Babies: 3 - 6 Months

I feel like such a failure

I can't get LO to sleep in his crib....I've tried everything! It's not like he won't sleep long, he won't sleep AT ALL! Even if he's completely out he wakes right up in there. I feel so defeated

Married my best friend 5/2/2008
TTC our first miracle since November 2010
BFP 3/16/2011 Chemical Pregnancy 3/20/2011

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Re: I feel like such a failure

  • you are not a failure momma! Hang in there! Someoen told me that if the littlguy wont sleep in the crib then put a sweater or shirt you wear often down as a sheet. Our little guy wil only stay asleep if we ahve three piled up blankets to sleep on in there for him. Hope that helps
  • i use a heating pad to warm the crib up before i lie my daughter down, she hates a cold surface :) 
    Averie Belle March 9, 2012 5 lbs, 11 oz
  • Hey, no worries.  I can't het my babe to sleep AT ALL without at least 30 minutes of screaming!
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  • At least you are trying the crib! My son is still sleeping in his RnP; I'm too scared to try his crib. I know it's going to be a horrible transition - he hates being on his back!! I'm not going to stress about it though... You shouldn't either.

    It's easy to feel pressure by reading posts on here about babies in cribs, STTN, CIO, etc. It seems like everyone else has these perfect baby robots, but i know there are tons of other mommys out there like you and me..our babies are being a little stubborn! :) but you really just need to go with the flow of your baby. Some of the best advice someone gave me when my son used to cry alll the time -" just go with it.". It's great you are trying the crib, and if you feel like you should, keep trying it. BUT don't get upset or feel like you've failed if it doesn't work right away..just go with the stage your baby is in right now. 

    My son is a horrible Napper- today he took 1 45 minute nap and 1 hour long nap. That's it. I find myself getting tense around nap time, and extremely mad when he has these kind of napping days!! But I try to remind myself tomorrow is a new day, and we get to try it all over again! :) just go with it! 

  • No worries, my first wouldn't sleep in his crib until he could roll back to belly. He hated laying flat on his back so once he could roll, he would immediately and then slept perfectly. Until then, he was in the RNP. I probably won't even attemp moving DS#2 to his crib until he can sleep on his belly.

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  • you are lucky! i got one 45 min nap today...total...ugh :( my daughter is the ultimate crappy napper!
    Averie Belle March 9, 2012 5 lbs, 11 oz
  • Where has your baby been sleeping?  DS slept in the pack and play in our room until we were ready to move him.  We tried going right to the crib in his room and it was a no go.  So in a stroke of genius I moved the pack and play a few feet further from our bed and towards his room.  He slept in our hallway a couple of nights, and slept in the pack and play in his room for a few nights too.  Then one night we put him in the crib and he did much better.  He still doesn't like drastic changes to this day, but moving him slowly away from me worked wonders.
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  • You are not a failure! I'm having the same problem with my LO.

    Where does your LO sleep now? Do you use a pacifier? If not, would you be willing to? Have you tried white noise? Or soft music? Does he prefer to be at an incline?

    White noise doesn't do anything for us. But music seems to help the most. 

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  • I went through that with my son.  It won't last forever!!
    m/c - Dec 2005, DS - March 27, 2007, m/c - Oct 2009, DD - Feb 20, 2012

    Proud mother of two breech babies:)

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  • image KatelynEA90:

    You are not a failure! I'm having the same problem with my LO.

    Where does your LO sleep now? Do you use a pacifier? If not, would you be willing to? Have you tried white noise? Or soft music? Does he prefer to be at an incline?

    White noise doesn't do anything for us. But music seems to help the most. 

    He's in a RNP. He uses a paci, we have tried white noise and music and the crib in inclined. I've also tried some blankets to kind of cradle him( under the sheet) he has a jungle thingy on his crib that lights up and plays music that we tried, the soothing seahorse we've tried, tried sleep sacks ( hates being swaddled), he has a projector that puts images of moons and stars on the ceiling... Ya we've tried a lot lol

    Married my best friend 5/2/2008
    TTC our first miracle since November 2010
    BFP 3/16/2011 Chemical Pregnancy 3/20/2011

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  • image EveryNameIWantIsTaken:
    Where has your baby been sleeping?  DS slept in the pack and play in our room until we were ready to move him.  We tried going right to the crib in his room and it was a no go.  So in a stroke of genius I moved the pack and play a few feet further from our bed and towards his room.  He slept in our hallway a couple of nights, and slept in the pack and play in his room for a few nights too.  Then one night we put him in the crib and he did much better.  He still doesn't like drastic changes to this day, but moving him slowly away from me worked wonders.
    I was thinking of trying him in his roomin the RNP... Good to see it worked for you!

    Married my best friend 5/2/2008
    TTC our first miracle since November 2010
    BFP 3/16/2011 Chemical Pregnancy 3/20/2011

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  • this is how we got our son to sleep in his crib from day one. if it's necessary, tire the baby out by playing with him as much as possible, wait for him to fall asleep and slowly, SLOWLY, put him down. if he wakes up, let him cry a few minutes. he'll be so tired that he wears himself out by crying and will get used to the crib.
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  • Sweetie, I'm right there with you!  I am trying to get my LO to sleep in his crib and it's not going well at all.  I won't bore you with the details because it probably won't be helpful to you, and I've posted about it on here recently.  Anyway, I go through ups and downs every day, and feeling like a failure is kind of my new thing right now.  My DH is deployed until probably January so it's all on me... a very lonely place to be!

    I agree with PP, if your LO has been sleeping in your room try to gradually move his RnP to the nursery first so that he gets used to the new room, then try the crib.  A couple of things I'm trying are putting the mattress at an incline (pedi thinks he may have reflux), and using the Magic Sleep Suit (he breaks out of the swaddle within minutes of putting him down in the crib).  Right now I'm letting him sleep in his swing at night and just doing naps in the crib, but am thinking maybe cold turkey is the way to go... just dreading it though so I'm waiting to see when my mom can come out to help me before I try it.

    Good luck!!!  We'll get there!

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  • DS would not sleep in his crib for the longest time (the first 3 to 3 1/2 months basically). Gradually he started sleeping in there for a few hours and now I can get him to sleep there all night. Of course our problem now is he rolls back to belly and can't get back over so I have to constantly go in and flip him.

    Prior to crib sleeping, the only places he would sleep would be in his swing or on my chest. Do what works for you right now momma. Keep trying the crib but don't sweat it if he's not ready for it yet. He will sleep there one day. In the meantime, do what will allow you all to get some sleep. And by the way, you are in NO WAY a failure. I have felt that way myself at times but babies do what they want, when they want and unfortunately sometimes we just have to ride it out. <<Hugs>>

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  • This worked for me so it's worth a try (you may already be doing it, who knows).  I would swaddle and shush, all the usual things.  When I would go to lay him down I would bend at the waist, keeping him against me so that when his body touched the mattress, it was almost as if I was laying on top of him.  Wait a little bit in that position.  Then, very slowly lift away, still keeping hands on him ( I found moving one hand to his chest helped him feel I was still "there." ) Then remove one hand from him, then slowly lift the other hand off.  This process took many, many, MANY minutes haha  But it really helped him transition from being against me to laying there by himself.  GL.


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  • My LO slept in her bouncy seat for the first 3 months. We transitioned her by putting the bouncy seat in her crib at night so she was used to sleeping in her room. We were eventually able to get her in her crib but she had to be swaddled. Now she sleeps in the crib in a sleep sack. Lot of transitioning before crib sleep wa a success in this household!
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  • You are not a failure! We struggled with this too. One suggestion is to put him in a snug onesie to mimic the feeling of being held/secure like when they are snuggled in the RNP. the other thing I would say is, he will let you know when it's time - DD had about a week where Anne was really squirmy and would end up scooted down to the end of the newborn mapper on the pnp and wake herself up. She was just ready to stretch out! We switched to the big part of the Pnp and it went pretty smoothly. From there, transitioning to the crib in her room was harder fore than her!
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  • We just transistioned last week...but lo was in the cradle so her crib is MUCH more comfy. She doesnt go to sleep right away (takes usuall an hr) but she isnt screaming either. If she does get fussy, I go in and pat her on the back.

    Do you have a sleep routine? That has also been helping us. Are you putting lo in when tired?

    Our next step is moving naps from swing to crib---that will be harder for us than the craddle to crib for sure.

    We do NOT put LO in crib when sleeping-otherwise that will be her new crutch-falling asleep on us, and also we want to avoid her waking up screaming wondering how she ended up in the crib. Also, Im not sure how many months your LO is but I would avoid letting LO CIO if under 4 months. Also, I think you want to enforce a positive association w the crib, not a negative by starting LO off by CIO the first times in the crib

    Kingsley Kennedy Wolff born March 16, 2012!!!
  • image Redsoxchick:
    I was thinking of trying him in his roomin the RNP... Good to see it worked for you!

    We did this with our girls! They were in their RNPs in their room for about 3 weeks before we did the official crib transition for nights. I had them practice naps in the crib during the day once they got used to their own room. We just set up the video monitor on them so we can check when we heard them fussing, and usually they would just put themselves back to sleep. Good luck, mama!

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  • DD just started sleeping in her crib. I started getting her familiar with it first. After I would her diaper I would put her in her crib while I went to wash my hands and talk to her the whole time.

    When I put her in her crib, I have to quickly put her on her side and put her blanket on her.  

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  • I'm beginning this thankless process myself right now.  My LO sleeps in his Nap Nanny on the floor beside our bed...I'm about to pull the plug next week when DH is traveling and put the Nap Nanny in his nursery on the floor (while DH is traveling so I don't worry about his sleep being destroyed when he has to work the next day if there are numerous wakings when I go for it).  I'm figuring if I can pull that off, then I can put the NN in his crib for a night or two (I'm not crazy about that set-up, so if a night or two works, then good...if not, back on the floor until he's ready for the crib).  But one step at a time and if I can at least get him into his own room...  GL!!!
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  • Mine have been in their cribs since 6 weeks. Two weeks ago they got colds and were really congested so we had them sleep in their RNP's. Now they don't want to go back to their cribs. They're also still swaddled and are breaking out and starting to roll so we have to break them of swaddles but they won't sleep at all without them. Same as your son, they'll be out in our arms but the second we put them down anywhere they're right back up. They've also been STTN since about 12 weeks, but for the past week DD2 has decided that 5am is the perfect play time. Shoot me, please!

    I was one of those people counting their lucky stars for our great sleepers and now we're having a bunch of issues. I bet he sleeps in a crib before we get the girls to sleep without swaddles :) 

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  • Tonight will be my DS's 2nd night in the crib ever. Up until now he's been sleeping in the bouncy seat. You are not a failure! He'll get it.
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  • im in the same boat and exhausted! except he sleeps with me and DH sleeps on the couch. we don't have a rnp, if he wasn't 4 mos already I'd be willing to start using one! we started zantac for possible reflux yesterday but LO has been sick/feverish for a few days. I am praying the zantac works one he's feeling better. I thought he'd be tired today from not sleeping much the past 2 days but he only has taken 2  thirty minute naps. I feel so frustrated and am starting to feel resentful.
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  • image Redsoxchick:
    I can't get LO to sleep in his crib....I've tried everything! It's not like he won't sleep long, he won't sleep AT ALL! Even if he's completely out he wakes right up in there. I feel so defeated

     

    My DD was like this too- it totally baffled me. My DD #1 had no issues with it. I tried everything, white noise, swaddles, rocking to sleep. Nothing worked. I keep talking about it but Merlin's sleep suit was THE KEY!!! She still doesn't STTN but she WILL SLEEP IN THE CRIB! This is so huge for me! 

    Me- 28 DH- 36 Diagnosis- MFI IVF baby #1- DD, 2 years old MC at 6 weeks in Feb 2011 (FET) IVF #2- BFP! IVF baby #2- DD, 4 months old
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