Success after IF

Life insurance

We just had our medical exams to increase our life insurance so it's top of mind and I was just reading in the Sunday paper about a family with four kids under seven whose father was killed by a car while out running, leaving his family with almost nothing in life insurance beyond a small policy, presumably through his job as a teacher/coach. I know a lot of ppl are like this, but it makes me wonder is it just ppl don't think bad things can happen to them, or that it's expensive (not really), or what? This guy's wife is a SAHM and just recovering from breast cancer and their small town really pulled together to help them out for their immediate needs, but hearing stories like this make me so sad, not just because they lost their dad and she her husband, but that if they had some money, at least that worry would be taken care of and the kids would have better opportunities. If you don't have extra life insurance since you had kids, why not? Or even if you do, why do you think ppl neglect this?
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Re: Life insurance

  • maybe its just because life insurance sales people are really annoying... lol. I don't know. I worked in life ins business for a long time and it is strange to think that people wouldn't want to protect their families.
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  • We bought term policies when we were trying to get pregnant to have in addition to what we get through work. I guess that people just don't think it will happen to them, or some people are the "bury my head in the sand and it won't happen to me" type.

    I can't imagine that if something were to happen to leave DH worrying about money - trying to sell the house, pay for child care, etc. It leaves me with peace of mind to know that he would be "free" to make a lot of choices that wouldn't have to do with scrambling for cash.

    This post reminds me - we've got life insurance taken care of, but I should look into long term disability, since at our age, we're more likely to need that type of insurance. 

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  • DH and I both never wanted to feel that we were worth more dead than alive.  

    I had my own money coming into the marriage, luckily, and that would be enough to take care of the kids and me.  And if I died, DH would just keep on working to support himself and the kids.  We have trusts set up for the kids, if something were to happen to us.

    But no one would get any kind of big pay day if the other died. 

    ETA:  it isn't always a "burry your head in the sand" thing when someone doesn't have it.  For us, it truly doesn't make sense.  And it isn't what we want.  Like I said, the last thing I want to be is more valuable to someone dead than I am alive. 

     

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  • DH and I have lucrative insurance policies set up for both of us if we were to die. They would take care of our children for at least the rest of their childhood/education. We asked my brother and SIL to be their guardians and we would never want them to be a financial burden to anyone. I think it can be an expensive proposition for many families and they choose not to think about the consequences of inaction.
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  • i'm a big fan of life insurance too. to us it was extremely important to know that if something happens to one of us, money will not be a concern. now we pay about $75 a month for our policies, which isn't trivial given that we're pretty poor, but us being poor makes it all the more important! once the kids are all grown up and done with college we may shift to a less expensive policy.
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  • my BIL died when his daughter was 3yo and had no life insurance... why?  He was an alcoholic and likely just didn't think about it - many people don't consider things like that at all.

    Actually- they say that having disability is more important b/c you have a higher chance of becoming disabled than just getting killed....

     

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  • We have just increased our life insurance amounts-I have 300K and DH has 1 million.  We also have a whole life insurance policy as well.
  • image UsedToBeGoldie:

    Actually- they say that having disability is more important b/c you have a higher chance of becoming disabled than just getting killed....

     

    Very true...
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  • image LVBlvd:

    DH and I both never wanted to feel that we were worth more dead than alive.  

    I had my own money coming into the marriage, luckily, and that would be enough to take care of the kids and me.  And if I died, DH would just keep on working to support himself and the kids.  We have trusts set up for the kids, if something were to happen to us.

    But no one would get any kind of big pay day if the other died. 

    ETA:  it isn't always a "burry your head in the sand" thing when someone doesn't have it.  For us, it truly doesn't make sense.  And it isn't what we want.  Like I said, the last thing I want to be is more valuable to someone dead than I am alive. 

     

    i guess it makes sense in your situation- however, i do not have money but do have over $100k in student loans that my husband would be stuck with if i died. there is no way on earth that he could afford to pay those loans, as well as childcare for our children so that he could continue to work, in the event that i was dead.

    for us, it is not so much being worth more dead than alive, because life cannot be valued monetarily, but it is about making sure that if something terrible happens to one of us, those left behind would be able to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. 

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  • How do you go about finding out where/how to get Life Insurance.  DH gets his through his job (and it's not much).  What about me?  we are poor too and can barely put money aside for the kids' education, let alone for Life insurance (which makes me feel awful, but I can't pull money out of thin air).   But if I were to look into Life Insurance, how would I do that?  

     

    And now I'm depressed cause we have no money. :(   

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  • image BeccaLandes:
    image LVBlvd:

    DH and I both never wanted to feel that we were worth more dead than alive.  

    I had my own money coming into the marriage, luckily, and that would be enough to take care of the kids and me.  And if I died, DH would just keep on working to support himself and the kids.  We have trusts set up for the kids, if something were to happen to us.

    But no one would get any kind of big pay day if the other died. 

    ETA:  it isn't always a "burry your head in the sand" thing when someone doesn't have it.  For us, it truly doesn't make sense.  And it isn't what we want.  Like I said, the last thing I want to be is more valuable to someone dead than I am alive. 

     

    i guess it makes sense in your situation- however, i do not have money but do have over $100k in student loans that my husband would be stuck with if i died. there is no way on earth that he could afford to pay those loans, as well as childcare for our children so that he could continue to work, in the event that i was dead.

    for us, it is not so much being worth more dead than alive, because life cannot be valued monetarily, but it is about making sure that if something terrible happens to one of us, those left behind would be able to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. 

    Aw, cheer up.  Unless your husband co-signed on your loans or you had a large estate to liquidate, I don't think he'd be held accountable for your student loans.  :)

    We each have life insurance policies.  Mine is smaller than DH's because I'm not working right now.  But it would be enough for a nanny, etc.  We purchased supplemental li for DH.  I could go back to work and earn a similar income, but it's not something I would want to worry about immediately.

    I've known several multi millionaires who have large policies.  I think it's oneo f those things people like for protection.  

    As for people who don't?  Most of the time I think they just don't want to think about the horrible what if. Same reason why people don't have wills. 

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  • I don't have a huge policy and neither does DH. We both have enough to pay off cars and keep a nice savings. We both work now and could probably live easily enough off 1 salary and the policies that we have.

    We both have a 75% STD policy and 50% LTD policy through work.

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  • image LIAngel:

    How do you go about finding out where/how to get Life Insurance.  DH gets his through his job (and it's not much).  What about me?  we are poor too and can barely put money aside for the kids' education, let alone for Life insurance (which makes me feel awful, but I can't pull money out of thin air).   But if I were to look into Life Insurance, how would I do that?  

     

    And now I'm depressed cause we have no money. :(   

    You could contact the company from which you get your property and/or car insurance. Many times insurance companies sell several different products and you might get a discount for already being a customer. Additionally, many companies have the option to purchase more insurance through the company where you and/or DH work and payroll deduction. Of course, if you leave the company, you don't have insurance. But many times it's far less expensive than buying it on your own.
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  • I have what amounts to an income replacement policy on me (term) that would allow DH to pay off the house (if he wanted), pay our joint debt (his car) and pay for childcare.  Since he's a SAHD it's important to me to ensure that he has a home to raise our children in, his vehicle, and childcare paid for in the event I die.  On him I have what amounts to childcare plus some cushion for paying off our joint consumer debt (credit cards).   My salary covers all our expenses but assuming I'd have to hire childcare if he were gone that's the big expense I'd have to deal with and being able to pay off our credit cards in one fell swoop would allow me some breathing room.

    One other issue we deal with is DH is 11 years older than me (late 40s) so while he's in far superior shape, insurance on him is only getting more expensive.  I'm overweight so I'm not in a cheap category.  We reevaluate our insurance needs yearly and considered increasing the insurance on my husband this year since we were expecting multiples.  In the end we did not, having cash flow was more important.

    I have short term and long term disability through my employer which is generous.  We should have a separate policy on DH, again to cover his contribution of childcare which is very significant.

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  • I think it is one of those things you "will get to"  and never put priority on it. I do have some, but to tell you the truth I think it was because of a tramatic event that happened that made us jump so fast to get it.
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  • image charmcitygirl:
    DH and I have lucrative insurance policies set up for both of us if we were to die. They would take care of our children for at least the rest of their childhood/education. We asked my brother and SIL to be their guardians and we would never want them to be a financial burden to anyone. I think it can be an expensive proposition for many families and they choose not to think about the consequences of inaction.

    This.

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  • image LIAngel:

    How do you go about finding out where/how to get Life Insurance.  DH gets his through his job (and it's not much).  What about me?  we are poor too and can barely put money aside for the kids' education, let alone for Life insurance (which makes me feel awful, but I can't pull money out of thin air).   But if I were to look into Life Insurance, how would I do that?  

     

    And now I'm depressed cause we have no money. :(   

    It is very easy to get term life insurance quotes online. We each paid about $20/mo for 20 yr term policies for each of us ($500K policies) before we had kids. Another thing that that ppl don't realize is the value of the "services" provided by a SAHM. Just because you don't earn a salary, doesn't mean that it wouldn't cost your family a lot to have someone else do what you do (childcare, cook, clean, carpool, etc, etc). I would hate to have to delve into college funds or other savings intended for the future to cover living expenses. Federal student loans are discharged upon death, but private ones are due to your estate.
    TTK 9/06 / TTC 10/08 / Twins 12/11 / Life Blog
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    FET w/acu = BFP!, B/G twins!, lost MP @19w, dx w/funneling cervix @20w,
    twins nearly lost to IC @21w, saved by rescue cerclage, 17P & 16w of bedrest
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  • My DH works for an insurance company so life insurance is psrt of his benefit package. If he dies i would get 5x his salary (so it changes up each year). Mine is smaller but still 75k so he could pay off things and provide for hayden. For us it just makes sense to have it.
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  • image kthappy76:
    image LIAngel:

    How do you go about finding out where/how to get Life Insurance.  DH gets his through his job (and it's not much).  What about me?  we are poor too and can barely put money aside for the kids' education, let alone for Life insurance (which makes me feel awful, but I can't pull money out of thin air).   But if I were to look into Life Insurance, how would I do that?  

     

    And now I'm depressed cause we have no money. :(   

    It is very easy to get term life insurance quotes online. We each paid about $20/mo for 20 yr term policies for each of us ($500K policies) before we had kids. Another thing that that ppl don't realize is the value of the "services" provided by a SAHM. Just because you don't earn a salary, doesn't mean that it wouldn't cost your family a lot to have someone else do what you do (childcare, cook, clean, carpool, etc, etc). I would hate to have to delve into college funds or other savings intended for the future to cover living expenses. Federal student loans are discharged upon death, but private ones are due to your estate.

    So do I just google "term life insurance"?  I am clueless.  and you have certainly gotten the wheels turning in my head now.   

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  • We haven't gotten extra since we had DS, but that's because I don't think we need extra.  Between our individual policies and our work policies we have enough to raise DS and pay for his college.  We don't have any debt so 100% of our policies would go to either of us or if we both died to his guardian.  We also both work so we don't feel as pressured to have very large policies.  If I was a SAHM we would increase DH's policy by 2.5x so that I had time to find a job, go to school if I needed to, etc.
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  • image WillisReincarnated:
    image BeccaLandes:
    image LVBlvd:

    DH and I both never wanted to feel that we were worth more dead than alive.  

    I had my own money coming into the marriage, luckily, and that would be enough to take care of the kids and me.  And if I died, DH would just keep on working to support himself and the kids.  We have trusts set up for the kids, if something were to happen to us.

    But no one would get any kind of big pay day if the other died. 

    ETA:  it isn't always a "burry your head in the sand" thing when someone doesn't have it.  For us, it truly doesn't make sense.  And it isn't what we want.  Like I said, the last thing I want to be is more valuable to someone dead than I am alive. 

     

    i guess it makes sense in your situation- however, i do not have money but do have over $100k in student loans that my husband would be stuck with if i died. there is no way on earth that he could afford to pay those loans, as well as childcare for our children so that he could continue to work, in the event that i was dead.

    for us, it is not so much being worth more dead than alive, because life cannot be valued monetarily, but it is about making sure that if something terrible happens to one of us, those left behind would be able to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. 

    Aw, cheer up.  Unless your husband co-signed on your loans or you had a large estate to liquidate, I don't think he'd be held accountable for your student loans.  :)

    This.  As long as you don't have a private school loan as in not FAFSA and your DH didn't co-sign or consolidate his loans with yours then your student loans would die with you.  The fact that they die with you is why DH and I never consolidated our loans together.  Morbid?  Yes, but it also makes good financial sense.

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  • image LIAngel:
    image kthappy76:
    image LIAngel:

    How do you go about finding out where/how to get Life Insurance.  DH gets his through his job (and it's not much).  What about me?  we are poor too and can barely put money aside for the kids' education, let alone for Life insurance (which makes me feel awful, but I can't pull money out of thin air).   But if I were to look into Life Insurance, how would I do that?  

     

    And now I'm depressed cause we have no money. :(   

    It is very easy to get term life insurance quotes online. We each paid about $20/mo for 20 yr term policies for each of us ($500K policies) before we had kids. Another thing that that ppl don't realize is the value of the "services" provided by a SAHM. Just because you don't earn a salary, doesn't mean that it wouldn't cost your family a lot to have someone else do what you do (childcare, cook, clean, carpool, etc, etc). I would hate to have to delve into college funds or other savings intended for the future to cover living expenses. Federal student loans are discharged upon death, but private ones are due to your estate.

    So do I just google "term life insurance"?  I am clueless.  and you have certainly gotten the wheels turning in my head now.   

    More than likely the company that carries your home owners and/or auto insurance policies also offers life insurance.  Also sometimes when you bundle policies you get a discount on the others.  We have our life insurance through Liberty Mutual, we have a rep that works with our company and the cost of our policies is deducted from my paycheck.  

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  • image krissyh21:
    I think it is one of those things you "will get to"  and never put priority on it. I do have some, but to tell you the truth I think it was because of a tramatic event that happened that made us jump so fast to get it.

    Ditto this.

    I would not say that most people want to "bury their head in the sand" or think "it wont happen to me", I think it has a lot to do with the bold above.  My DH has enough insurance on him that I could pay everything including the house off and keep working part time but we don't have much on me, what we do have is through his job. I also get even more if my DH is killed in the line of duty (which I of course hope never happens). I do want to get a lot more on me, but the bold applies to me. I don't want DH to have to worry about working so much if something happens, I want him to be able to be with our girl as much a possible. I'm not worried about being worth more dead and dh is worth more and we joke about it because we are sick people like that. Stick out tongue

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  • We both had large life insurance policies before we had kids- we have not increased them as they are more than enough to take care of them in the event of our deaths. We own several homes so we wanted to make sure there was enough money to pay off all the homes and then have money left over for child care, college, and daily life. Although in the event of my death DH would continue to work we still wanted him to have substantial money to take care of whatever needed to be taken care of. We figured that if the homes were all paid off they can generate residual income for years if they were rented out or I'd they we're sold there would be more money. 

     I believe having a trust and a will  and having life insurance is part of being "financially secure" thinks it's crazy to not have those things in place, especially when you have young children. Life insurance, especially when bought at a young age is very inexpensive why not have it??

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  • DH and I both got some when we were TTC.  At the time we didn't have a ton saved up and it made sense.  DH got over twice as much as me though.  Not sure why because at the time I didn't think I would want to SAH and I could easily reenter the work force if needed, but DH made more than me so he got more.  Honestly now  we wouldn't have to rely on it but it is nice to know that it is there. 

    Honestly some people just never think about it, like those that don't bother getting wills made up.  Others probably think they can't afford it. 

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  • I think its that people just don't really know the ins and outs of Life Insurance.  People assume its really expensive, they hear that their work has a policy and don't really realize that its usually just for a small amount, don't realize their own financial worth over the long haul vs. the immediate.  

    My DH is the "bread winner" so we have a very large policy out on him plus what he gets through work, plus work has an additional rider if he were to get killed while traveling for work.  This amount would let me get out of the house if I needed  / wanted to (sell it for whatever and walk away) so I could downsize to a condo or move closer to family.  It would allow for both kids to have college taken care of and I would be able to not work for a bit to get everything in order.  Basically, it would wipe out the debt we currently have (cars, house etc.) so that I would not have an extra weight or burden.  I'm a teacher and there is no way I could continue the lifestyle we have on my income.  

    I also have my works tiny policy (its like 30K) plus I took out an additional policy which would bring mine up to a couple hundred thousand.  I carry the insurance and have a good retirement and although I don't make what DH does we are accustomed to a 2 income lifestyle so this would give him a buffer too and help with extra childcare so that he could continue to work the way he does now.  

    I think a lot of people live paycheck to paycheck and don't have the extra money per month for it, and just don't think about it till they are older.  

  • DH is a police officer and it was a "must" once we got married for both of us to have additional life insurance.  I know anything can happen to anyone anywhere, but it certainly enters my mind often.

    My parents had life insurance, their parents had life insurance...it is just something we do.

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  • For those of you who don't know where to go to get it- Zander.com is the site that dave Ramsey and Suze Orman recommend- I would start there, it gives you a good idea how how much it costs and you can purchase it online then they have so,eons contact you to do the bloodwork.
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  • I think it is a combination of things.  Certainly people not thinking it will happen to them is a big one.  Not until you have a loss close to you does it hit home.

    It is also morbid and no one wants to set aside the time to think through it.   

    I also think it is difficult to figure out how much you need.  It isn't as simple as a math equation.  If DH was to die, we would not stay in this house.  Also, other expenses would go away.  So when we were quoted for term insurance for a large amount claiming it was what we needed it was too high yet we weren't sure how to scale it back realistically.  I also think we try to balance life insurance with investments.  

    We wound up increasing our insurance through work but I'd rather have term.   

     

  • We both have it. My policy is smaller & DH has a decent one through work. We had a larger additional policy on him that we let lapse during some financial hard times a few years ago, but plan to replace. We actually have an appt set up to reevaluate things. 
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