irritated when people are just like "Eh...I don't want to deal with it when the baby gets here." We tried everything and spent thousands of dollars because it was our responsibility. Pets aren't disposable.
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  • ACOOKACOOK
    Eighth Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its
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    I agree with PP. A good dog trainer and discipline from you can be very helpful in this situation. I am a firm believer in the fact that you brought this dog into your home to love and care for like family. You wouldn't send you child away if it was behaving badly or going through a rough time? 

    * I don't mean to sound rude or hurtful. I just hate when people get to a point with there pets where they don't want them anymore for whatever reason. I truly believe that you can get through this with time and patience. Don't get me wrong, there are situations when a dog may need to be removed from the home if aggression is to the point of biting or seriously hurting someone. Give you little guy a chance, he may just surprise you. It's amazing how similar taking care of a dog and a child can be. Especially when it comes to discipline. Good Luck!!

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  • Its not the dogs fault he is so bad, it's called lack of training!  I hate pet owners who bring in an animal to thier home, don't train it and then blame it for the problems it has, and gets rid of it.  You don't deserve to have a dog or cat.
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  • ***NEWSFLASH** Most puppies are hyper and need exercise and training.

    Why would you get a puppy right before you're TTC, that seems like terrible planning on all counts.

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  • We've had our cat for about 8 years now and we were worried about having to keep her away from DD since she was awesome with us but did not/does not like anyone else! My sisters are big cat fans and they are a bit scared of our cat because she is so crazy and will hiss at people. No clue why she is like that but she just is.

    Anyways, from the moment we brought DD home (she is now 2 years old) our cat has been amazing with her!! You might be surprised! I know we were!

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  • Nope. When you adopt a pet, you make a lifetime commitment to that pet, regardless of what he does or what life changes you make. You can always find a way to deal with it or fix the problem. Sorry that he's bad, but I'm sure there are ways that you can make it more manageable.
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  • Instead of just letting your dog be "bad", why not train it properly so that you can keep the pet that you took in and are caring for?
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  • My husband is having to get rid of his two year old bengal cats. They are sooo cute and sweet like dogs. However, I am pretty allergic, and right now they are just shut up in their room (yes they have their own room) and they barely can come out. Plus they are pretty curious and anything that moves they think is there toy to play with and attack. So squirmy baby not a good combination. Hes sad but his sister is going to take them so at least he will be able to see them every once in a while. And possibly when we get a bigger place they might be able to come back with us. We will see. The baby and my health is just more important.
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  • If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.
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  • image mabenner1:
    Instead of just letting your dog be "bad", why not train it properly so that you can keep the pet that you took in and are caring for?

    This. Train the dog. Take it to classes, trainers, anything like that.

  • image DelBride2012:
    If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.

    I agree with this.  The idea that she since she got the dog now she could keep it forever no matter what is ridiculous.  It's an animal, not a human being, and there are even adoptive parents of children who end up having the child re-adopted.  There are sometimes situations where it is better for both the people and the animal if the animal finds a more suitable owner.

    Kelly, Mom to Christopher Shannon 9.27.06, Catherine Quinn 2.24.09, Trey Barton lost on 12.28.09, Therese Barton lost on 6.10.10, Joseph Sullivan 7.23.11, and our latest, Victoria Maren 11.15.12

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  • No...I don't have to get rid of my pet.  We actually trained him, so it won't be a problem.

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  • Absolutely not. When I adopted my cat 5 yrs ago, I committed myself to his future and well being for the rest of his life. A dog trainer would be an excellent start, and with the dog being so young, you'll probably nip the bad behavior in the bud fairly quickly. I'm sorry he's such a pain in the @ss, but he's a pain in the @ss that you guys took into your home; please don't give up on him.
  • image Sprite2012:

    Absolutely not.  They are here to stay.

    It isn't your dog's fault he doesn't behave or listen.   

    :Steps on soapbox: 

    There are only a few things that irk me more than getting rid of a pet because of a baby coming...

    This pet was your responsibility and when you took it in, you vowed to give it a longterm, loving home. Just because it gets hard DOES not mean you can just give up on the pet! Would you do that to your child? Its not the dog's fault he doesn't listen. Get a trainer and take care of your animal...

    :Steps off soapbox:

     

     

     

     

  • image itsmevkb:

    image DelBride2012:
    If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.

    I agree with this.  The idea that she since she got the dog now she could keep it forever no matter what is ridiculous.  It's an animal, not a human being, and there are even adoptive parents of children who end up having the child re-adopted.  There are sometimes situations where it is better for both the people and the animal if the animal finds a more suitable owner.

    Lurker jumping in.

    This is aboslutely not correct! I do agree that there are extreme circumstances where you may have to give up a pet. The circumstance presented by the OP is 100% NOT one of those circumstances. I'm sorry, but when you adopt a pet, you are making a lifetime committment. That animal knows nothing but you.

     OP, you are doing a great disservice to yourself and your dog by not getting him trained. One, he's a puppy still and puppies will be puppies. Deal with it. Two, most dogs will have a good turnaround if trainng is needed and provided. Money is not an excuse. Three, is he fixed? It may not  make a huge difference if it's gone on this long, but it's better for him  health-wise anyway, if you do not plan on breeding.

    I'm sorry, but I have a HUGE issue with people thinking it is okay to give away their pets because a baby is coming into the home. My dogs are my first babies. I have severe anxiety attacks weekly thinking about how we are going to keep them taken care of and not have them be upset while I'm in the hospital having the baby. And, believe me there is dog hair all over my house, they still have accidents here and there, and they are crazy spoiled to have our attention at all times. But, I will be doing everything I can when the baby comes to make sure all FIVE of the beings living in my house will be happy and cared for when baby comes.

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  • image maybebride:
    image itsmevkb:

    image DelBride2012:
    If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.

    I agree with this.  The idea that she since she got the dog now she could keep it forever no matter what is ridiculous.  It's an animal, not a human being, and there are even adoptive parents of children who end up having the child re-adopted.  There are sometimes situations where it is better for both the people and the animal if the animal finds a more suitable owner.

    Lurker jumping in.

    This is aboslutely not correct! I do agree that there are extreme circumstances where you may have to give up a pet. The circumstance presented by the OP is 100% NOT one of those circumstances. I'm sorry, but when you adopt a pet, you are making a lifetime committment. That animal knows nothing but you.

     OP, you are doing a great disservice to yourself and your dog by not getting him trained. One, he's a puppy still and puppies will be puppies. Deal with it. Two, most dogs will have a good turnaround if trainng is needed and provided. Money is not an excuse. Three, is he fixed? It may not  make a huge difference if it's gone on this long, but it's better for him  health-wise anyway, if you do not plan on breeding.

    I'm sorry, but I have a HUGE issue with people thinking it is okay to give away their pets because a baby is coming into the home. My dogs are my first babies. I have severe anxiety attacks weekly thinking about how we are going to keep them taken care of and not have them be upset while I'm in the hospital having the baby. And, believe me there is dog hair all over my house, they still have accidents here and there, and they are crazy spoiled to have our attention at all times. But, I will be doing everything I can when the baby comes to make sure all FIVE of the beings living in my house will be happy and cared for when baby comes.

     Well great for you. If someone else does not feel the way you do, telling her to feel differently is supremely unhelpful. Better that this dog be responsibly re-homed than remain in this home where 1) they didn't have the patience and desire to train it properly in the first place and 2) those things are only going to be in shorter demand going forward. Insisting on keeping the dog who is not well-trained and not 100% wanted anymore is just punishing everyone involved, including the puppy. There's nothing special or magical about a dog staying in its first home. We have both adopted older dogs and gotten puppies straight from breeders and you can't tell me for one second that the adopted older dogs were somehow hurt by the transition. 

     

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  • image itsmevkb:

    image DelBride2012:
    If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.

    I agree with this.  The idea that she since she got the dog now she could keep it forever no matter what is ridiculous.  It's an animal, not a human being, and there are even adoptive parents of children who end up having the child re-adopted.  There are sometimes situations where it is better for both the people and the animal if the animal finds a more suitable owner.


    This is bullsh!t.  Bull.  Sh!t.  You took a living thing into your home to provide and care for it, and now you would dump him in an unfamiliar place because you MIGHT have problems down the road?  Find a behaviorist/trainer and get this dog some training.  It's not his fault you have failed him on learning what the boundaries of your house are.

    If you do still decide to give this dog up, please don't ever adopt another pet.  Not even a hamster, mouse, snake, etc.  They deserve better than being dumped when you get tired of them or can't be bothered to train them.

    Also, check this out for really good input on how to introduce the baby and the dog and how to let them interact:  http://babiesandbeasts.blogspot.com/search/label/The%20MOST%20IMPORTANT%20post%20in%20here

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  • image ash2664:
    I am nervous that we will have to get rid of ours too. He is 3 and the main problem is he is just so hyper. He listens to DH, but only listens to me sometimes. He likes to jump on me which is so not ok. He is also very slobbery which is hard to keep up with....

     Ugh this and the OP's post just made me so effing mad. I have 4 dogs, all of which have some sort of "issue" that is a lot worse then being slobbery and I would never entertain the idea of getting rid of any of them. They are MY RESPONSIBILITY, I chose to be their mom and by doing so I made a promise to them. They are not disposable!!! I can't effing stand people who are so irresponsible with pets. GAWD this thread just pissed me off on a beautiful Friday... 

  • I volunteer with my pup through an animal shelter. We visit schools, etc to talk about meeting dogs safely. Whenever we go in to get our official badges, my little dog and I wait near the "surrendering" area. To watch a happy pup come in and then watch its master walk away without him is just awful. The dog looks so hopeful as its led back to a cage... where is my person? When will my person be back?

    I ask that if you must give away your dog (though I hope you reconsider) please find someone to take him or her, not a shelter. Please. 

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  • You will more than likely have to get rid of him?  Have you taken measures to ensure that you won't?  Have you procured any type of training for your dog?  He is not even a year old...That's like the toddler years for a child.  Are you just going to pawn your toddler off on someone else when he/she doesn't respond to anything?  How about taking some measures to help your puppy...like obedience training, daily exercise of 1-2 hours, setting limits, and rewarding good behavior.  I work in rescue and can not tell you how many dogs are put to sleep EVERY single day bc the owner felt they had a "bad" dog, when really they just had a dog that had absolutely no training.  When you got your puppy you were making a commitment...they are a FOREVER dog, not an UNTIL dog.  There are certain circumstances where an owner has truly tried everything and the dog just does not fit with the family, I understand this; I have seen it.  This not the case in your situation.  Take your dog to some obedience classes and educate him and yourself, it will make for a much happier owner and pup.
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  • image ash2664:
    I am nervous that we will have to get rid of ours too. He is 3 and the main problem is he is just so hyper. He listens to DH, but only listens to me sometimes. He likes to jump on me which is so not ok. He is also very slobbery which is hard to keep up with....
     

    He obviously understands the order of the pack if he listens to your husband.  In his mind it is your husband, him, and then you.  You need to fix that with training.  Jumping?  Also a problem remedied with training.  Ignore him when he jumps, turn your back on him.  He is seeking your attention by jumping...do not reward the behavior by giving it to him.  Just turn away.  And alternatively reward with a treat or with a rub and "good boy" when he does not jump.  As far as hyper goes...dogs are hyper people! they require exercise of 1 to 2 hours a day!  

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  • Not a chance. 

    We knew we eventually wanted kids when we brought both dogs into the household. We focused on training and socialization with both of our dogs from the beginning. One is a rescue and one we've had since she was a puppy. If we see any behavior issues, we address with our trainer/behaviorist and do in home sessions (these were especially key for our adopted dog, as he came from a really sad background). They make sure that they both see and interact with kids, other dogs, and adults on a regular basis - and they're monitored carefully for these interactions. We do regular training classes with both of them, and we make sure they're properly exercised (both with us and through doggie day care) throughout the week.

    We're signed up for classes through our trainer on "dogs and storks" - she also offers "dogs and babies" and "dogs and kids" sessions. We've read up on some of the awesome dogs and kids blogs out there, and we've bought a few books on transitioning dogs to a home with kids. We'll do move proactive pre-baby introduction in the next three months.

    BTW, our dogs are high-energy, very intelligent, hyperactive dogs with herding instincts who are EXTREMELY attached to us.

    Work on socialization and get some professional training for your dog now - he's still a puppy. What you see as "borderline agressive" is most likely FEAR, because he doesn't know how to react to unfamiliar situations. I'm suggesting this because I'm assuming you WANT to keep your dog - if you don't, adopt him out now while he's still a puppy and highly desirable.

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  • I'll admit, I judge the *** out of you. The second we adopted both of our dogs, we fell in love. They are our family. I wouldn't even know what to do with myself if something happened to them.

    Were they bad? Hell yeah they were. Our shepherd mix was just a puppy when we got him. He went to the bathroom all over the place, got into the trash, ripped up carpet, ripped up pillows, and was super hyper. We lost a lot of money on fixing those things. But it wasn't HIS fault. We got training for him and took him to doggie day care twice a week to get out his energy. He now is the sweetest boy in the whole world. Sometimes still hyper but he knows boundaries.

    Our second dog we adopted when he was 2. He didn't like people very much because of the shitty life he had before we got him. We worked with him, showed him love, and guess what? He is now not shy anymore. He is still food aggressive but we make him eat away from the other dog.

    This isn't the dog's fault. It's your fault because no where in your post did you say you exhausted all training options. 

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  • image itsmevkb:

    image DelBride2012:
    If you can't handle your pet, it's no use berating you about it. The important thing is that you start looking for a good home now, ideally someone you are close to and know you can trust with your dog. It's sickening to think anyone in this situation would just drop their pet off at a shelter, but people do. You really have to wonder where their fledgling parental instinct is hiding in that moment.

    I agree with this.  The idea that she since she got the dog now she could keep it forever no matter what is ridiculous.  It's an animal, not a human being, and there are even adoptive parents of children who end up having the child re-adopted.  There are sometimes situations where it is better for both the people and the animal if the animal finds a more suitable owner.

    Yes and this is not one.  This situation could be easily fixed.  Also, this "it's an animal not a human being" way of thinking is disgusting.  

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  • I'm not going to get on my soapbox, but I will say that I agree whole-heartedly with PP's who said that a pet is a lifetime commitment.  It takes tons of energy and love to have a dog.  Puppies are puppies.  They needs LOTS of training and it takes time and consistency to work.  Your dog will probably start to settle a little around 1 1/2-2 years old.  We have a 2yo Shiba, which is a VERY active breed and we've noticed a big change in her over the past 6 months as far as becoming much more relaxed.  You absolutely have to work with your pup.  I don't understand why you would give up before 1. You've even tried training (as far as I can tell from your post) and 2. You have absolutely no idea how your pup will be once your LO arrives.  Please try taking your dog to some classes or having a trainer come to your home.  It is 100% worth the money and the effort. 

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