March 2012 Moms

But doc, why WOULD I be dialated?

My appointment today bugged the crap out of me. Some key quotable exchanges:

Doc: "Second deliveries with an epidural go much faster, and since you had an epidural last time, you should just get one again. You don't know how truly painful it is to push the baby through the birth canal..."
Head response: I'm trying to go natural after a horrible epidural reaction, and a generally terrible delivery experience, last time.
Actual response: I'm mentally preparing myself, I'll be ok.
Doc: "This is soo terrible, you're closed up tight and the baby isn't engaged yet. How horrible!"
Head response: B!tch, are you the one walking around with a watermelon under your skin? I'm two weeks before my due date. Why would I be dialated?
Actual response: Oh, I'm perfectly comfortable if he doesn't come out until St. Patrick's Day. DS1 was late, so this one probably will be too.
And so, I'm gearing myself up for battle. And it sucks that I can't just focus on my labor, but that I have to focus on a doctor who isn't truly supporting me. D'oh! Here's hoping I get an awesome nurse and that I'm able to deal with my labor from home as long as possible... ::sigh::

Re: But doc, why WOULD I be dialated?

  • Is there any chance you can request another doctor? You don't want someone pushing you into doing something you aren't comfortable with or someone who will aggravate you during the birth!

    The Semi-SAHM Blog


    March 8, 2012 - our little Tomato made his debut!
    C-section, FF, CD, SAHM

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  • Ok first I just have to say I was fully entertained by that narration!!!

    2nd... Wow.. what the hell is wrong with your OB?! How on earth is it horrible that you're not dilated and the baby's not engaged when its not like your due date is tomorrow or anything? Geez! My OB was not phased at all by the fact that I had zero progress last week.

    And what is her deal telling you that you should get an epi again since you had one the first time cause for whatever reason you won't be able to handle the pain this time? Kinda insulting!!!


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  • image MrsMincks:
    Is there any chance you can request another doctor? You don't want someone pushing you into doing something you aren't comfortable with or someone who will aggravate you during the birth!

    This or make sure your DH will advocate for you or get a doula to do so! It'll be hard to fend him/ pushy nurses off when you're in labor, so make sure someone will stand up for you.

    Doesnt your doc know dilation means nothing in terms of when baby is coming :P 

    Best of luck! Sorry you had a reaction to the epi last time. 

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers Pregnancy Ticker
  • I'm right there with you! I posted today about an awful Dr. experience, too. Apparently, some of them just do not get it...


  • WOW

    That's not just lack of bedside manner- that's just rude, inappropriate and stupid!  I know soooo many moms that got an epidural the first time and did it naturally the second.  I hope I can be one of those!  My epidural experience was very good but I feel like I didn't experience anything but the painful aftermath.  Maybe your doc won't be available when you deliver?   

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  • Wow she sounds fun.  I wasn't dilated with my last tell the day before I had him, my dr was never once concerned.  I really hope you get another ob when you are actually in labor.
    Wedding 6.18.04 Cole 11.20.06 Gavin 3.31.08 Parker 07.15.10 Logan 04.03.12
  • Oy! What a d-bag. I would suggest a doula as someone else said. I had an epi with my first and am choosing to go natural with this one and we are using one. But... at this point it may (don't quote me) be to late in the game to get one.

    Another thing you could do to enforce your wishes is write up a birth plan. That way you can clearly state that you do not want to even be offered medication. This may help weed out the negative nancys.

    Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
  • I was so irked, I didn't even think about being offended by her comments. Thanks for the support ladies! I feel much better!
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