Potty Training

Almost 4 yo wont poop on toilet

My Son has has poop issues his whole.entire.life.  Now that we are potty training, he does fine telling us when he needs to pee, but pooping is a screaming, crying, fighting ordeal.  I put pull ups on him for 2 days so he would poop and he did, a LOT! Then, after putting him back in undies, he had pee accidents.  So, I'm not doing that again.  I was against it to begin with, but he needed to go so bad. 

Any suggestions?!  Bribery doesnt work! LoL

Re: Almost 4 yo wont poop on toilet

  • I am with you. DS is younger (almost 3) but he pees in the toilet almost ALL the time. He will even get up in the middle of the night to pee, or change his pull up if it's wet. But he WILL NOT poop in the toilet. I have gotten him on the toilet mid poop and made a HUGE deal out of it and how good it was that he got poop in the toilet, but he still refuses. Today I asked why he poops in his pants and he said "because it makes mommy mad".  I try not to get angry but obviously my frustration is showing. I have run out of ideas! We tried to potty train not long after he turned two and had NO luck after 6 weeks so we took a break and started again 3 weeks ago. I am lost too. I feel like if we stop again we are just giving in and possibly making it harder on ourselves somehow.  I will be following this post for any suggestions as well. :)  If I have any luck I will pass it on!

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  • My son went through this. Luckily, I've been working at a pediatric clinic and could get advice from his pedi throughout the whole ordeal.

    Mason started with constipation issues before we even started PTing. This makes it more difficult because they associate pooping with pain. So, for a long while he would hold his poop. And, of course, this is very bad because it causes blocking and even more constipation issues. He peed in the potty just fine.

    He would start by saying his tummy hurt and walk with his butt sticking out- so I can tell he's holding it in. What I did was give him a diaper. We did this for over a week. When he acted like he had to poop and wouldn't go in the potty and wouldn't go in his underpants, I put a diaper back on him. Then, within an hour he would typically poop (and scream) and then we'd go right back to underpants.

    Pedi put him on a daily dose of prescriptive Miralax (so insurance would pay for it) and we gave him LOTS of fiber rich foods and lessened dairy intake. This made pooping easier for him. The negative association he had with pooping and us forcing him to sit on the potty was NOT working. That's why we did it this way. Two weeks ago he started telling us AS he was pooping but would still go in his pants/diaper. Then he just started telling us earlier and we would make it to the potty and he was fine with it. I couldn't believe it.

    I would say, talk to your pedi about it. It might be a medical issue and not just a hard-headed issue, KWIM? If it hurt me to the point of screaming when I pooped then I understand not wanting to go... 

  • DS1 has poop issues too. didn't start until with the trouble until he was potty trained. He pooped the first day on the potty -- it splashed him and he's been freaked out ever since.  :)  I let him poop in a pull up. It's awful for me and I hate it but I know it is keeping him from the stress of the potty. If I force the potty on him, it is going to cause bigger issues. It will happen in time. A good friend of mine went through the same thing. She did the pull up for a long time, then went to pooping in a pull up IN the bathroom, then SITTING on the potty in the pull up. THEN she cut a hole in the pull up so he would poop and it would go into the potty. From there he was finally comfortable pooping on the potty --- he was six years old. I am going to wait it out and let DS1 decide that he's ready. If he starts 1st grade still not pooping in the potty, I will talk to pedi about it.
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